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#309257* (?/13) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Poonicorn: I don't use my laptop much
slungshot326: my hands smell like gasolineComment: wat
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#309300* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <@nortti> I think I have said my installation is a bit screwed up
<@nortti> by me
<@shikhin> :-)
<@nortti> but still, cleaner than ubuntu
<@shikhin> That should be on bash or something :DComment: nortti had just said he doesn't have man installed
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#303589 (-10/1020) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Omi> Who are the hardest people to distract?
<Xa> No clue
<Omi> Jews
<Omi> All that time spent in concentration camps. |
#307889* (?/22) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Explodingpiglets> "How did donkey get the dragon from shrek pregnant?"
<Explodingpiglets> Through scientific reasoning, I have figured out how it worked
<Explodingpiglets> Now obviously, donkey's dick was way too small for dragon's cloaca
<h64> lol
<Explodingpiglets> So Donkey did the only thing he could do:
<Explodingpiglets> he crawled into dragon's cloaca
<Explodingpiglets> and swam through her bodily fluids
<Explodingpiglets> until he found her ovaries.
<Explodingpiglets> Then Donkey preceded to perform self-fellacio
<Explodingpiglets> since he had hooves instead of hands
* nachash (~nachash@210-50-93-160.ade.iprimus.net.au) has joined #ed
<Explodingpiglets> Donkey sucked his own dick until he reached his orgasm
<Explodingpiglets> then he ejaculated all over Dragon's ovaries.
<Explodingpiglets> and that is how Donkey got dragon pregnant
<VapidZero> wtf is with all this fanfic shit
<Explodingpiglets> I should also mention that Dragons have huge periods
<Explodingpiglets> So Dragon had to use Donkey as a tampon.
* NeedsmoarSyrup has quit (Quit: Kurz und Beschissen)
<Explodingpiglets> hmmm
<Explodingpiglets> another interesting question:
<Explodingpiglets> "How does a dragon get a donkey pregnant?"
<Explodingpiglets> Well, this is trickier
<Nyse> are we talking
<Nyse> about
<Nyse> shrek?
<xero> WE ARE TALKING
<xero> ABOUT DILDOS
<Nyse> because
<xero> AND NOTHING ELSE
<Nyse> shrek is the only
<Explodingpiglets> Dragon penises are obviously way too big for donkeys
<Nyse> pixar movie
<Nyse> i can
<Nyse> recall
<Nyse> that has dragon+donkey babies
<Explodingpiglets> So the donkey vaginas have to be enlarged
<Nyse> regardless
<Nyse> i'm pretty sure
<Nyse> the dragon can just juzz
<Nyse> all over the floor
<Nyse> and the donkey can roll around in it
<Nyse> and impregnate itslef
<xero> lolololl
<Explodingpiglets> to do this, the male dragon begins a slow process of enlargening the donkey vaginas by mastubating the donkeys with his claws
<Explodingpiglets> the claws slowly stretch the vagina
<xero> lol wtf
<Explodingpiglets> then the dragon can insert his finger
<Explodingpiglets> and stretch the vaginas even further
<Explodingpiglets> you see, donkey vaginas are very versatile
<Explodingpiglets> after about 6 months of claw/finger masturbation,
<Explodingpiglets> the elongated donkey vagina is ready for the dragon's dick.
<Explodingpiglets> Then the dragon picks up the donkey and uses her like a flesh light.
<xero> this is very educational
<xero> and slightly disturbing
<Explodingpiglets> and then he gets her pregnant
<Thayo> too educational for my tastes
<Explodingpiglets> now I should say that donkey/dragon pregnancies are very different
<Explodingpiglets> The donkey does not lay eggs, so the dragons are born inside her
<Explodingpiglets> and since dragons are very horny and aggressive from the moment they develop, they begin to rape eachother inside the womb
<Explodingpiglets> and they also tear their way out of the donkey, killing her.Comment: Somebody asked how donkey could've got dragon pregnant. I used my knowledge to answer that question.
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#307918* (?/24) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Let's assume you have a Unix user called pussy. Then you are allowed to
touch /home/pussy
finger pussy
Damn, I love Unix :) |
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#307956* (?/16) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag "I may not always be right, but when I am, I admit it" - Ken Murray |
#308011* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Aloha! zsr |
#308217* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag * NekoEd gives Jan a small steel cube as a gift
< Jan> the hell do I do with this
* NekoEd puts Jan into his chair at his desk and puts the cube onto the desk
< Jan> (╯‵Д′)╯彡 ┻━━┻ |
#308508* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Greys> are any of yous good at words?Comment: ROFLMAO
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#308618* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <CareBear> I can contain myself for tonight cuz I don't have a boner pokeing at my ass tonight LOL.
<Terminal> Anal eh?
<CareBear> No.
<CareBear> While being cuddled, he has a boner.
<CareBear> And just the whole feeling of it poking at my thigh, is enough Laughng-ut-Loud.
<TheJayson> yeah that happens
<TheJayson> we men while cuddling will often suffer inappropious-erectous
<CareBear> TheJayson, I know...but I don't complain. |
#308687* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag HURRRRRRRRRRRRRR
DURRRRRRRRRRRRRR
football
HURRRRRRRRRRRRRR
DURRRRRRRRRRRRRR |
#308805* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Every song has a story, Every story has a beginning and Every beginning has an EndComment: from Roses
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#308847* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Comment:
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#308851* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag albvf9 :) , :)Comment: albvf9 :) , :)
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#308856* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag Âñå, âûõîæó 15 íîÿáðÿ çàìóæ. Ïîçäðàâüòå ìåíÿ! Çàõîäèòü òåïåðü ê âàì ðåäêî áóäóComment: Âñå, âûõîæó 15 íîÿáðÿ çàìóæ. Ïîçäðàâüòå ìåíÿ! Çàõîäèòü òåïåðü ê âàì ðåäêî áóäó
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Syswear: Geek & Gamer T-shirts. Discount code QDBREADER
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#308929* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag When i hear you say "I LOVE YOU" its hard to understand
... but when i hear it from your heart, its a whole different meaning.Comment: My 1st Quote
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#309184* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag doors.txt;5Comment: doors.txt;5
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#309189* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag doors.txt;10Comment: doors.txt;10
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#309238* (?/10) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag [00:43:35] <segin> Does Lubuntu perform compositing by default?
[00:43:42] <Unit193> Nope.
[00:43:46] <segin> Thank God.Comment: #lubuntu on freenode
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#309256* (?/14) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Mead> !quiet Briman
=-= Mode #Direwolf20 +q *!*@108-89-145-143.lightspeed.cicril.sbcglobal.net by zsh
<Briman> O_O
<Briman> i'm voiced |
#309270* (?/12) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag "The personal gain in achieving your goals is not nearly as significant as the impression left in the minds of your children." - Warren Bohler |
#309273* (?/20) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Maloo-MF9> I've spent so much time playing switch
<Maloo-MF9> that I don't really notice.
<Maloo-MF9> As I said, I'm fairly ambidextrous. Not completely, but I can specialize pretty much anything on either hand with practice. |
#306085* (?/45) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag ��������
,Comment: USA
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#307029* (?/65) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag VoeAoU upzbkosg zleabpgd gxvbeumjComment: VoeAoU upzbkosg zleabpgd gxvbeumj
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#307219* (?/49) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag nxeknnki fmhgmxug yszennmfComment: USA
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