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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random<Prev1..262263264265266267268..596Next> |
#305918* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
sk68: It should connect in a few sleepover
sk68: ..
sk68: Sorry, I was listening to the tv
sk68: *few minutes
sk68: I am NOT watching porn >_>Comment: I was helping someone connect a botnet and watching tv at the same time, not a good idea :/
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#305929* (?/23) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Xerei> so let's play!
<Yokto> Well first you need to make a charcter. After that you need to be introduced :P
<Xerei> New Game - Create a new character - *gives the character a cool look* - connect to server DarkMyst - game on! - *turn on some music*
<Xerei> done
<Yokto> We have both scedualed games and downtime games.
<Yokto> And thats not how you make a charcter. |
#305943* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SIGNED_ENCRYPTED_ANIME_SECRETS> Ubuntu Christian Edition is a free, open source operating system geared towards Christians. It is based on the popular Ubuntu Linux. Ubuntu is a complete Linux-based operating system, freely available with both community and professional support. The goal of Ubuntu Christian Edition is to bring the power and security of Ubuntu to Christians.
<SIGNED_ENCRYPTED_ANIME_SECRETS> The current Ubuntu Christian Edition release supports both 32 bit and 64 bit PCs.
<SIGNED_ENCRYPTED_ANIME_SECRETS> lmao selectively ignoring the prohibition of long mode in leviticus i see
<SIGNED_ENCRYPTED_ANIME_SECRETS> "oh that part doesnt count bc the bible didnt predict that MMX would be deprecated" yea how do u reconcile that with an omniscient god f*cktards |
#305944* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Megago: Have you seen that stupid 'love is blind' quote on QDB?
Zero: Some stupid bitch doesn't know what the phrase means?
Megago: Basically yes.
Zero: Oh, and I see she is also waxing poetic.
Megago: Or trying and failing to, anyway.
Epsilon: I've got an unwritten pathway for her...
Epsilon: IN MY PANTS!
Zero: Epsilon's gonna take miss VanNewkirk to a nice dark place to hide her fear and pain.
Epsilon: Her tears will only make my penis harder.
Epsilon: I don't remember what that's from, but since I've heard it, I have gone out of my way to quote it in context in as many conversations as possible.
Megago: Well done.
Epsilon: I try. |
#305978* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Kashmir: your a horrible person for killin moomoos
Nazaryn: X3
Kashmir: eat dolphins instead
Kashmir: no one cares about dolphins
Nazaryn: I'd be a .. LOL WHAT |
#306000* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
MightyMick: She's like....Syphyllus
MightyMick: You can beat the shit out of her
MightyMick: You can cover her up all you want
MightyMick: But ten years from now
MightyMick: It's gonna' start eating your brain |
#306006* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Foxhill> there is a disease all women get somewhere in their 20s where they think they need to get married and have kids, this is nice and cute and all but severely limits their chances of having bumsex in nightclubs |
#306017* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<LordCyrix> i picked up bad habits shortly afterwards, like working at Microsoft |
#306022* (?/37) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Eins> oh come on, give me a break. All day I act all mature and professional for all my teachers and peers, can't I get away with it at least once?
<Craz-EE> nope
<Eins> T_T thanks Hitler.
<Craz-EE> You just had to bring Godwin's law in here
<Craz-EE> Fucking naziComment: Godwin's law
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#306027* (?/45) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Bwaah> oh
<Bwaah> i could gift you portal on steam
<xOni> Bwaah: I'd suck your dick.
<Bwaah> xOni: steamid now
<xOni> what
<xOni> WHAT.
<xOni> Ummmm
<xOni> UMMMM
<xOni> I FORGET HOLD ON
<xOni> UMMM
<xOni> <steamid>
<Bwaah> WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
<xOni> Oh flup I cant go to my computer my bird is flying around and shiz
<xOni> Zomg.
<xOni> How.
<xOni> Will;.
<xOni> I.
<xOni> Accept.
<xOni> Bwaah: Move to jersey so I can s your d |
#306028* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
(After "Blowjobs For Jesus" is added to the topic)
<@Leah_Vincent> wait wait wait... blowjobs for jesus? where'd that come from?
<@NagatoKyon> It's Palm Sunday
<@NagatoKyon> and I was thinking random thoughts on the way home
<@Steve_Restless> wouldnt that be handjobs for jesus?
<@NagatoKyon> and I thought, "there's a way to get converts, Blowjobs for Jesus"
<@NagatoKyon> Nah, he can actually hand fuck himself
<@NagatoKyon> give him something he can't do to himself you know?
<+Commando_Jane> I'm pretty sure I'm going to hell just for witnessing this.
<@Steve_Restless> no no, in a "for jesus" statement its not that the actions are applied directly to the messiah, but done to win people over for him. THUS given that its Palm sunday, handjobs should be the order of the day
<+Commando_Jane> Point still stands
<@Steve_Restless> Commando_Jane - but... why would this conversation make you /join #minecraft ?Comment: #Chaos_GardenOOC on irc.esper.net
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#306033* (?/33) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<RaZgRiZ> sauerbrater IS offcotpicComment: Lol, from #sauerbraten on QuakeNet
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#306036* (?/41) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* TK has joined the channel
* feepbot welcomes TK (4 / 4): <TK> WHAT IS IT WITH THIS PLACE AND CERVICAL MUCUS!?
<DragonBoots> Channel needs more cervical mucus.
<DragonBoots> It needs, like. A bucket of it. To dump on anyone who says "penis".
* MorkaisChosen dumps cervical mucus on DragonBoots.
<MorkaisChosen> You said penis!
* DragonBoots dumps cervical mucus on MorkaisChosen "So did you!"
<NamelessFragger> DragonBoots: So what do you do to people who say "ovaries"?
* DragonBoots dumps a bucket of semen on NamelessFragger
<NamelessFragger> ...Disgusting. *goes off to cleanse off his powered armor thoroughly* ...Wait, where the hell did you accumulate THAT much semen?
<MorkaisChosen> /Years/ of effort?
<DragonBoots> Nah.
<DragonBoots> I have hundreds of Asian men in my basement jerking it to make Red Rocket pops.
<FishOLight> hot?
<Strife89> ... I'll be over the sink.
<Strife89> Barfing.
<DragonBoots> My work here is done.Comment: Please pass the Brain Bleach.
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#306051* (?/35) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<MasterTT> hi
<MasterTT> hi jamz
* MasterTT slaps jamz around a bit with a large fishbot
<harps> he's angry, and he wants answers!!Comment: #assaultcube@QuakeNet
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#306078* (?/53) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: submisive male looking for dominant mistress
You: SUCK MY CLIT YOU DISGUSTING LITTLE MAN
You: AND WHEN YOU'RE DONE YOU CAN PUT ON A FRENCH MAID'S UNIFORM AND TONGUE MY ASS CLEAN
Stranger: yes mistress
You: PUNCH YOURSELF IN THE BALLS HARD
Stranger: ahhh!
You: I MEAN IT. DON'T FUCK AROUND. HIT THEM HARD AND MAKE IT HURT
Stranger: yes mistress
Stranger: i've done it mistress
You: GO GET A KNIFE AND CUT "MISTRESS'S PROPERTY" INTO YOUR ERECT PENIS
Stranger: AHHHHHHH!
Stranger: ok misress
You: POST A PHOTO OF YOUR PENIS TO f2bbs.com/bbs
You: AND DO IT NOW YOU LITTLE SHIT
Stranger: i dont have a cam
You: USE YOUR MOBILE YOU PATHETIC LITTLE SISSY
Stranger: it doesnt work
You: I DON'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER YOU LITTLE PRICK
You: CALL YOUR MOTHER ON THE PHONE NOW
Stranger: yes mistress
You: TELL HER YOU WANT TO STICK YOUR FINGER IN HER ASS AND TO TWEAK BOTH HER NIPPLES AT THE SAME TIME
Stranger: yes mistress
Stranger: she put the phone down
Your conversational partner has disconnected. |
#306089* (?/37) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Furah> dead chat :/
<@Furah> hi lunix
<@Furah> even the fucking bot isn't talking
<@Digi> HI LINUX
<%Linux> HEY, DIGI
<@Furah> OH SHIT I FORGOT TO CAPS DAT SHIT
<%Linux> AIEOHOIAE
<@Furah> HEY LINUX
<%Linux> GREETINGS, FURAH |
#306121* (?/39) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
HelgeSverre: I SUMMON THE MIGHT MODERATOR SANGUINE!!! *does some sacremental shiz*
Church: he's away atm
HelgeSverre: ...the summoning is just delayed... just lag
k357: High ping to the voodoo server?
HelgeSverre: yeah, they must be under a DoS attack at this point..Comment: OverTheGun.com Chatbox
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#306141* (?/21) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<denysonique> dev-lang/v8... -- '_AND_PROFILING -DENABLE_DEBUGGER_SUPPORT -Isrc -Isrc test/cctest/gay-fixed.cc
<denysonique> i686-pc-linux-gnu-g++ -o obj/test/release/gay-precision.o'
<denysonique> is there a -no-gay use flag? I am not a gay, I don'ts won't gay fixed or gay compiled package
<denysonique> -gay I mean
<wawowe> denysonique, add douche
<mattmatteh> wawowe: please stay on topic
<denysonique> wawowe: v8 seems to be gay fixed with gay precision |
#306143* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<oxo42> they observe my revolutions
<oxo42> they be contemptuous
<laup> thy putteth the G in Gangster
<noob> in the words of the virgin barry..
<noob> come again
* oxo42 takes a bow
<laup> "and slowly draws the string, notches an arrow and fires one clear over noobs head"
<oxo42> ROFL
<laup> booyah
<laup> :P
<noob> still nafc :D
<laup> the arrow sails on, unperturbed
<laup> you know the "haters" meme?
<laup> they see me ....... they ....... |
#306154* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<scort> so i sharpied my dick black ok
<Efreak> i thought you said sharpened
<scort> no
<scort> i love my cock
<scort> no one will mutilate it againComment: efnet irc.prison.net/#me0w
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#306161* (?/31) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<oxo42> It's something like every second, 24 hours of video gets uploaded to youtube
<oxo42> Imagine the servers they have
<brenzim> They must have midgets running around slapping servers into racks
<oxo42> Coolest mind picture ever! |
#306164* (?/39) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<lolidunno> mplayer > vlc
<ohi3> dude VLC is awful
<Chen> mpc-hc > mplayer
<ohi3> I don't care what problems you have or don't have
<ohi3> VLC is awful
<bbot> I don't know what all you nerds are talking about
<bbot> I just use itunes lol
<Smurph> vlc used to be a lot worse
<Smurph> then they started using a ffmpeg and libass
<Smurph> but it's still kinda crappy
<Chen> <bbot> I just use itunes
<Chen> that makes me sad
<Chen> :<
<Smurph> I use winamp 2.95 because I have a potleaf skin
<bbot> Chen: :3
<bbot> and on my openbsd box I use quod libet
<bbot> to listen to my FLAC encoded interpol albums
* Chen flips a desk |
#306173* (?/27) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<tempest> ?ti kaeps uoy oD .sdrawkcaB
* Anonymous wants to know what tempest means!
<tempest> Anonymous: Well, can you speak backwards without trying very hard? :)
<Anonymous> Let's say I've never felt the need to try
<tempest> Neither have I. So both of us do not speak Backwards. :)
<Anonymous> ¿ʇı *ǝq* uɐɔ ǝʍ uǝɥʍ ʇı ʞɐǝds ʎɥʍ |
#306174* (?/25) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Someone: you upped your brightness! now i can see what you type before you send it!
Someone Else: i already could
Someone Else: because i can open my eyes all the way
Someone: fine
Someone: im asian |
#306178* (?/51) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
QDB-user> Pls fix unicode txt entry. Kthxbi. |
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