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#300288 (262/422) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<c|oneman> did you ever meet this person that was so cheerful
<c|oneman> you've said to yourself
<c|oneman> I think this person would maintain the same face even when being fisted anally
<Urz> I don't believe I've ever thought those same words, no |
#301451 (262/422) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<git> i got a 'honk if you love jesus' bumper sticker on my car
<git> every time someone honks i flip them the bird |
#302228 (403/657) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@heels> i wanna be a hooker
<Doomstalk> heels: You're already a whore in your own way
<Cuzza> heels: you're already a whore
<Cuzza> ^5 Doomstalk
<Doomstalk> ^5 Cuzza
<Cuzza> ...
<Cuzza> GET OUT OF MY HEAD
<Doomstalk> GET OUT OF MY HEAD CHARLES
<Cuzza> WHAT THE FUCK MAN |
#303447 (68/104) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Broseidon> i've got a trial shift tomorrow \o/
< AdmiralGT> trial shift?
< Broseidon> yeah
< Broseidon> on a customer returns desk in ikea xD
< Extapathy> do you have to build the desk first? |
#303631 (183/293) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<nukespoon> me and my brother are watching the same stream on our own computers
<nukespoon> i am half a second faster 8)
<Sebas> Make sure he doesn't catch up
<Sebas> You don't want to cross the streams |
#304056 (59/89) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<pherricoxide> walmart.. I tried to hack into their systems during my bored time
<pherricoxide> surprisingly didn't get very far
<pherricoxide> I did manage to screw up my badge once though
<pherricoxide> I entered my badge info into the item database
<pherricoxide> so when I tried to swipe my badge to log into things
<pherricoxide> it.. would display the price instead
-*- pherricoxide was worth $0.99Comment: #wolf on irc.esper.net
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#305931 (139/219) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Joh> The worst part of life:
<Joh> That time between being able to drive the little cars at legoland and being able to drive real cars. |
#307214 (95/147) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Superfoxy> I hate everyone
<Lexy> Me too! Wanna be friends?
<Lexy> Oh wait. |
#309682 (60/90) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(Apsu) My biological clock says 12:00 and blinks. |
#952 (274/443) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(Mutiny) Atarax: you ate a americum disk from a smoke detector?
(Atarax) Mutiny: yeah
(Mutiny) Atarax: why?
(Atarax) Mutiny: I thought it would give me special powers.
(Mutiny) Atarax: what did it do to you?
(Atarax) Mutiny: well, it didn't give me any special powers, but it didn't kill me either
(Atarax) Darwin must be spinning in his grave
(Atarax) "why is that fuck still alive" |
#7814 (268/433) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<[atticus]> My parents think I'm nuts. I sit on my computer most evenings laughing at the monitor. :)
<[atticus]> Then I turn it on and come here. :) |
#8662 (194/310) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<iggypop> i told my gf some shit when i was drunk, and now she's like "you weren't just saying that because you were drunk, were you?"
<iggypop> and i don't have a fucking clue what i said |
#40643 (158/250) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<StormSeeker> "Like a campsite, you should always leave your sexual partner in better condition than when you got there." |
#45596 (291/471) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jessica> ok back
*geek throws the stick again |
#57705 (300/486) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<apeiron> Chewie[]: all four of my grandparents died because of cancer
<incarnadine> YOU HAD 4 GRANDPARENTS!??!
<incarnadine> er... wait
<incarnadine> nevermind |
#61394 (264/426) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Retro> ok so this morning my friend brings in a huge tub of peanut butter
<Retro> crunchy style
<Retro> and says he'll give me 20$ to eat it all
<Retro> two hours later, I had twenty bucks and diarrhea |
#67456 (214/342) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Shaezerus> Sep 21, 2006 Play-Asia.com Order #------- received.
<Shaezerus> Jan 01, 1970 Play-Asia.com Order #------- shipped!
<Shaezerus> Fucking timetraveling import stores.
<Koushiro> And it *still* hasn't arrived! |
#34313 (310/504) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* LittleWolfLS dresses in a Japanese sailor schoolgirl uniform
* Lenoh becomes all evil and tentaclerapes LittleWolfLS
<LittleWolfLS> DO NOT TENTACLE RAPE YOUR OPS WITHOUT PERMISSION!
<Lenoh> DO NOT PUT A SAILOR UNIFORM ON WITHOUT EXPECTING TO GET TENTACLE RAPED
<LittleWolfLS> damn, Lenoh's got me beat hereComment: w00t
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#35674 (315/515) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<-- [0_x] has quit (Quit: Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x].) |
#36734 (189/303) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<fleet> So I've started a job with a tech company
<fleet> And I'm building a server downstairs with the head of technical
<fleet> He tells me to pass him the RAM on the table
<fleet> I pick it up and read 512 DDR 2700 and ask
<fleet> "What the hell does Dance Dance Revolution RAM do differently?"
<fleet> He facepalmed and told me to go sit in the idiot corner |
#42161 (222/358) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<masteralpher> I WILL RAPE YOUR ANOS FAT BITCH
<masteralpher> STOP IMING ME
<arahi`jr> and cut
<arahi`jr> ok lets go back over that
<arahi`jr> this time spell anus right
<arahi`jr> and action
<masteralpher> send me your pic and i wont to rape your anus then
<arahi`jr> ok cut. brilliant, this time with a little more emotion. maybe all caps again, go back to that. that was working.
<arahi`jr> and roll film
<arahi`jr> action |
#44022 (193/309) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<%Sim> they've called here
<%Sim> and said "Where are you?"
<%Sim> well, my brother has
<%Sim> I'm like
<%Sim> Where do you fucking thing I am? You called the house in which we live.
<%Sim> I'm in fucking africa
<%Sim> on safari
<%Sim> gtg elephant |
#45472 (272/440) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ProfGlitch> hahaha, how ironic:
<ProfGlitch> "USA/Japan's [StarCraft] match ended in America's favor after their Terran player resolved two nuclear attacks on the Japanese team's main bases." |
#52431 (358/586) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
The topic of #ChristanSingles is *The touch of christ is an everlasting gift*
<Masatuna> i noticed that topic has been here for a while and just stopped in for a question...
<Kirt> shoot :-)
<Masatuna> can you show me where on the doll he touched you?Comment: Banned #ChristianSingles
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#196072 (373/609) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* Obsidian slowly eats a bowl of muslim
<Budrick> Er
<Budrick> You have issues, man.
<Obsidian> The other one
<Obsidian> Cereal-muslim
<Budrick> Muesli.
<Obsidian> There we go. Muesli. |
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