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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..153154155156157158159..599Next> |
#283 (262/473) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<GreenJelly> omg this lisa chick and me are gonna get married
<GreenJelly> her turnoffs are Arrogant Guys, S&M, and Big Dicks
<GreenJelly> IM SO IN |
#379 (260/470) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Ash> Anybody can get a girlfriend, just like anybody can get a job. Most likely he has a "minimum wage" girlfriend. |
#1423 (187/334) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<katers> my fucking roommate
<katers> needs to stop being a ho
<katers> or cut me in on the action
<katers> one or the other. |
#1825 (230/414) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<madthink> what does putting sugar in someones gas tank do
<maff> I heard when you start the engine cinnamon rolls come out
<maff> with frosting and everything
<madthink> i need to get revenge in the worst way
<maff> cinnamon rolls arent really revenge |
#1909 (175/312) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<tralamat> microsoft donates 5 million dollars worth of software to the rescue effort in new york
<devilish1> 5 mil of software
<tralamat> shit i see cops diggin rubble with an outlook cd |
#2551 (165/293) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Amanda> And do these people in the STD medication commercials really have the advertised diseases, and if not, how much extra do they get paid to say that they do? |
#2559 (225/404) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<gb> BlackDeth: have you ever tasted your own jizz?
<BlackDeth> no
<BlackDeth> or anybody elses jizz for that matter
<BlackDeth> i've shot jizz in my eye
<BlackDeth> but i wasn't aiming
<BlackDeth> so i dont feel as bad
<gb> sure you werent
<BlackDeth> no i mean there was somebody else at the controls
<blazemore> did he apologize |
#3181 (247/445) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jip_> anyone know offhand how to make comments in lisp?
<Jumper> people still use lisp ?
<Liqd_Work> people started using lisp?
<MediArc> people can program?
<Jumper> ..people ?
<MediArc> ??
<drlion> there was light? |
#3315 (168/302) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<FallLine> heh wtf
<FallLine> some people are stupid
<FallLine> i asked this guy to send me a log file from my software...
<FallLine> either cut and paste the last 100 or so lines into the email or attach the entire log
<FallLine> so he prints the entire thing out
<FallLine> scans it in
<FallLine> and then attaches the images INSIDE a word document
<FallLine> and only the first 100 lines
<FallLine> hehe |
#3784 (202/361) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Joshua> funny how sodomy and clowns are linked in my head... i'd better not investigate that any further... |
#3855 (155/275) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<imsoemo> i should sell information on how to join irc on ebay
<imsoemo> FOR ONLY $3 I WILL SHOW YOU HOW TO TALK TO MORE ARROGANT ASSHOLES THAN YOU EVER DREAMED
<CaliburX> Just make it sound complicated and expensive
<CaliburX> Have you ever wanted to talk with other sophisticated beings like yourself for free on your own personal computer? With this 42 step guide your dreams will become a reality and your life will be forever enjoyable.
<CaliburX> Only $99.99 plus shipping and handling |
#4015 (170/302) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<aeflux> I swear 85% of the CS community failed remedial english in 3rd grade
<Gunny> 85% of the CS community hasn't made it to the 3rd grade |
#4075 (188/336) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Zooropa> :B
<Lynkx> you have an ass on your chin |
#4169 (182/325) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sdr> i'm going to play with it first and become familiar, then show her how to use it |
#4247 (263/474) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[Lord-Data] Id like to know.. Who discovered cows could be milked, and WTF WAS HE DOING!? |
#4442 (224/402) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<amit> there was a girl in my english class who had a lord of the rings bookmark. she looked at me, then at the bookmark and said "Bilbo's so hot!" and put it in the cleavage between her breasts. |
#7432 (205/367) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Orz> How old are you jennjenn?
<Orz> 12 right?
<jennjenn> 12??
<Orz> Yeah, comes after 13.
<Orz> Idiot. |
#7767 (229/411) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<faustwork> the gf wants underwear for xmas
<faustwork> i cant stand going shopping for em tho
<faustwork> i feel like a goon
<faustwork> maybe its because i rub them all on my face |
#7796 (173/307) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Daki> thanks i know
<Azalyn> aww
<Azalyn> *smack*
<Azalyn> your so cute when you get smacked
<Azalyn> *smack*smack*
<Azalyn> awwwww!!!!
<Azalyn> *smack*smack*smack!*smack!!-crack* err, oh shit.. o.o i think i killed him >.<
*** Daki (gg@sc-66-74-86-145.socal.rr.com) Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Azalyn> O_O |
#8059 (209/374) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Electroly> kurros has a l33t ass projector, I saw a picture of it just once
and I've been drooling ever since
<T-ball> nice...
<T-ball> I don't have room for a projector... :/
<Brazilian> I have a monkey who draws on my wall really fast |
#8222 (251/452) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<okoshun> The cat's have the right idea..lying on the cool tiles in the dark.
<max> That
<max> Of course they have the right idea. Cat's are perfect.
<max> Or so they like to believe :)
<okoshun> The *are* perfect. ;)
<max> Then explain why the hell the cat fell off my desk yesterday?
<max> You know how I have a corner desk?
<okoshun> A gravitational flaw.
<max> he was lying on his back, and rolled over to stand up
<max> And managed to put his front paw in the empty space in the corner between the two segments
<max> So he put his weight on it to get up, and fell down
<okoshun> max: He did that on purpose.
<max> It was funny as hell.
<okoshun> max: He knew you needed a laugh.
<max> he looked mortified. He left shortly after.
<okoshun> You're just projecting your feelings onto the cat. ;) |
#8830 (224/403) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<pr0k> I could do it when I was like 15, however, the pleasurable sensation of having a mouth on my penis was completely cancalled out by the sensation of having a penis in my mouth. |
#11688 (191/341) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Hydrac7> nothing better than seeing the reaction on fellow classmates faces after explaining bukkake for them
<Alice`> Nothing better than seeing the reaction on fellow classmates faces' after demonstrating bukkake to them
<Aboshi> Alice: The reaction all over their faces. |
#33293 (238/428) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(SlackMuffin) [22:25] <SlackMuffin> winamp(2.80) playing(17 - Katrina & The Waves - Walking on sunshine) stats(38% of 3m 55s )
(SlackMuffin) [22:25] <SlackMuffin> I mean.. winamp(2.80) playing(really cool masculine music.mp3) stats(38% of 3m 55s) |
#33694 (289/525) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(Cloud): I see retarded people.
(@NeoMatrix): Stop looking in the mirror. |
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