<Ironholds> "Lady Almeria Braddock felt insulted by Mrs Elphinstone and challenged her to a duel in London's Hyde Park after their genteel conversation turned to the subject of Lady Almeria's true age. The ladies first exchanged pistol shots in which Lady Almeria's hat was damaged. They then continued with swords until Mrs. Elphinstone received a wound to her arm and agreed to write Lady Almeria an apology."
<Dragonfly6-7> "Please excuse the handwriting, as my arm was mutilated when some cow slashed at it with a sword."
<scgtrp> froggey: [Link to circuit diagram]
<scgtrp> what's that thing above the transistor?
<froggey> a diode and a thing
<scgtrp> yes, what's the thing?
<froggey> dunno
<froggey> solemnwarning?
<solemnwarning> It's a box with a diagonal line through it
<froggey> that's what i thought
* scgtrp facepalms.
<froggey> scgtrp: go find a box with a diagonal line through it
ec> I thought you were bringing your lazy butt to work today
kj> yeah i changed my mind
ec> what are we going to do with all this "Welcome Back!" cake
kj> depends whether you want to keep the stripper inside alive or not
< incluye> Oh my fucking are you serious
< incluye> Today's the day for Lesson 4.04 in Modern World Studies in my online course.
< incluye> GUESS WHAT ERROR I GET WHEN I GO TO IT
<dangerousgeom> wow, your forehead has a language?
<dangerousgeom> that's impressive
<sos> every forehead has a language, just try using it for tying stuff
<sos> typing*
<dangerousgeom> v njm v
<dangerousgeom> mine seems to have a speech impediment
<@CESSMASTA> "rape risk rise for cambodia women"
<@CESSMASTA> i like alliteration and all but that headline strikes me as a tad unprofessional
<@dbelange> Cambodian Cooch Caper Count Climbing
<scgtrp> guys!
<scgtrp> someone make me fall asleep :/
<PhantmShado> ok, once upon a time
<PhantmShado> there was a guy named scgtrp
<PhantmShado> and it was late
<PhantmShado> but he wasn't asleep
<PhantmShado> so he went to irc
<PhantmShado> and was all "guys! someone make me fall asleep :/"
<PhantmShado> so a guy named PhantmShado said
<PhantmShado> "Once upon a time
<PhantmShado> there was a guy name scgtrp
<PhantmShado> and it was late
* Dritz has kicked PhantmShado (no recursion)
<scgtrp> i was enjoying that story >:(
<sje46> I avoid sex the same way I avoid bullets
<sje46> i haven't had the chance to
<Deadhope> I got fired from Wal-Mart today...
<RainbowHugz> nice. why'd you get fired ?
<Deadhope> I made a kid crap himself , he was stealing and i decided to stare at him like an angry pedophile while yelling , WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE?!?!?
<Deadhope> The kid ran away crying leaving a trail of shit. Atleast i didn't have to clean that.
<2Tone> haahahahahahahahaha
<RainbowHugz> Best...reason to be fired ever.., i'm in tears right now.
<bucketmouse> every time i feel depressed i just 7zip something from the commandline
<bucketmouse> lrobin$ 7za a test.7z blah.txt
<bucketmouse> Creating archive test.7z
<bucketmouse> Compressing blah.txt
<bucketmouse> Everything is Ok
PH: Note to car companies. Don't put "Best in class" and "In a class of it's own" in the same commercial.
<pokoko222> are you guys allowed graphing calculators on exams?
<amine> no
* Kage is
* dx is not
<pokoko222> why i dont get it
<pokoko222> it is dumb
<dx> It depends on the exam
<pokoko222> why waste time finding 6 points when i can just push a button
<lament> that's my perspective on foreplay
<Kolin> just googled myself and my dad no longer comes before me
<rye`sky> it's more romantic if you come at the same time
<Kolin> thats sick
Codi: You could always buy a RealDoll. Fuck her when you're horny, she just lays there and doesn't bitch about how you never put the seat down or take out the garbage, and you can just shove her in the closet when you're not stickin' it in her pooper.
Jason: wtf
Jason: I always put the seat down
<+Toujiron> Probably best day.
<%Misty> What happened?
<+Toujiron> I have this felt super mushroom hat, right?
<+Toujiron> I wore it out today because I'm ridiculous
<+Doak> awesome
<+Toujiron> My roommate left his work boots at home and called me to ask me to bring them to him at work, because he wouldn't have time after class.
<+Toujiron> So on my way there, I go through an intersection I usually don't because I don't have a reason to go near there, and the setting sun is in my eyes, so I have no idea that there's a stop sign there.
<+Toujiron> I am immediately pulled over by a city patrol car.
<+Toujiron> The cop walks up to my window, looks at me, my hat, and listens to my speakers for a second which are playing a rainbow road remix.
<%Misty> Please tell me he broke down laughing
<+Toujiron> Without even asking me for my ID, he leans in and says, "Son, when there's a stop sign in front of you, you have to stop hitting the golden mushroom. I know it'll disappear, but it's the law, alright?"
<%Misty> Oh that's even better
<+Toujiron> Before I could even answer that he told me to drive safe and walked away.
<+Neo-Kamek> lolololol
<+Toujiron> I have never been so entertained to be caught breaking laws.
<+Doak> Best.
<+WingedBeaux> my wife just loled at that story tou
<+WingedBeaux> is there an opposite to f my life? cause that would be it right there
<ssar> Fuck... saw the girl who lived across the street from me at this dinner party.
<ssar> I had always watched her through her window and shit... but man she just got even hotter.
<ssar> Of course the urge to approach her was strong, but I'm pretty sure a line that one should never use as an icebreaker is "Hey what's up? I used to stalk you."
<rigeld2> Just got a workorder with a list of domains who supposedly blacklist us. Our domain is on that list. I wonder when we started blacklisting ourselves.
* rigeld2 stabs stupid people
<inode0> I would do it if I had the power
<inode0> I could improve the lives of 60,000 people just like that
<Beanuritos> No way, I'm lazier than any of you.
<zetatech> i was so lazy earlier that while masturbating i just pretended i came
<Beanuritos> ...
<MorkDB> ...
<Beanuritos> respect
<kkstrong> saying if my absolute max budget is $5000, how expensive of a car can I get :/
<incluye> $5000
<+MachineDog> ....crap, how do I do the action things?
<+Kitten> you do /me
<+MachineDog> you WISH
<celti> Fuck, my cigarette burnt down to my toes.
<jules> don't you mean fingers?
<celti> No, I mean toes. I was smoking with my toes so I didn't get ash in the keyboard.
<jules> WTF
<@ rotor> a friend of mine had a parrot and it loved being pushed around on it's back
<@ rotor> it would make "vrrrm vrrmm" type truck noises when you did it
<@ rotor> it was pretty cool
<Sohcahtoa> Why are you so obsessed with the size of my penis?
<Sohcahtoa> Do you really want to know how big it is? Fine I'll tell you.
* Quits: Sohcahtoa (Excess Flood)
<NH4NO3> So you spent $1500 on your computer that "is designed to run hot"?
<Tomazim> Precisely
<NH4NO3> Gee, I wish I that that kind of money to...
* NH4NO3 puts on his sunglasses.
<NH4NO3> Burn.
<tavaryn> YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
<RobTitan> The Chile earthquake was magnitude 8.8 which I think also makes a pretty good emoticon for "I'm in an earthquake."