<GrooveDog> Unfortunately I have the programming knowledge of a walrus.
<GrooveDog> But I'll figure it out, thanks for the help. :)
<bburhans> I happen to have in my possession a very gifted walrus who speaks four natural languages and was computer literate at the age of two months... and walruses live a very long time :)
<GrooveDog> lol.
<GrooveDog> Either way, I have less knowledge of python than a python.
<bburhans> a shame, indeed. My python only knows Perl. But damn, he can do regular expressions nearly as well as the penguin...
<SnowGryphon> At a local internet cafe, I saw the most curious sight - a young man running a browser in a virtual machine and posting on PS3-centric forums. I became aware of the fact that the virtual machine software was linking the host and the VM so that the VM could use the net. Thus, I was given the rare privilege of witnessing an actual troll under a (NAT) bridge.
PartyGirl1450981: I set VLC to always look for subtitle files and use them for the corresponding videos
PartyGirl1450981: and I set it to always use the english subs for Damnatus
PartyGirl1450981: so the bob ross video I'm watching is slightly grim dark
PartyGirl1450981: hes talking about a beautiful blue color to start off with
PartyGirl1450981: and the subs are talking about how the universe has devolved into a hell of eternal war
PartyGirl1450981: I muted it for extra lols
PartyGirl1450981: and he's painting a cloud into the sky
PartyGirl1450981: "HUMANITY HAS NO ALTERNATIVE"
<scgtrp> "This License Agreement is effective until terminated."
<scgtrp> NO WAY
<Ryan> I had my car broken into. They ignored my two laptops, but instead took my iPhone charger and 3 cans of Grape Soda from my cooler.
<ShadeS> r4v5: know much about turntables?
<r4v5> not *much*
<r4v5> i put an album on it and then move the arm over?
<r4v5> and jazz comes out?
<r4v5> but yeah, the main things i know are things like "if you take a 12" trance single and play it back at 33, it becomes a chillout single of longer length"
<myself248> bwaahahaha
<r4v5> you're laughing but it was pretty fucking amazing. Friend has crates full of techno; I was like "can I spin some?"
<r4v5> First one I grabbed was full of obnoxious high squeaks. switched to 33 and it was fat acid sounds.
<@Krillin|Leach> The only thing that should not be downloaded for free is tax preparation software. I trust my Russian hacker/cracker group friends with a lot, but not my real name, social security number, place of employment, and yearly income figures
(5:06:23 AM) b2d4c3e5: I just remembered that I invented the Roger Klotz smiley when I was 17. It is my crowning achievement.
(5:06:24 AM) Liana <AUTO-REPLY>: Your IM has been sent to my mobile device. When I receive it, I will be able to reply. Thanks for your IM! Want your IMs forwarded to your phone? Click here
(5:06:27 AM) b2d4c3e5: #:^)
(5:08:44 AM) Liana: eric i have like 3 finals today i told you
(5:09:59 AM) Liana: i cant believe you woke me up for this
(5:11:44 AM) Liana: go fuck yourself
(5:13:03 AM) b2d4c3e5: #:^(
<foley> I went to a convention in Ohio with a few months ago
<foley> got chatting to some girl, she was pretty hot
<foley> kinda into "neo-femenism" and shit, which was a bit of a bummer, but no big deal
<+dEk> sucks
<foley> nah, wasn't like she was a man hater or anything that severe
<foley> anyways, she kept saying "I'm sure I know you from somewhere"
<foley> and I was sure I knew her too but we couldn't figure out where
<foley> about 30 mins later she stopped mid conversation, walked over to the buffet, picked up a glass of water, threw it over me and stormed off
<foley> for no fucking reason, I was like wtf
<+dEk> wtf
<foley> on the drive home I realised where I knew her from
<foley> remember that girl I stalked for like 3 months when I lived in Washington? well guess what, it's a small world.
<+dEk> O_O
<kelvin> I wrote an app in C# for the first time today
<kelvin> it was only about 6 lines, took about 5 minutes
<kelvin> then I felt dirty and spent the next 3 hours writing the same code in C
<kelvin> :(
<dhar> you know how I started work at that Italian restaurant last week?
<Curris> yeah
<dhar> it's called Ristorante Tiberian and I never the Command & Conquer reference until I had this customer in
<dhar> he came in wearing a t-shirt with a red logo on it
<dhar> and when I served him he said "praise kane"
<dhar> I was so confused, I thought he was like some religious nut
<dhar> when I delivered his food I noticed the logo on his shirt was the NOD logo
<Curris> hahaha
<dhar> I almost dropped his plate cos I was laughing so much
<Stormgren> She's sorta hitting on him
<Stormgren> but she's a known oddball
<Stormgren> like if you broke up with her, you'd find squirrel skulls hanging on your doorknob crazy
<Jesus> cleaned skulls, or still bloody?
<Jesus> also, does that crazy translated into depraved sexual acts?
<muchomas> depraved or not, it'll end in tears
<Dopey> is she single?
<Sebas> Heh, so I have this "Insult Dictionary" which has witty insults for every occasion, as well as a translation into 4 different languages
<Sebas> But it seems that, although the translation is generally correct, every now and then they went for an interpretation instead
<Sebas> So "Moron" comes out as "Naked savage" in the German translation, and "Greasy bastard" becomes "Filthy Italian"
<Kian> -_- ^_^ -_- ^_^ -_- ^_^ -_- ^_^ -_- ^_^ (Explanation of Bipolar Disorder)
<gmaxwell> I wouldn't be surprised if the net effect of the "don't pirate" notice is to cause a lot of people to think "wait— I could have gotten this for free?"
<indigo> 6750[~9iurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (continued for several lines)
<rogueclown> ???
<@packrat> theres a cat on indigo's keyboard
<Sneakyness> hahahahahahahahahahahaha
<@packrat> thats my guess
<rogueclown> meow.
<Sneakyness> :3
<indigo> =~s--------------------------------------------------------- (continued for several lines)
<nullspace> rawr
<indigo> =sss[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ (continued for several lines)
<nullspace> shoo cat
-!- indigo was kicked from #i3detroit by packrat [indigo]
(twenty minutes later)
-!- indigo [~indigo@theross.com] has joined #i3detroit
<indigo> well, sorry about that
<Stormgren> cat?
<indigo> i don't know
<indigo> i think i've been sitting here all that time
(two hours later)
<indigo> so, i've discovered the cause of my earlier flood
<indigo> i've been informed there *was* a cat on my keyboard
<indigo> it was another keyboard with a screen session 20 miles away
<MegaMari> She's gone
<MegaMari> mom's gone
<Snack> I'm right here young man
<Snack> you're grounded
<MegaMari> not funny
<MegaMari> not even slightly
<MegaMari> she died this afternoon
<blast007> I just think of me being single as doing two things to benefit the world: I'm helping control the population, and I'm putting a lawyer out of work.
<@Digga> aaaaand
<@Digga> the site's died
<@Digga> fucking played
<@Sebas`> Rage against the Machine thing?
<@Digga> mhmm
<@Sebas`> Bummer
<@Digga> 120,000 people registered for it
<@Digga> and seetickets can't handle it
<@Sebas`> Too much raging, not enough machines.
<@PZT> "I want you to taste these," she panted as she unbuttoned her blouse, revealing two full-grown California grizzly bears. I was on the ground before it even clicked. I glanced upwards and wove my head to the left as a set of 2" claws plunged downward at me. They grazed the side of my face. It stung like hell. One of them was sitting on my left arm; I couldn't move. I felt around for the coat hanger she'd thrown to the floor just minutes ago. A careless move for an agent, I thought to myself. I twisted it around my wrist, forming a crude hook, and jabbed at the one on top of me. It rolled over, uttering primal groans of agony as blood dripped from its eyes. I slashed blindly to my left. I didn't break the fur, but it was enough. The second bear shifted its weight, and I was able to pry my arm free. Still half-naked, I grabbed the padlocked Armani suitcase and I stumbled out the motel room door.
<Scizor300> What the hell?
* Stoney is now known as Stonaway
<@PZT> I swore silently to myself as I dashed toward the dimly lit lobby. She'd been one of them all along. An agent. The Movement had warned me not to let down my cover, even for a minute. Why hadn't I listened? A prostitute, in the beat-down slums of Madrid? What was I thinking? Her name... Bertha. Bear-tha. She'd been dangling it in front of my face the entire night, but I had been too horny to listen. Or care, for that matter.
<+Mach> What the fuck?
<@PZT> I burst out the front door and ran down the street towards a departing bus. I didn't care where it was going; no human can outrun a hungry grizzly bear on foot. I heard screams behind me, followed by roars and a horrible gnashing sound. I stuck my good arm between the closing doors, pried them open and stepped on board. I threw a few coins at the flabbergasted bus driver and made my way to a seat, ignoring the similarly confused faces around me. It didn't matter to me; the honey was safe. That was all that mattered nowadays.
< shortcircuit> So here's a fun joke to play on your Star Trek loving friends. Ask them what the name of Star Trek V was, but don't let them look it up online.
< shortcircuit> Most people I've asked get it wrong; they give the name for Star Trek VI instead.
< SilentAgony> attack of the clones
< Mattijle> empire strikes back?
<prote> apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
<Flack> hey guys whats the link to that website that goes through a little animation telling you to google things
<SMD>i am gonna retire now
<SMD>gotta read some more lovecraft
<Her>lovecraft??
<SMD>h.p. lovecraft
<SMD>he was a scifi horror writer of 1920 or so
<Her>i thought it was some romantic version of warcraft
<{KHI}DellGuy> ceil, did you check out google buzz?
<ceil> {KHI}DellGuy: Google Twitter?
<ceil> looks like an email version of google wave, but twitterized
<ceil> holy shit, too much web 2.0 in that line
* ceil washes hands