QDB: Latest Approved Quotes
About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search

#290 (104/386) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Evilspoon> Legalize cigarettes!
<Evilspoon> wait nm
#289 (237/524) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<rouge> you vegetarian?
<AlmtyBob> yah
<rouge> i'm sorry. :/
#288 (272/505) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<enex> MadHatter: eat shit!
<MadHatter> what
<MadHatter> fuck you
<enex> oh
<enex> hi
<MadHatter> yeah hey
<enex> what's up
<MadHatter> nothing man
#287 (187/584) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<wild-> so a guy goes to the drugstore, he says 'i need some condoms for my 11 year old daughter' druggist says 'your daughters sexually active at age 11?' he says 'nah she just lies there like her mother'
#286 (384/673) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Infe> what happens if you try to recharge an alkaline battery
<HomerJ> blows up
<Andrigaar> Don't they explode?
<Andrigaar> I wonder if it's violent or just some leaking battery acid.
<Infe> i think it's all a scam to get you to pay more for 'rechargeables' and ---
#285 (344/582) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<BlackDeth> that was the night those gay dudes were hittin on me
<BlackDeth> and the one offered me money to go sex0r him
<BlackDeth> they prolly saw i was wrecked
<BlackDeth> and thought they could take advantage
<BlackDeth> boglins own
<ikkenai> so how much did he pay you
<BlackDeth> he didnt
<BlackDeth> he just offered
<ikkenai> oh
<ikkenai> so you did it for free
#284 (302/542) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<ikkenai> what does sex in a boat and american beer have in common
<ikkenai> they're both fucking close to water
#283 (262/471) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<GreenJelly> omg this lisa chick and me are gonna get married
<GreenJelly> her turnoffs are Arrogant Guys, S&M, and Big Dicks
<GreenJelly> IM SO IN
#282 (6/297) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Hatter> I was over-circumsized
<Hatter> the law suit is still pending
#281 (2/470) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
*** Joins: root (kode54@excellent.I.found.yourdads.cc)
#279 (288/524) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<gloone> internet, movies and masturbation ruined my life.
<gloone> but it also made it worthwhile
#278 (14/402) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
*** Joins: SLiPMaTT` (slippy@I.get.my.STDs.from.the.girls.at.geishagarden.com)
#277 (176/400) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Hatter> Sometimes hypr, I can hear the gears in your head grind to a halt
<hypr> haha
#276 (166/406) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<papasui> i bought a box of crab ragoons
<papasui> and i looked to see how many calories are in each one
<papasui> and its freaking 400 and 250 fat calories
<Marcus-> "WARNING: May cause manboobs!"
#269 (105/408) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
n e r d b 5: i smell a burning smell
n e r d b 5: maybe its my pc
n e r d b 5: oh wait, ewww, its the cat pooping
#265 (130/410) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<hypr> i rember in kindergarden the teach took me upsidedown by my ankles and swung me around cause i wasent eating my pees..
<hypr> fucking bitch
#263 (-4/460) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<SWM> i hate your fucking pancakes
<SWM> i never eat them
#261 (188/407) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<EFX>I hate it when the cats stare at me when I go into the livingroom to jackoff to pornos :(
#260 (171/415) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Guilty> Pen, you're going to hae to give something up
<Guilty> You cant go to a gym and run geekissues.org
#259 (204/460) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<reptile-> My hands are soft and girly-like.
<reptile-> Masturbating is so much better for me!
<Taurclave> You dream of handjobs
<DigDug> reptile- pretends that the hands belong to a girl
<Taurclave> He probably has painted nails on his favorite hand
#258 (178/448) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<subHero> Help! i just got my penis stuck in my cdrom!!1
<johndoe92> grab a kleenex and hit 'eject'
#257 (2/304) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<repp0r> Dude, pot first, then porn.
<repp0r> Trust me. It's so much better. :D
<lele> dude i'm doing before AND after
#254 (4/501) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<myhero> I wish I could just poop all day long
#250 (-3/557) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
n e r d b 5: wait a minute. 'my' b-days on 31 may... lol i was thinking aboiut my uncle hehe
e l i t e m r p: umm how could you confuse your own bday with your uncle?
n e r d b 5: their so close together hehe
#247 (-1/505) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
n e r d b 5: you use redhat?
n e r d b 5: thats a program you can get warez from, right?
n e r d b 5: like napster
n e r d b 5: d/l apps from other people
save page | share <Prev1..580581582583584585586..590Next>

About / Browse / Latest / Random / Queue / Prefs / Submit Quote / Search
14,743 quotes approved; 8,841 fermenting; karma: 189.4474