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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..114115116117118119120..599Next> |
#51335 (298/500) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<GenericLoser> A kid got detention today in French class.
<GenericLoser> He made a white flag for his project on French art. |
#51585 (247/411) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
blucracksmurf: i tried to read the case study on why windows is more stable than linux, but IE crashed while opening the pdf |
#56199 (251/419) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
madskz: dude i keep typing my password instead of my username for gmail
madskz: so frickin annoying!!
khaos: lol
khaos: wat's ur gmail username anyway?
madskz: tr7321
madskz: FUCK |
#56773 (233/387) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SMarsh> I'd like to point out, for the record, that God made the entire universe in less time than it's taken marq to hire good Perl coders.
<DMM> Yes, but the universe has a simpler syntax than perl. |
#58166 (285/477) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Tael: "two days later my exfiance was all "I know, we can go somewhere you havent been, it will be a surprise..." drives up to hooters and gets out, and says, you'll like it here. We walk in and all the girls say hi to me and give me hugs"
Tael: "I got the DIRTIEST look in the world from her" |
#77492 (279/467) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<big_bob_9> man i just took the SAT
<big_bob_9> im so tired
<krakatau585> haha its really hard isnt it
<beano> thats what your mom said
<big_bob_9> its so long too
<beano> thats what your mom said
<krakatau585> but you still dont have enough time to finish haha
<beano> thats what your mom said
<krakatau585> dude stop before you go too far
<beano> thats what your mom said!
<big_bob_9> rofl |
#13499 (225/374) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Aerion> I haven't rebooted Windows for a week and it still hasn't started leaking memory.
<AndrewT> freaky
<AndrewT> you'd better get that thing to microsoft before it starts becoming useful |
#19994 (160/263) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<yakk> oh fuck
<yakk> I just realised that the "faith based missile defense" wasn't a joke |
#22213 (273/457) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Sinviras: Squeak got himself a g/f
Sinviras: ?
CVYSqueak915: yeah
Sinviras: grats
CVYSqueak915: thanks
Sinviras: what lvl is she?
CVYSqueak915: SHe has no internet
Sinviras: ....
Sinviras: dump her |
#25151 (253/423) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<phatmike> wtf
<phatmike> i dont drink that much
<phatmike> wow
<phatmike> this coffee tastes weird
<phatmike> without the whiskey in it |
#28940 (200/332) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Jay> the only annoying thing about Perl is there's always at least 10 ways to do the same thing =)
<Ashley> and half of those make absolutely no sense when you come back to the code 30 minutes later |
#14817 (210/352) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Ziggy> anyone know where i can download ICQ?
<Assmann> ziggy get on icq ill send it to u
<Ziggy> dude are you a fucking moron? |
#21042 (262/440) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<jbroome> i will be assilimated
<YanceySlide> Or something.
<jbroome> spelled correctly
<YanceySlide> Being assilimated sounds like something that happens in prison.
<jbroome> that would be assmutilated
<YanceySlide> Point. |
#21633 (217/362) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<datamorph> lewsha, we generally call it a lan party because if we call it a substance abuse party we'd get in trouble |
#25123 (208/346) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Mojojojo> omg
<Mojojojo> there was some poo on my bedroom floor
<Sureshot> yours?
<Mojojojo> I DONT FUCKING KNOW |
#28849 (236/398) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<psypete> ooooo!
<psypete> i stepped outta my door and what do i find? a fresh spool of 100 48x CDR's :-)
* rik steps out of his door
* rik finds no spool of cds.
* rik pouts
* danamania peeks out her door too
<danamania> some leaves.
* danamania tries burning them.
<danamania> yup! 48x leaves
<rik> oh. hm. now there is a flatmate there.
* rik waves to flatmate.
* danamania burns flatmate
<rik> * flatmate flickers gently
<danamania> aww. only 2x |
#150929 (241/403) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<gavin|> wtf
<gavin|> I just realized that 2 years ago I paid for a 19" LCD but received a 17"
<gavin|> this is so odd
<gavin|> I'm looking into buying a new monitor
<gavin|> so I look at the current monitor I have
<gavin|> it's a 17"
<gavin|> then I look at my receipt from 2 years ago when I bought it
<gavin|> supposed to be a 19"
<gavin|> I... feel dumb |
#154074 (153/255) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<newnicknamehere> how do I fix it?
<luvlg15> type
<DJPerks> type /nick Phail4Lyfe
<hopefulsemblance> type "/phailatlife"
<cheddarcheese> lol
* newnicknamehere is now known as Phail4lyfe
<hopefulsemblance> there ya go
* Phail4lyfe is now known as Phailatlife
<hopefulsemblance> perfect
<Phailatlife> it doesnt say Samual
<maddemp> niiiice |
#223818 (123/201) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< kupo> i like watching the protester videos
< kupo> but their tactics suck
< kupo> I could finally put all my years of useless turn based strategy games to use |
#262873 (162/268) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Dan> CAPS LOCK: ENGAGED, CAPTAIN. SETTING DESTINATION FOR PLANET COOL.
<pineapple> ARRIVED AT DESTINATION.
<Dan> COOL.
<Foxhill> FAILED TO CLEAR CUSTOMS.
<Foxhill> DEPORTED FOR OWNING PLAID SHIRT. |
#295382 (444/754) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Fualkner> You know, Carry on Wayward Son is one huge innuendo.
<Fualkner> "Carry on wayward son / there'll be peace when you are done"
<Fualkner> "Carry on, nothing equals the splendor"
<Fualkner> Kansas is apparently made up of chronic masturbators
<Pingly> Stop.
<Pingly> STOP.
<jabbers> You just fucking ruined that song for me. |
#296678 (151/249) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<ZeroButte> man, its hard to read trainspotting
<gord-sofa> i dont need to read trainspotting, i saw the movie and grew up in the north of england ;)
<Chickenhen> you mean you can't read the book, as you grew up in north of england, so you watched the movie? |
#303694 (56/88) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<locutox> Thank you for participating GNSS 2010. Your paper "Detection of RF Interference to GPS using day-to-day C/No differences" has been accepted for oral.
<locutox> WOOHOO MY PAPER IS GETTING ORAL |
#304174 (54/84) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Spance> "Certainly Java got a lot right - its used by 10 million developers."
<Spance> THERE ARE 350-500 MILLION CASES OF MALARIA A YEAR
<\> are you arguing that malaria isn't successful? |
#305243 (44/70) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
cmca: so i've been playing starcraft a lot late at night and i think its starting to infiltrate my real life
cmca: me, emi, kyle, and paul were coming back from lunch and we got to the door that requires a key card. and we all just stood there, everyone waiting for someone else to swipe theirs
cmca: and my first thought was "shit, i missed the minerals when i set the rally point for the drones"
rnovel: HAHAHAHAH
cmca: and then i shook myself and swiped my card... |
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