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#311345 (-93/187) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< o11c> Is there any portable function to convert an integer to a string in a signal handler? `s[n]prinf` is *not* on the list of async-signal-safe functions ...
< izabera> there is but you're not gonna like it
< izabera> write is safe, fork is safe, execve is safe
Comment: od -t d4
#309822 (-92/160) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< wushin> I just think client-facing it's like slapping someone in the face with a paper bag full of poo
< Fother> How so?
< wushin> idk, I just use graphic analogies
#311534 (-92/238) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<GargajCNS> so i was looking at my VR headset and realized
<GargajCNS> my parents always told me not to sit close to the TV, and now in 2017 i'm literally jamming TVs into my eyes
#303236 (-91/231) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<jkalex05> my grandma jogs with me
<jkalex05> and she runs ubuntu
<jkalex05> ftw
<jkalex05> she says windows are for carebears
<jkalex05> that made me lol
#306380 (-91/229) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<kingsly> my tampon feels weird
<Cassy> You're a girl?
<kingsly> no
<kingsly> wait are those things only for girls??
Comment: #mugglenet on irc.mugglenet.com
#300943 (-90/444) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Party> I have a furry magazine, one I keep just for them
<Party> .223
#299672 (-89/245) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Leitari> omg
<Leitari> king kong is long
<Leitari> ^^
<Leitari> my ass hurts
<Leitari> wait
<Leitari> that didnt sound right
#309437* (?/96) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
I belong to poo
Poo belongs to pee
You're my queeeeefshaaaaart!
#310541* (?/107) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
SuperGuy
I hate kids that think that putting peanut butter on your balls and having your dog lick it off isn't cool. &#65279;
Alex Lasson
dogs are overrated, for best results i would recommend a snake that can unhinge it's jaw to fit your whole genitalia in its mouth&#65279;
SuperGuy
+Alex Lasson but I wouldnt have use for that because i have the genitals of a 4 year old Norwegian homeless boy :/ Any advice?&#65279;
Alex Lasson
+SuperGuy hmm hard to say...i'll need some pics to analyze in my lab for further...research&#65279;
SuperGuy
+Alex Lasson do you have a blackpeoplemeet.cum profile? Can send them through their&#65279;
Alex Lasson
+SuperGuy no but i have an account on jewishpedophiles.edu&#65279;
SuperGuy
+Alex Lasson I cant join that, my nose is to small.&#65279;
Alex Lasson
+SuperGuy well played sir, i tip my fedora to you
#302518 (-84/114) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Allen: if anything, I'll have to wait until after I file my income tax
Lindsay: ...............................................................
Lindsay: you do realize that all due by thursday, right? lol.
Allen: yeah, I'm thinking of filing on Wednesday
Lindsay: lol
Allen: probably Thursday morning, but Thursday evening isn't outside of the realm of possibility
Lindsay: you are the epitome of lazy
Allen: no, I am the epitome of procrast
#311453 (-84/94) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Talgie> I think at -50 votes, the comment gets removed... YES THAT MEANS YOU BASH
#304182 (-82/204) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Erasmus> So advertising homeopathy is now illegal?
<@Erasmus> Or other quacky things.
<@Sebas> "Buy my ducks!"
* @Sebas gets arrested
#310543* (?/105) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
"STOP DIETING and LEARN HOW TO EAT"
#310729 (-81/135) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< wushin> I'm freaking out.
< MadCamel> Why?
< wushin> I accidentally sold a theater to my neighborhood and they are buying it.
#300804 (-80/334) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<superlou> What's the difference between a violin and a viola?
<Kage_Jittai> superlou: what?
<superlou> Viola burns longer
<generic> Moon_Doggy: Wow
-*- Moon_Doggy prepares sniper rifle
-*- Moon_Doggy takes careful aim at the stage superlou stands on
-*- generic gives the signal
-*- superlou bends over to pick up glass of water.
-*- Moon_Doggy aims at superlou
-*- superlou stands up
-*- generic readies the signal
-*- superlou uses teleport
<Moon_Doggy> damn
<generic> D:
#309481* (?/118) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<swight> hmmm, piss of god, or have a burger...
#301421 (-77/163) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<CinMax> had angiogram, nothing is blocked. they just do not know....
<CinMax> they had to shave my nuts :(
<Von_Ruff> So you still don't know anything, but your balls are hairless now?  I'd say a definite decline since we last talked.
#302029 (-75/221) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<celti> Fuck, my cigarette burnt down to my toes.
<jules> don't you mean fingers?
<celti> No, I mean toes. I was smoking with my toes so I didn't get ash in the keyboard.
<jules> WTF
#300490 (-70/168) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Palantyre> If a lycanthrope becomes a merchant, will he be known as a warewolf?
<Ce`Nedra> *grins* yes
<Palantyre> Okay, just checking ;P
#310126 (-68/172) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<schuko> i've had my share with C working with embedded software
<schuko> it's like star wars
<schuko> you shave off a few bytes and then there's a new hope
<schuko> then you run the test suite and the empire strikes back
Comment: #/g/sicp on Rizon
#310542* (?/75) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<kerin> sinkpissing dongloaders are trying to shit up the fuck
<jrvc> kerin, are you drunk
<kerin> no
<kerin> i�m angry
<kerin> because i�m still typing shit on this tinyass goddamn laptop instead of my giantass goddamn desktop with two fucking monitors and more RAM than god
<kerin> fucking fedex drivers are probably parked somewhere slurping down dick rollups and doing reacharounds
<kerin> fantasizing about UPS driver shorts
#301367 (-64/216) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<RangerRick> OK, really people.  The hitler subtitle mashups are just not funny anymore.  I don't care how funny you think it is, the 30th variant is just not amusing.  You're too late, find a new meme!
<@bbraun> so, you're the hitler of hitler subtitle mashups?
<RangerRick> I think it's fair to say that the meme was pre-Godwin'd.
<chandler> yeah, but is there a hitler subtitle mashup making fun of hitler subtitle mashups making fun of hitler subtitle mashups yet?
<chandler> if not, then insufficient metairony
<gh1> recursive self-Godwinism?
<gh1> people could be hurt...
<dre^> we call that hitlerecursion, aka SIGHEIL
#172905 (-63/163) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<AgentRenegade> i think im gonna love my new highschool class^^
<AgentRenegade> during a lecture a boy suddenly stood up and yelled "Its 13:37, its 1337 time!!"
#308419 (-62/130) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Kelso> I try my best to avoid myself.
#304239 (-60/212) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Bananobot> It crashed AGAIN
<Bananobot> I thought the whole point of Java's freaking annoying over-verbosity was so it could detect errors before deployment or at least before crashing
<Bananobot> It's like, "Yay, everything's working fine, Cap'n! Smooth sailing! Lalala ABANDON SHIP!"
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