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#48752 (364/532) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<RiPz> my uni has signs up in text and in braile
<RiPz> hlf the signs re just printed though
<RiPz> so theyre's just series of dots
<RiPz> in braile configurtion
<RiPz> but its still flat
#54010 (349/509) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Sara> I've discovered that there are certain things that I just can't say without people saying "No, it's just not right when you say it"
<Sara> Like I'm too nice and innocent or something :/
<The_Taped_Crusader> sara
<Sara> hmm?
<The_Taped_Crusader> just imagine your dad saying "lol hax" and you'll understand.
<Sara> Oh god
Comment: dchub://404hub.no-ip.com
#59779 (438/644) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[@turk]: i was in math class today and we were doing equations that allow us to decide the best price for a certain product
[@turk]: with a given amount of production cost, employee salaries, etc
[@turk]: so, the teacher asks, how can we minimize the production costs
[@turk]: someone yells out:
[@turk]: hire mexicans
#69899 (418/612) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<willy> when i say POS it means parents over shoulder. which means no cussing. got it?
***
<willy> ugh, POS.
<foonisha> WOOO PORN FUCK DAMN SHIT TITTIES BOOBS GOD DAMN FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT
*willy has signed off
#74646 (457/671) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@zeleftikam> man, i am so dumb. you know how sometimes food makes a popping sound in the microwave?
<@zeleftikam> well i was microwaving something
<@zeleftikam> and after a minute or so
<@zeleftikam> it made a pop
<@zeleftikam> and im like
<@zeleftikam> ah well
<@zeleftikam> food does that
<@zeleftikam> then it started going fucking crazy with pops
<@zeleftikam> like almost constantly
<@zeleftikam> and i got freaked out and ran over to the microwave
<@zeleftikam> then i remembered i put in popcorn.
Comment: #null
#30938 (363/531) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Caffeine> i was dared to go buy lube
<Caffeine> so i went with my best friend/housemate and talked about double ended dildos while hugging her in the checkout line with ky in my hand
<Caffeine> the cashier asked me 'how was your day'
<Caffeine> i said 'it will be better once i get this hunny home'
<Caffeine> her jaw dropped
Comment: Caffeine is female.
#27407 (345/503) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kweeky> Heh. :P
*** Quits: HotPants
<Kweeky> I have some good stuff in there. :P
*** Quits: MiniReapa
<Kweeky> lol. On every single sentence I said, someone quit. :P
*** Quits: `Horn
<VA_Pel> should we tell him to stop talking, or to talk more?
<Kweeky> ...
<VA_Pel> and the spell is broken
<Kweeky> I didn't say anything, that's why. >:P
*** Quits: Isojalka
#27379 (374/546) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dareon> It hasn't loaded all the way yet, but there better be a schoolgirl at the end of those tentacles.
<Dareon> ...Wrong window. >_<
<Zephy> lmao
#153558 (108/152) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<evad> I just picked up "Learning Python" from our bookshelf.
<Skimble_Work> That would be cool. A snake that you wrap around you, and it imparts knowledge.
<ka> and then crushes you to death
<evad> sounds like Python to me
#211187 (460/674) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<HoodrowTrillson> You say -I- have internet badass syndrome? At least I can insult someone without involving genitals or homosexuality you cock-sucking faggot.
#265040 (394/576) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(floorislava) i'm going to start sleeping on the floor
(FlyingMariachi) but the floor is lava
(floorislava) OH SHIT
#280960 (86/120) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Yan: This one time i was at a girlfriend's house
Yan: Spent the night there and everything went well
Yan: It was like 11:30 and we were in her basement and i was tired as hell so i told myself ill nap for like 30 minutes and then leave
Yan: I woke up and it was like 7:30 am. So i wake the girl up, she freaks out and asks why the fuck am i still home. She then tells me to leave and get out quick by the window.
Yan: Great idea except i had this oldschool Datsun 510 track ready that was so fucking loud i couldnt leave with it.
Yan: She wakes her parents up and tells them i slept over and nothing happened bla bla. Her dad comes out of the bedroom.
Yan: This guy is BIG ex military deep voice just plain scary. Looks at me and says "hey come to breakfast with us" i of course just wanna bounce. He insists and says "whats wrong? Had too much desert last night?"
Yan: I don't even know how i left after that.
#306310 (237/345) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<oughts> My finger is vibrating periodically.
<oughts> Like a phone.
<halifax> Ring finger?
#306378 (82/114) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
dcNate2: wow the UN says internet access is a human right?
Crispy`: dcNate2: Yep./
dcNate2: free internet for all?
Crispy`: well
Crispy`: I have a dream
Crispy`: that one day, we will break free from the chains of oppression
Crispy`: all of God's children
Crispy`: DSL users
Crispy`: cable users
Crispy`: satellite internet users
Crispy`: will be united as one under an internet that imposes no caps!
Crispy`: No restrictions! no limits! No censorship nor greedy corporate owners!
Crispy`: We are all free and equal under the tubes!
dcNate2: judge me not by my ISP, but the QoS of my connection!
#307532 (107/151) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hegemonicon> Is there a rule34 equivalent to science fiction: "If an idea exist someone has written a sci-fi story about it"?
<dontmindme> wouldn't rule 34 contain such rule?
<hegemonicon> Ah so sort of like "What if a spaceship found a planet made of solid gold? Oh, someone wrote a story about that, also there's fucking".
<dontmindme> exactly
#310054 (73/101) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@dmd> two old people were arguing over whose car a car was
<@dmd> and one was demonstrating that their key worked
<@dmd> and the other was using the impeccable argument that "it looks like my car"
<@dmd> i was at a stop light so i had to leave
<@dmd> but i assume this was resolved either by the correct party getting in and driving away
<@dmd> or by thunderdome
#83239 (271/395) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<K3> Damn it my geekdom is seeping into my real-world life.
<K3> I just called a mechanic and told him I was having trouble booting up my car.
#148598 (418/614) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<LordLicorice> I made Goatse talk once
<LordLicorice> In a Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> There was some Budweiser thing
<LordLicorice> where you could upload your portrait
<LordLicorice> and assign eye points, lip points, etc.
<LordLicorice> and make yourself say things
<LordLicorice> so I uploaded Goatse
<LordLicorice> made him talk
<LordLicorice> chose Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> made him recite scripture about the End Times
#188547 (265/385) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Technocactus> It was actually better when my dad found my porn than when he found out I watched Oprah.
#218759 (265/385) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dapho> we have so much in common
<dapho> he's always either playing wow or reading fantasy novels
<dapho> and I'm always either feeling sorry for myself or reading fantasy novels
#265316 (448/662) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
xskycrasherx: ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: BLACK PRESIDENT
#295009 (452/666) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<airstrike> what do you reply to 'your kiss was still the best kiss i ever had'?
<airstrike> or most amazing, w/e
<MattTS> "Leave me alone dad..."
#295307 (67/93) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Francis: Someday, I'm going to rule the internet with an iron fist
Duo: not with a name like Francis.
Duo: more like a delicately manicured, leather-gloved hand
StoneCypher: lightly perfumed
Duo: and lotioned.
#296560 (177/255) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+triBe> (URL to a SourceForge project)
<@whfsdude> Worksafe?
<+triBe> is sourceforge ever not worksafe?
<+aegis> if you work for MS
Comment: irc.mozor.net #mozor
#302082 (475/699) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kolin> just googled myself and my dad no longer comes before me
<rye`sky> it's more romantic if you come at the same time
<Kolin> thats sick
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