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#115095 (289/417) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Obby> I'm going under the knife tomorrow.
<Kabloxy> Ahh, Jesus.
<Kabloxy> Hope it all goes well, dude.
<Obby> You know what I should do?
<Obby> On my correct leg, I should write; "Wrong leg, man," and on the other write; "Or is it? HAHAHAH THE pressure's on you, DOC! JUST YOU AND THE KNIFE!"Comment: irc.waypasteleven.com, #n
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#60290 (289/543) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<_Foxy> And I am sitting in math next to the hottest chick ever cuz the teacher said thats the only thing that will keep me awake :/
<_Foxy> I was always sleeping and man...my dick is in pain after 2 hours next to her with her miniskirt!
<_Foxy> damn I'm gonna watch some more porn
<_Foxy> brb |
#53269 (289/447) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<TMH> and now I will try a new combination!
<TMH> pringles
<TMH> and garlic and herb dip
* TMH steps forwards into a new frontier!
<TMH> OH MY GOD IT TASTES AWFUL
<@Jude> A new frontier of disgust?
<TMH> it's like eating solid semen
<@Jude> ... Ew.
<TMH> ... not that I have ever eaten solid semen
<@Jude> I was going to ask
<TMH> hm, I'm actually developing a taste for it
<TMH> oh my god I am developing a taste for what I just described as solid semen
<TMH> I AM CONFUSED |
#52533 (289/441) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<SaxxonPike> so i'm wiring up this playstation to db25 (parallel) converter.
<SaxxonPike> since i'm gutting out an extension cable and resoldering, the solder gets funny with new wires.
* turm0i1 has joined #idle
<SaxxonPike> and every time it was like...
<SaxxonPike> i couldn't get it to fit
<SaxxonPike> it just wouldn't wrap around like it was supposed to.
<SaxxonPike> no matter how hard i tried pushing it in, it was pretty damn resilient.
<SaxxonPike> and when i did get it in, it flowed over the edges sometimes.
* turm0i1 has quit IRC (Quit: Saxxon, get your fucking mind off your primal urges just ONCE THIS WEEK PLEASE. I got NO time for that shit cause I'm at work)
<SaxxonPike> solder is a funny thing, you know. |
#50704 (289/463) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+Toba|Unix> And God said, trust not the tinyurl, for it is subtle and quick to abuse your trust. And it came to pass, that Robert did click the tinyurl and was assaulted from behind by gay pr0n popups. And god said, wtf? I told you...Comment: #wpi
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#46368 (289/427) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Malygris> Hey, interesting. I just got an email offering 20% off rabbits.
<Malygris> So I clicked it. I like rabbits. They're cute, and I have lots of other animals anyway,
so a rabbit or two might be cool.
<Malygris> Turns out that "rabbit" is apparently some sort of slang for neon-coloured dildos with
anal stimulators.
<Malygris> Good prices, though. |
#42950 (288/428) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<froggie> I got a cool joke. What's the difference between a 15 year old and a 17 year old?
<d4nny> I don't know
<froggie> see.. that's going to get you in big trouble, one day |
#33518 (289/521) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Loz> I didn't invent the paradox, although it was my creation |
#10110 (289/469) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kinijima> why do they keep programming labs so fucking cold?
<aalti> so the computers don't get over heated?
<kinijima> so what the fuck did the people do back when there was no air conditioning?
<aalti> you're a fucking idiot. |
#10075 (289/446) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Vic> You there X?
<X> no
<X> fuck |
#9336 (289/506) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Undertow-TOoL> You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is |
#308036 (288/320) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<nupanick> What part of the day do you most associate with masturbation?
<GreyMaria> awake |
#153537 (288/534) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<nyschashi> so I'm reading this george bush hentai manga
<nyschashi> it's pretty great
<nyschashi> Bush and Saddam make peace after they gang bang some random girl
<nyschashi> ;/
<nyschashi> the girl then randomly dropkicks Kim Jong-Il
<nyschashi> I'm skipping through about 30 pages at a time, but it looks like george bush randomly turns into a tentacle demon and rapes a bunch of people |
#60320 (288/542) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<PLUN> I've just had a vision of my future
<PLUN> Founder and proprieter of the internets' biggest Starcraft hentai site
<PLUN> On the upside, I'd stand to make a ton of money...
<PLUN> ...on the flipside, i'd be the Founder and proprieter of the internets' biggest Starcraft hentai siteComment: Chugworth.com
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#53028 (288/538) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<fr_gment> better !pout !cry
<fr_gment> better watchout
<fr_gment> lpr why
<fr_gment> santa claus <north pole >town
<fr_gment> cat /etc/passwd >list
<fr_gment> ncheck list
<fr_gment> ncheck list
<fr_gment> cat list | grep naughty >nogiftlist
<fr_gment> cat list | grep nice >giftlist
<fr_gment> santa claus <north pole > town
<fr_gment> who | grep sleeping
<fr_gment> who | grep awake
<fr_gment> who | egrep 'bad|good'
<fr_gment> for (goodness sake) {
<fr_gment> be good
<fr_gment> } |
#52156 (288/410) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
NoVwith A Bullet: lol, get this
NoVwith A Bullet: I'm chillin' here in cooper hall after hours
NoVwith A Bullet: building's all locked up
mattye15: yah
mattye15: lol
NoVwith A Bullet: security guards walk by and are like "yo, just to let you know, it's locked up, so if you leave, you can't get back in, and don't let anyone in"
NoVwith A Bullet: about half an hour later, I hear this knocking at the door next to me
NoVwith A Bullet: I ignore it
NoVwith A Bullet: it gets louder
NoVwith A Bullet: still ignore
NoVwith A Bullet: the person is freakin' POUNDING on the door when I decide to get up and look
NoVwith A Bullet: it's the security guards
NoVwith A Bullet: they locked themselves out
mattye15: LOL
mattye15: thats funny
NoVwith A Bullet: oh BOY do I feel safe on this campus!
mattye15: wow
NoVwith A Bullet: Best part? They left again without getting their keys |
#50229 (287/479) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(NES) I'm thinkg we should buy the condoms in bulk from costco
(Emmers) I won't need any *grins*
(NES) you're good at pulling out?
(Emmers) I'm a girl.
(NES) wtf |
#33217 (288/528) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Fenris> My mom found me perusing bash.org and looking up quotes about incest, and was like OMG!
<Fenris> Now she actually goes there regularly to make sure there aren't any new text words that have been searched for
<Fenris> I saw her looking at the site yesterday, and was like, "WTF??"
<Fenris> And she said she was just checking to see what kind of stuff I look at online.
<Fenris> I swear, someday I'm just going to rape that bitch.
<ctone> ...
<ctone> now theres a quote for bash.org
<Fenris> Don't you fucking dare. |
#31642 (288/456) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Rjx> I had this thought for a t-shirt design that I want to work on
<Rjx> it's the hindu god with all the arms
<Rjx> and he's typing at like 7 keyboards
<kitchen> playing eq?
<Rjx> ?
<kitchen> imagine having 7 arms
<kitchen> and playing eq on all of those
<kitchen> you'd be like.. uber raid force
<kitchen> one person
<maff> you'd also have a date for every night of the weekComment: #geekissues
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#132 (288/604) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Leaf-> Gran Turismo is hard
<Mootar> quit callin me gran turismo |
#300711 (287/463) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Xagor> I just bought some ice cream and booze. Trying both the masculine AND feminine ways of getting over an aborted relationship :( |
#290508 (287/555) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
makkusu: THE RULES OF THE INTERNET CAN EAT A BAG OF DICKS
laughlax: Ah, Jason
laughlax: yes they can.
laughlax: rule 34, remember? |
#246896 (287/355) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@ben> i've annoyed finance by putting 'sysadmin food' instead of 'Domino's Pizza' on my expenses form |
#140546 (286/660) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Johnny> has there been a zombie tv series?
<Luigi30> the osbournes |
#139936 (287/391) ↑Funny ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< madAsHell> I hate irc more when i don't even understand how i'm being insulted |
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