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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..138139140141142143144..599Next> |
#23380 (238/419) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Arrgh> hmmm... i need to write my own matrix code
<Harrison> Yes, Arrgh!
<Harrison> Then you can subjugate the entire human population!
<Harrison> Except for a small number of upstarts who'll wind up totally ruining your plans.
<Harrison> One of them will be a terrible actor.
<Arrgh> naw, that has a scale thats much too big
<Arrgh> i'll have to just subjugate all of you gys
<Harrison> Can I be the bad actor?
<Arrgh> i dunno, you need to audition!
<Harrison> Ok ok ok. How's this...
<Harrison> "Whoa."
<Arrgh> you're hired! |
#23831 (192/336) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<|404notfound> Kazaa is like playing Russian roulette, only with porn instead of bullets. |
#24170 (276/488) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[17:12] <SA-PYRoMaNiaC> Lesbians shouldn't be allowed to use dildos. They've made their choice. |
#24191 (177/311) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dewie`> ¡hola!
<patty> buenos noches, tiipsicito
<dewie`> sorry, i should clarify... i don't speak spanish. I just enjoy the inverted punctuation. |
#25129 (170/296) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ignatz> If you piss off enough people, it's hard to tell the difference between a distributed denial of service attack and public opinion. |
#25193 (212/372) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CrazySpence> my moms like "do you have the paper towels" *i hand them over* "I know you use them for jerking off" *laughs and closes the door* |
#25613 (229/403) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* nephlite is listening to korean pop
<Anwar> is it about starcraft?
<nephlite> probably |
#26209 (224/394) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<^KaMaG^> I always use "six letters long" cause the signup form said "Your password MUST be six letters long "! |
#26220 (244/430) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dilbert> my dad owns a company "Incestors inc."
<Dilbert> investors*
<Dilbert> i meant |
#26285 (231/407) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AL9000> I'm gonna make my girlfriend a valentine with the goatse man on it, and it will have a caption that reads "I love you thiiisss much!" |
#26343 (206/360) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ModIWD> these girl scouts on this box almost look old enough
<ModIWD> to uh
<ModIWD> be selling cookies |
#29446 (253/447) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Steele looks at his watch
<Steele> well either its 6:15 or mickey has a hard on |
#30348 (258/456) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* Icy-mu cackles
<Icy-mu> i have discovered why we have halloween
<Icy-mu> its cause vampires like blood
<Icy-mu> and cant eat candy
<+Hamster_Of_Death> and candy companies like money
<Icy-mu> so they get all the childern to go get free candy
<Icy-mu> then the vampires suck the sugar blood outta the childern
<Icy-mu> those fiends
<+r3d3> you know at first that theory sounded like it was going to be stupid, but now it makes sense |
#32124 (230/404) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Jaxed> naw he said he was going to kill me
<Jaxed> and smash a bottle over my head
<Jaxed> and grabbed a plastic vodka bottle
<Jaxed> and i was like dude
<Jaxed> thats plastic |
#32921 (295/523) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Skizot> my boss is a moron
<Skizot> he walked in an i had left mirc open
<Skizot> he asked what it was...
<Berry2K> bussiness relations?
<Skizot> i told him a new support program by microsoft
<Berry2K> :)
<Berry2K> haha
<Skizot> he says" do i need it"
<RightField> lol
<Skizot> i told him no... it's for really techincal people and n00bs
<Berry2K> WTFLOL
<Skizot> he asks what's a n00b
<RightField> omg
<Skizot> i told him that's what they call microsoft programmers |
#82761 (204/358) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<bebop> watch hentai
<bebop> and take notes
<pingu> i was hospitalized once for trying something i saw in a hentai |
#101437 (439/787) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Asuka_Aogiri> I mean, when I pet my cat while she's in heat, I think to myself 'This is the closest I'll get to touching a horny female in my entire life...cool.'
<Shinra> You stroked that hot pussy, eh?
<Josh_Aogiri> ...that's the most disturbing thing you've ever said.
<Asuka_Aogiri> Totally. |
#299777 (270/478) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[ reppie ] to understand electricity you really need to be an ohmosexual |
#305736 (165/287) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Keyla> we had a fun customer today who came in with a very detailed handwritten list of components for a computer he wanted us to build for him
<Keyla> core i5 or i7, 6-8 GB of ram (or maybe 12), 2 hard drives (he specifically requested no raid)
<Keyla> for word processing
<_habnabit> Maybe he wanted to use OOo |
#92 (308/549) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Xavier> if it has 'teen' in the channel name, the collective iq of the group can automatically be assumed to be a negative value |
#153 (272/480) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<watashiwa> I think hypr accidentally joined #invest by mistakenngly typing a v instead of a c. |
#1069 (239/424) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<orion`-`-> what the fuck
<orion`-`-> i think the icecream truck just hit a kid
<orion`-`-> brbrb |
#1293 (230/405) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<l0g1c> Does giving handjobs make you go blind??
<ApOkAliPs> HAHA
<ApOkAliPs> well...
<ApOkAliPs> depends where you aim it... |
#1338 (217/380) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Frodo1234> Although it turns out that "non-toxic" isn't synonomous with "great for snacking" when it comes to toys
<Frodo1234> Even though they say that bubble blowing fluid is non toxic, apparently you're still not supposed to chug it |
#2290 (193/337) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<eldee> finding wiring diagrams on the web isnt fun at all
<eldee> because.. you really dont find any wiring diagrams
<eldee> just porn.. how wiring diagrams and porn can be confused in a search engine, i've yet to discover |
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