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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..393394395396397398399..599Next> |
#2119 (63/235) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<krayons> 95% of the girls at rutgers university in new jersey
<krayons> have stds
<killspree> haha
<killspree> no way
<kara> bullshit man
<killspree> no wonder their basketball and football teams suck so bad
<krayons> its not bullshit
<VeRrUcKt> lol
<killspree> the players are running around in pain |
#2266 (79/301) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dregan> 3y3 4m l33t h4x0r
<Dregan> j0! 3y3 4m t4lking to j00!
<Dregan> fux0red 5cr1pt k1dd13.
<Dregan> -"l33t h41ku" |
#2574 (77/293) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<blazemore> i don't even know who the beatles are
<blazemore> except for jay leno and that other guy that just died |
#3939 (69/259) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Chaz> How the hell it went through a folded-over (two layers) sock is beyond me...
<Nyphur> ... o_0 |
#4356 (78/300) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<teu> I have to admit, when I first suggested anal sex to my girlfriend, she looked at me like I was crazy. I offered to double-wrap, use plenty of AstroGlide, but she was still totally freaked over the idea of it. Then she made a deal with me: If I'd bend over for her strap-on, she'd bend over for me. We take turns taking it up the poop chute, and now we finally feel like our relationship is fully equal |
#5614 (75/284) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<quatoria> you shat on your daughter? disgusting pervert.
<Plaid> No, you freak. I puked on her. |
#7590 (75/284) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** Signoff: iyeoh (Connection reset by peer)}
*** ieyoh has joined #mpeg3c
<iyeoh> WHO EVER PEER IS...YOU FUCKING LOW LIFE BASTARD MOTHERFUCKER OF A RTEENAGE WANKER, BEND OVER SO YOUR HALF FATHER CAN SCREW YOU IN THE ASS TILL YOUR BUTT OOZES FUCKING BLOOD |
#10481 (70/263) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jej> i need to "find" a copy of q3a for os 9/X too.
<jej> and wolfenstein.
<Toast> I need to "find" a copy of "your mom" for "my wang"
<jej> ":("
<cj_> "hehe" |
#151396 (36/130) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Garrett> I was speaking with a student the other day, he was all like, "One thing I like about being a student? I get a week vacation man! I'm sitting at home, playing video games, watching porn, sleeping in, while you, you my friend, you gotta go to work."
<Garrett> and I said, "sure. But while you're watching porn, playing games, and so on, I'm making $600." |
#299783 (73/277) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ctburley> bacardi grand melon tastes like something
<ctburley> but watermelon it does not.
<ctburley> however
<ctburley> the burps taste like watermelon |
#302273 (95/369) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< unrealun1verse> i sometimes wonder if theres some disease that makes you want to do your mum jokes all the time
< fbstj> whatever it is, he probably caught it off your mum :P |
#36682 (48/170) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Rjx sets mode: +o utopian
* Rjx sets mode: -o utopian
<+utopian> if ophood was like sex, I have just been flashedComment: #geekissues
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#43192 (56/206) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Iconoclastic> i just took like
<+Iconoclastic> 6 hits of catnip
<+Lester> and?
<+Iconoclastic> my lungs hurt |
#33676 (74/282) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dingle> i look like a huge penis with my head shaved |
#45697 (51/187) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Mephistol> man
<Mephistol> i just got the best revenge on my brother
<Mephistol> he narced me to my mom over leaving dirty shit in teh sink
<Mephistol> now he has to lube up the dog's cock
<Mephistol> take that, fucker.
<AvgJoe> wtf?
<Mephistol> i told u i was hardcoer
<AvgJoe> why were the words lube, dog, and cock used in the same sentence?
<Mephistol> the dogs fucked.. oscar, the male, jsut got ass
<Mephistol> so his red cock is sticking out past the foreskin
<Mephistol> and if it doesn't recede, the foreskin will act as a tournequet, and cut off blood flow
<Mephistol> and lead to amputation of the cock head
<Mephistol> so to combat that, the exposed penis needs to be lubed up to slide back in
<Mephistol> that's where my brother comes into play
<Mephistol> YEAH, NARC ME MOTHER FUCKER, AND HAVE TO LUBE UP THE DOG COCKComment: irc.stileproject.com #stile
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#50168 (115/463) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Montag> "Ubuntu" is an ancient African word, meaning "I can't configure Slackware".Comment: Thats what Ubuntu means...
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#50343 (69/259) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<polpotpie> Guy came into the photo store today to pick up a roll we had developed.
<polpotpie> He goes, “I have no idea what’s on this roll.”
<polpotpie> I said with a smile, “Sir, sometimes those can be the best ones!”
<polpotpie> He replies, “My son was killed in a car crash 2 weeks ago and this roll was in his car.”
<polpotpie> C’est la vie. |
#59810 (121/483) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
«Matt743434» My old name Matt74343 is banned from this room. I have to now use Matt743434
«@Trunks» ...
«@Trunks» you're not banned.
«@Trunks» you twit.
«Matt743434» My name Matt74343 is
«@Trunks» no, it isn't.
«@Trunks» the only name banned is "bigtitties"
«@Trunks» so, is your name "bigtitties"?
«Matt743434» no
«@Trunks» then you're not banned.
«@Trunks» idiot.
«Matt743434» Hey watch it.
«@Trunks» watch what? you display your ignorance?
«Matt743434» am i ignoring someone?
«@Trunks» ... |
#78 (120/486) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AlmtyBob> I think they should make 'Powerpuff Girls: 2012', a live action movie, where the powerpuff girls are played by mad hot chicks
<AlmtyBob> teenage chicks |
#1384 (62/232) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<iMike> well so long as your penis is alright
<D1> whats a penis without hands??? |
#2382 (69/261) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(Pro_Mark) dOkTeR-- i jerked three times today
(tp9com) i think doin it in the morn fuggs u up
(ackbar) its because once youve ejaculated for the day theres no point in even being alive |
#2805 (69/261) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<LrdZombie> So last night my sister comes in and wants to borrow a dvd. She goes "What do you have that I'd like?" and i go, "Well, I got Goonies, Dark Crystal, and Adventures of Baron Munchausen." She goes "I just saw goonies. Which is better, dark crystal or baron munchausen?"
<_Shorty> haha
<LrdZombie> "Do you want to sleep tonight?" "Yes." *hands her baron munchausen.*
<blazemore> tsk tsk.. laughing before the punch line |
#4170 (76/290) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<morte> Jesus Peanut Butter Cups: Little pieces of the Son of God in a milk chocolate cup! There's no wrong way to eat a Jesus! |
#12131 (68/257) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@D-rage> i'm burning cds like a madman. heh
<@dithi> how many backstreet boys cds do you really need? |
#13887 (65/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BlackNovember> Yesterday when I woke up I found my missing Borknagar CD under my pillow.
<WinterDemon> Yeah, that's the "Cum residue on your hand fairy"s way of repaying you for the left over man juice on your hand after you finished beating off and passed out with your hand under the pillow.
<BlackNovember> Whoa, so if i jerk off tonight and put my hand under my pillow, I'll wake up with a Rotting Christ album under it?
<WinterDemon> Yes, but not the album with a bonus disc, that would be too greedy |
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