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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..165166167168169170171..599Next> |
#26219 (207/379) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Foxxz> OMG! you know our dorm is nerdy when someone finds a math tv show and we all start watching. |
#29479 (230/422) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Plex: Mom just called to tell me she?s coming home now
Plex: What am I supposed to say to that? ?thanks for letting me know, I'll finish jacking off now"
* Plex is now away: Busy |
#29996 (530/996) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Rad_the_Hedgehog> !seen Jesus
<@DPI> Jesus is on the channel right now (as Ron) !
<+Ron> Oh my dad, I've been discovered. |
#30469 (242/446) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Theogony> odd
<Theogony> one of the playboy playmates kinda looks like my mom
<Theogony> hmm
<Theogony> quite strange |
#33026 (242/446) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Keiron> Yahoo search brings up 24,400,000 hits for "porn"
<@Keiron> google brings up 92,700,000 hits for "porn"
<@Arcturus> Google - 300% more Pornful.Comment: #voices on darkmyst
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#33214 (230/422) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
brihana25: which part of her anatomy did j-lo forget to clothe this year?
fleet: her face
fleet: the ugly bitch |
#102531 (84/148) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<cpux> I just had an epiphany.
<crux> My job as a computer engineer isn't to understand all the inner-workings of technology. Rather, it's to befriend many people who understand all the inner-workings of technology. |
#153537 (288/534) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nyschashi> so I'm reading this george bush hentai manga
<nyschashi> it's pretty great
<nyschashi> Bush and Saddam make peace after they gang bang some random girl
<nyschashi> ;/
<nyschashi> the girl then randomly dropkicks Kim Jong-Il
<nyschashi> I'm skipping through about 30 pages at a time, but it looks like george bush randomly turns into a tentacle demon and rapes a bunch of people |
#156995 (201/367) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Tatsh> in my fantasy house there's going to be a road made of thick glass to drive on
<Tatsh> that's lit with all these colours
<Tatsh> like a mile long track
<Tatsh> of glass
<Tatsh> a real-life rainbow road
<Tatsh> it'll be so sick
<Tatsh> and i would definitely do some shrooms and drive on it |
#204833 (353/657) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< tripletech> do old people really say pew pew pew? i thought that was a 00s thing
<@Fib> tripletech of course, winston churchill himself said in his famous speech "we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, pew pew pew!"
< fansipans> "do not want" was originally a prohibition protest song
< pmv> i thought it was the civil rights movement
< fansipans> pmv no that was can has
< pmv> haha
< fansipans> remember martin luther king's famous speech "i can has a dream" ?
< pmv> i can has cheezeburger was black slang for equal rights
< fansipans> well back in those days cheeseburgers were only served in the "whites only" section of diners
< fansipans> so it really was a rallying cry for many
< pmv> niceComment: #cobol
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#207998 (170/308) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Fudoushin> I must've gotten into the Japanese language for the stupidest reason...
<Fudoushin> I like anime, Japanese video games (RPGs mainly), and manga.
<Fudoushin> So I majored in it in college. Which is really not that far removed from majoring in African-American Studies because you enjoy '70s blaxploitation films... |
#301428 (70/126) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DobyMick> god, inglorious bastards is such a sick movie!
<DobyMick> so what if the "good" guys are jewish and the "bad" guys are nazis, its still violence and murder!
<DobyMick> i mean, how would people feel if someone made a movie where the positions were reversed?
<Fulup>They already did. It's called a documentary. |
#301836 (301/555) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@PZT> "I want you to taste these," she panted as she unbuttoned her blouse, revealing two full-grown California grizzly bears. I was on the ground before it even clicked. I glanced upwards and wove my head to the left as a set of 2" claws plunged downward at me. They grazed the side of my face. It stung like hell. One of them was sitting on my left arm; I couldn't move. I felt around for the coat hanger she'd thrown to the floor just minutes ago. A careless move for an agent, I thought to myself. I twisted it around my wrist, forming a crude hook, and jabbed at the one on top of me. It rolled over, uttering primal groans of agony as blood dripped from its eyes. I slashed blindly to my left. I didn't break the fur, but it was enough. The second bear shifted its weight, and I was able to pry my arm free. Still half-naked, I grabbed the padlocked Armani suitcase and I stumbled out the motel room door.
<Scizor300> What the hell?
* Stoney is now known as Stonaway
<@PZT> I swore silently to myself as I dashed toward the dimly lit lobby. She'd been one of them all along. An agent. The Movement had warned me not to let down my cover, even for a minute. Why hadn't I listened? A prostitute, in the beat-down slums of Madrid? What was I thinking? Her name... Bertha. Bear-tha. She'd been dangling it in front of my face the entire night, but I had been too horny to listen. Or care, for that matter.
<+Mach> What the fuck?
<@PZT> I burst out the front door and ran down the street towards a departing bus. I didn't care where it was going; no human can outrun a hungry grizzly bear on foot. I heard screams behind me, followed by roars and a horrible gnashing sound. I stuck my good arm between the closing doors, pried them open and stepped on board. I threw a few coins at the flabbergasted bus driver and made my way to a seat, ignoring the similarly confused faces around me. It didn't matter to me; the honey was safe. That was all that mattered nowadays.Comment: #armonte's_channel on irc.esper.net
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#301943 (244/452) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<scgtrp> "This License Agreement is effective until terminated."
<scgtrp> NO WAY |
#304921 (69/119) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(DemonHeadx) Anyone know of a minecraft server host that can host about 1$ per player?
(Weltschmerz) A server that can host dollars is called a safe |
#305263 (51/87) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Metafoxi> basically little things like "smoke bong in this town" "give beggar 1 bullet"
<Metafoxi> that last one had me puzzled
<Metafoxi> until i figured out you had to literally give him a bullet, not shoot him with it |
#308363 (105/187) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@lysol> do you guys know about the len() function
<@pyna> yeah but i call it lennie() cause we tight |
#309870 (52/88) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<doublehappy> bomb scare at my work
<doublehappy> S U S P I C I O U S B R I E F C A S E
<doublehappy> we have to leave by the basement door now
<doublehappy> when we leave we have to go via the basement but the driveway goes right past the door where the suspicious briefcase is
<m[at]> as long as you dont taunt the briefcase you'll be fine
<doublehappy> it is an old brown briefcase with a sign saying "FREE" |
#205 (300/554) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(D1) ignore me
(D1) 9 out of 10 women do. |
#227 (274/506) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Amanda`> We're going to have matching motherboards and processors
<timmo> AMANDA: NOW THAT IS THE TYPE OF WEIRD SHIT IM TALKING ABOUT
<timmo> MOST WOMEN WANT MATCHING SHEETS AND SHIT
<timmo> weirdo |
#1323 (218/400) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hypr> ¿
<LkTruth1> hypr is confused in Spanish. |
#1975 (223/409) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<c-rock> Whatever happened to sex drugs and rock n roll? Now we just have aids crack and techno. |
#2213 (189/345) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<purem> my sk00l had an anthrax scare today
<purem> it ended up being some poor guys coke :(
<purem> he's prolly gonna get expelled :/
<purem> or at least kicked outta the faculty
<purem> and then executed
<Morris> haha
<Morris> They mistook some coccaine for anthrax?
<purem> yeah
<Morris> hehe
<Morris> Poor guy
<Morris> All he wanted, was to do his lines.
<purem> ya
<purem> it's bad enough that he lost his coke, but he had to go and quarintine like 600 people into that building for like 4 hours
<purem> heh
<Morris> :/
<purem> rough day
<Morris> Coke heads around the world now lable their coke with "Not Anthrax" stickers.
<purem> "COCAINE INSIDE" |
#3909 (355/661) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BombScare> i should go buy a skateboard and go sk00l some kids at the park
<BombScare> since im an expert at all 3 tony hawk games, i should have no problem pulling off those tricks in real life |
#6326 (172/313) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[during the Olympics]
ted: everytime i load my yahoo it seems the US has three more medals
craig: Stop reloading then!!! Canada has to catch up |
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