|
TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..385386387388389390391..599Next> |
#28800 (91/327) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<gixxerca> Read Romans 1:26-32 to learn more about same sex relationships.
<DNAspark99> ummmm, no. fuck that. go out an be GAY yourself, if you REALLY want to learn more about same-sex relationships.
<gixxerca> Please spare 2 minutes of reading to learn the truth?
<DNAspark99> "truth" found in the bible? |
#29328 (66/226) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<egon> check out, and turn in old keys, and that's the end of the old apartment..
<DJ-Pyro> burn it to the ground
<egon> I think it's worse to leave it back to the landlords |
#30792 (91/321) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
«%Jeeba» One time my dad made me close my eyes and suck some mollasses out of a hose, Still dont know why though. |
#159501 (216/808) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Starlights59: dude
Starlights59: i just got rickrolled by fucking drugs
Starlights59: i'm under the influence of stuff right and then like
Starlights59: out of nowhere
Starlights59: rickroll starts playing in my head |
#218226 (89/315) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
joe9512357846: Its bad when I turn down porn to read quotes...
VollerRoterMond: yeah
joe9512357846: is that why people have dual screen monitors...?
VollerRoterMond: possibly.
VollerRoterMond: you have to train your eyes to look at one screen each
VollerRoterMond: and then your body to laugh and orgasm at the same time.
joe9512357846: lol
joe9512357846: thats pretty awesome...
VollerRoterMond: I'm pretty sure its part of some buddhist religion
joe9512357846: wait - you mean to tell me I have to trick my body into thinking it's actually doing two things at once? Dude we all know how hyperthreading went!!
VollerRoterMond: a skill known only by monks who have been studying the science for their entire life.
VollerRoterMond: I think they're called IT guys or something
VollerRoterMond: fuck... did we both just turn that into nerd jokes? |
#300814 (128/470) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jenna>sometimes i seriously hate my name yknow?
<jenna>like other people are jen or jenny or jennifer, and i'm jenna. with an a. it sounds weird. i hate it i hate it i hate it
<pat>yeah, people pat me on hte head when they leave. and then walk of chucklling, "no pun intended".
<jenna>LOL...not as bad as mine though, i have to say "argh" at the end of my name. jenargh.
<pat>why did mum have to give us shitty names
<jenna>i know eh...
<pat>hm why are we talking over irc when we live in the same house?
<jenna>yeah all this computer shit is getting to our heads. we need some fresh air. what happened to max? who's turn issert for walking him?
<pat>dad's
<jenna>oh
<jenna>well i reckon we should get some fresh air, afk our comps and talk irl
<jenna>but its too much effort getting up and going downstairs and out, farkkkkkk.
<pat>llol im outside on the picnic table with the supposed fresh air, i dont have to go anywhere.
<jenna>fuck you. |
#305949 (31/97) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Profane> my right hand aches
<@Profane> from using the touchpad for hours
<@Profane> >:(
<@Profane> stupid fiddly powerpoint
<@Riocaz> Yea "touchpad"...
<+goat> "powerpoint" |
#307980 (24/72) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Stars> man I always feel bad when I install X on a new system :(
<+Stars> it's like I am ruining it |
#220553 (67/233) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Grim: I'm gonna go shower though
Grim: I'll be back later
Dexi: wtf? since when do you shower!?
Grim: shut up! it's the 30th
Grim: that's always when I do it |
#2381 (66/226) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Spyre-> the beers just sit there, silently staring, and mocking the mistakes my animal mind makes sometimes |
#2472 (72/251) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ArAgOn__> Dyckert: If your parents got divorced, would they still be cousins? |
#2941 (72/252) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<BlackDeth> the only effect cocaine really has is it makes you want more cocaine :D |
#6387 (71/248) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<yabba> I fucked a homeless man today
<xsneakerx> was he cute?
<yabba> no.. but he had no shoes... and his feet were clean.
<yabba> I think he may have been jesus. |
#6935 (79/278) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<rayena> Oh great.. I'm covered with salad again
<michael> Lesbian salad wrestling, on the next Jerry Springer |
#8511 (74/258) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<dr_rotcod> i wonder if my life sucks cause i jerk off after i pray |
#40952 (74/256) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Goremageddon> the funniest thing i did was when we did this cath on an obese lady
<@Goremageddon> i was gonna do an endoscopy thru a urethrea on a obese lady
<@Goremageddon> and i couldnt find her urethra
<@Goremageddon> lol
<@Goremageddon> so i kept shoving the tube in and out
<@Goremageddon> and she started to moan
<@Goremageddon> my friend just said
<@Goremageddon> "oh my god dude"
<@Goremageddon> dude i mean i was trying to do the cath rright
<@Goremageddon> so i kept putting it in and out outta her pussy
<+Fleshing> ROFL
<@iTERATiON> this is making my trip happyComment: #blackdeath-cult
|
#41956 (59/201) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@zeleftikam> yeah so on friday i installed this hard-disk MP3 player in the trunk on this new passat
<@zeleftikam> i think, while i was upside down in the trunk, my cell phone fell out of my pocket, and i sealed it in the trunk trim
<@zeleftikam> it's GONE
<@mitch> ha
<@mitch> nice work
<@zeleftikam> thx |
#60729 (97/349) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<c-rOCK> you cant give blood if youve had buttsex with a man since 1976 though doesnt that disqualify you
<Catcher> haha
<Catcher> giving or receiving?
<jestuh> busted.
<Catcher> DAMN |
#63513 (99/357) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<RMD> hulk hogan is apparently gonna be there.
<Diddgery> hulk hogan !?!?!?!?!
<Terusama> why would Hulk Hogan be at a Pokemon festival o.o
<Terusama> that's weird
<Diddgery> POKEMON TRAINER HULK HOGAN wants to fight!!
<Apophis> He probably thinks he gets to beat the hell out of them himself.
<Diddgery> HULK HOGAN sent out HULKHOGAN
<Diddgery> HULKHOGAN used BODY SLAM
<Diddgery> It's super-effective!
<RMD> MEGA PUNCH
<RMD> GLARE
<RMD> SUBMISSION
<RMD> uh
<Diddgery> haha perfect |
#16740 (59/202) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* DiscoFever ignores all you dicks
<Joelz> Good.
<Joelz> You shouldn't be looking at our penises anyway. |
#19038 (61/207) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Amira_nu> hey nothing wrong with loving G-d both ways
<Melech> loving god both ways sounds rather kinky |
#27944 (62/218) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<tmoenk> Alan Grimes..
<tmoenk> People have said that i have an infinite supply of patience.
<tmoenk> Alan Grimes spent infinity in just four days. |
#28825 (79/279) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Random-Guy> Hello? Is anyone there? I did it! I'm the last #finalfighter alive! *Spills his hand lotion* That...that's not fair. There was time now! |
#31095 (79/279) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<killfile> Why on earth would you want children at all?
<jedi_antwerp> i'd like to know that after i've banged a girl i've ruined her life, tooComment: #plainsofhotha on slashnet via fpm
|
#14787 (72/254) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<colrebel> i hate it when a coworker spots you blowing the contents of your
nostrils into a trash can |
|
save page |
share: reddit
stumbleupon
digg
facebook
twitter
tumblr
<Prev1..385386387388389390391..599Next> |
|