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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..166167168169170171172..599Next> |
#7030 (174/316) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Adar> "If you handle an envelope and some white powder spills out, you should _____________?"
<Boog|Happy> "Sniff it?" |
#8757 (216/399) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kurt> Good day prospective employer, I am both smarter than a hatful of periwinkles and prettier than two bags of smashed assholes. Fail to employ me at your own risk. |
#9081 (221/405) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Spin: arrrr, pirates of the south west
Spin: thar be large pipes o'bandwith near ye'ol univarsety.
Pirate: yearg, ye may be an ta somethan thar.
Spin: what say ye we pull yonder USB hard disk longside yonder NMSU puter and begin tha lutin and plunderin.
Pirate: yearg. The master done gaved me a testin machine with a grand ol CDR.
Pirate: Avast!
Pirate: MP3s off the starboard bow!
Spin: stere clear of ye porn pop ups rollin in from tha east.
Pirate: I have mah trusty Opera browsa to help me fend em off.
Spin: encrypt the data holds, batton down thar security patches, argh thar be spyware abound. |
#9152 (225/413) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Wampa> Screw the little children of the world
<Falcon24> ok
<ROFISH> he didn't mean that literally falc |
#10131 (150/269) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<!5_DeR> you didnt just read what one guy on a forum said and accepted it as truth
<NoDamage> yes i have
<NoDamage> i find the internet to be pretty reliable |
#11727 (195/355) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Aboshi> Women. I drive 'em crazy.
<Trinity> crazy = away |
#11780 (182/332) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<MED1C> i bet they got their degree from the same vending machine |
#33289 (232/426) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<WorkDug> OMG
<WorkDug> mcdonald's is phasing out supersize phrise!!
<WorkDug> jesus .. did i really just type "phrise"?Comment: #GeekIssues on EFNet
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#34674 (246/452) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dmose> remember, it's all fun and games until someone shrieks "WRONG HOLE!" |
#36680 (189/345) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<t|to> mmm pound of weed
<Dmi> mmmmm, sexy girl at work whose ass is rocking like a ship out there in the deep blue sea during a thunderstorm
<Dmi> my network admin just imed me. he's like "Yeah, man, she *does* have a great ass" |
#38204 (157/285) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Alien> i'm married whee
* Alien runs back to the partyComment: IRC Addict....
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#38280 (142/256) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Mech> wow 8th grade was so long ago
<Mech> so many memories.
* Mech represses them again. |
#38623 (139/251) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nyschashi-Seikun> i ate at black anus, there meat is so shitty
<Nyschashi-Seikun> *angusComment: #stickcat@ irc.stickserv.net
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#43695 (171/311) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SpazLink> Dyslexic?
<Kederaji> Why is that word so bloody hard to spell?
<Kederaji> It's like it's taunting them.
<Kederaji> "Guess what, you're dyslexic, and you'll never be able to spell it!"Comment: esper.net #C&T
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#43722 (167/303) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Volante> so here's today's laundry lesson...
<Volante> don't wash a feather pillow in a washing machine
<Beckka> yeah
<Beckka> feathers come out
<Volante> feathers EVERYWHERE....
<Volante> layers upon layers of feathers
<Volante> it looks like a flock of ducks flew into the garage and summarily exploded |
#44162 (233/427) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<&Segosa> :(
<+Mikal> Turn that frown upside down.
<&Segosa> ):Comment: #sysnode @ irc.sysnode.org
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#46314 (164/298) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Jaeger2288: well its tired ok im late
longlivemarneus: lol
Jaeger2288: or whatever i meant to say just then |
#47238 (225/413) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<vex> so about half an hour ago i took my medication and when i was washing it down with some water i started coughing
<vex> and two minutes ago i sneezed and one of the capsules i took flew out of my nose |
#50085 (234/430) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Asaga> holy crap, Elec's a girl1?
<CtrlAltDestroy> no, she's a girl2
<Asaga> XD
<Asaga> is anyone here a girl3?
<CtrlAltDestroy> Girl3 hasn't been released yet, still in beta stages
<Asaga> oh
<Asaga> beta testing the new version of girl?
<Asaga> Girl 3.0
<CtrlAltDestroy> It's done really good in tests, but there are still a few problems
<Asaga> I hope they fixed the Period bug |
#51533 (187/341) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<val1s> anyone know any hassidik jewish porn websites i can redirect my old companies website to? |
#52979 (175/317) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<matr1x> the name gaylord means "brave strength " in old french
<Luigi30> matr1x: it means "homosexual god" in modern english |
#33711 (186/340) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Neon[UK]> i'm starting a successful online business
<Neon[UK]> and im 17
<Neon[UK]> so fuck you all
<Neon[UK]> apart from rjx
<Rjx> heh
<Rjx> you can't _start_ a succesful business
<Rjx> you get that status after a few years |
#33713 (223/411) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+x24[java]> damnit. i just cheesed my fresh from the drier pants
<@BalefireX> cheesed?
<+x24[java]> a macaroni escaped from the fork and left it's mark with cheese on my pants
<@BalefireX> ah
<@BalefireX> just checking it wasnt slang for defecationComment: #gideontech
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#33819 (208/382) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Zardoz> Damn those blow-up sheep.
<Zardoz> I got fucking TWO of them for my 21st.
<Zardoz> wtf.
<Zardoz> from DIFFERENT PEOPLE ! |
#34659 (264/488) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<l0y4l153r> i got some questions about developing plugins for your software...
<Segosa> ah, ok, what language?
<l0y4l153r> english |
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