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#305600 (22/136) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<liarmoose> I'm just mad 'cause I know it's irrational to get revenge by throwing up on the cat.Comment: #lfs:1 otherworlders.org
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#305617* (?/40) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<whiskeyish> also, GOOD TIME OF DAY EVERYONE, i am going to end some neighbors.
<Surreal> what for whiskeyish
<whiskeyish> because i hate them.
<whiskeyish> i hate them so bad.
<Surreal> because they do what?
<whiskeyish> because they are fucking sucking up all the oxygen in my space and using it to scream obscenities in ebonics while listening to the same fucking tu-pac cd every day.
<whiskeyish> i am entirely sure that they only own one cd.
<whiskeyish> if they were less fucking ghetto and maybe even polite, i would loan them more tu-pac cds. |
#305700* (?/44) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Buchwald>: FUCK
<Buchwald>: I need the name of an untraceable illness so I can get out of going to see Drive By Truckers tonight.
<Thrasher>: HIV?
<Buchwald>: ...
<Thrasher>: what's that thing where you've had an erection for 4+ hours
<Buchwald>: Prom? |
#305750* (?/44) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<JohnMorgan> hi
<JohnMorgan> male fmr usa
<JohnMorgan> can i see u naked on cam for 500 US Dollars?
<kezhi> ok,
<kezhi> i prefer paypal
<kezhi> so you like me to strip ahead or slowly take off my clothes while stroking my penis?
* JohnMorgan has quit (XMLSocket Connection closed)Comment: #asia@IrCQ
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#306067* (?/44) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< BrainDamage> I'm 5km from switzerland though
< SpeedEvil> I am over 5km from switzerland.
< SpeedEvil> Probably.
< SpeedEvil> I may actually be in Switzerland due to heisenberg.
< SpeedEvil> I've tried this explanation with border guards, they are not receptive.Comment: Really, I've tried.
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#306181* (?/50) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< Series^> its not about looks for me anymore
< PenPen> is it about who has the bigger penis
< Series^> yes
< Series^> wait |
#306470* (?/40) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(gunning4u): y'know folks
(gunning4u): I just love where I work sometimes
(gunning4u): like today, for instance
(gunning4u): it happens to be over 60's day where I work, so everybody over 60 gets 10% discount
(gunning4u): not a lot, I know, but they flock in by the thousands
(gunning4u): and you get one old chap
(gunning4u): on a zimmerframe
(gunning4u): who needs to go to the toilet
(gunning4u): only he can't quite make it
(mo): this doesn't end well.
(gunning4u): so he, quite accidentally, shits himself before he reaches the appropriate toilet
(gunning4u): which ends up all over the floor, down his legs, so on and so on
(lotus): ....ohdear
(gunning4u): having proceeded to crap himself, he then throws his underpants or whatever he was wearing into the bin in the toilets
(gunning4u): then goes out and CONTINUES HIS SHOPPING
(gunning4u): leaving little blobs of shit wherever he goes
(gunning4u): only where I work could this happen.
(lotus): that's a dedicated shopper |
#306976* (?/34) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< Sexyboss> phillipsjk wears tinfoil hats
< phillipsjk> Plastic actually.
< phillipsjk> Tinfoil reflects too much and lets them know where you are :) |
#307522* (?/58) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< grebnaks| w w
| h h
| e e
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| e e
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| e e
| e e
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| ! !
> ! !
<@Frylock> grebnaks: NEVER fucking do that again |
#307736* (?/50) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kyle873> I understand
<Kyle873> there's like, 7 of me
*** Server connection lost
<Kyle873_> ok
<Kyle873_> the timing there is fucking flawless |
#308116* (?/40) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Atnas> okay
<Atnas> why is there a french film from the 70s on my computer
<Atnas> "Jérôme, a 35-year-old diplomat, is struck by teenage girl Claire and harbours an unquenchable desire to touch her knee ..."
<Atnas> WHAT.
<Atnas> and why.
<Buck> man I loved that film
<Buck> it shaped my life
<Buck> I haven't been able to stop touching teenage girls' knees since
<Buck> 25 restraining orders and counting |
#308145* (?/54) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<OldManRiver> My motto is if it's alive have sex with it, if it's dead have sex with it then eat it
<Honey> excuse me?
<OldManRiver> Honey, not people, I'm not I sicko
<Crispy_> ... |
#308312* (?/38) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<grum> "tempest in a teapot"
<grum> wtf is that supposed to mean
<orthopedo> i think that's like saying "big trouble in little china"
<orthopedo> wtf when did i become clever :/ |
#309163* (?/44) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
thekostya: WTF? I just found one of your hairs in my butt crack.
thekostya: Do you sneak in here at night and try to wear my ass as a hat?
fabs: hee maybe |
#309290 (22/76) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nsz> " JavaScript allows you to change the <a> href after you click on it" whatcanpossiblygowrong
<dalias> dont worry goatse got shut down long ago :) |
#310017 (22/90) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nardil>how do ya figure out a womams ring size without her knowing?
<nardil>can u tell by measuring her nipples? |
#310165* (?/32) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Taneb> Question:
<Taneb> What's a dew point?
<boily> it's the temperature an object needs to be for condensation to appear.
<pikhq> Temperature at which water vapor in the air condenses into liquid water.
<pikhq> i.e. the temperature at which dew forms.
<Taneb> OK
<Taneb> Doesn't look like there'll be a dew today, then
<boily> I mean, it's all according to current conditions. you always need to chill that object down from ambient temperature for dew to appear.
<boily> (or, be in the morning, as in, like, you know, regular dew.)
<oerjan> if the dewpoint is higher than the temperature, you're having a flood hth
<pikhq> Yes. If the dewpoint is higher than the ambient temperature it means the air is actually water. |
#310192 (22/52) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<coppro> elliott: actually, it's worse right now, I'm in the USA
<coppro> where the solution to counterfeiting problems is "add more ink"
<coppro> eventually all US bills will just be solid green |
#310227 (22/56) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@NWH> Random thought: Do Facebook users who like the movie "The Social Network" get put on a secret blacklist? |
#310444* (?/82) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Suzuran: HEY SOC
Suzuran: WHAT DOES A CHINESE PIRATE SAY?
@soc: what
Suzuran: NOT MUCH, TOO BUSY FRYING PRANE
*** You were kicked from #touhou by soc (OH MY GOD) |
#310963* (?/22) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<lug00ber> grmblmervavzzzipjresvijæav
<madame_> lug00ber: morning sunshine
<lug00ber> yeah, thanks
<lug00ber> woke up this morning to a beer in my fridge that wasn't there last night
<lug00ber> had a sticker attached to it reading "not breakfast"
<lug00ber> day's been going downhill from there |
#311440 (22/30) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
< hydrocat> Hello, I need some insight on asyncio's run_forever()
< o11c> hydrocat: if it is correctly named, it is a limited solution for the halting problem |
#311567* (?/32) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Darkness has joined
< MrSmurfing> Hello Darkness my old friend
< Darkness> I have a boyfriend
Darkness has left |
#311622* (?/46) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<pikapika> Girlcocks are fucking amazing
<cheapie> THEN HAVE I GOT GREAT NEWS FOR YOU
<cheapie> *ahem* |
#311630* (?/35) ↑Good ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Rothen> .c 1 square lightyear in square centimeters
<%topkek_2000> Oops: Ran out of units of quantity lightyear (imaginary)
<+woodcat> wolfram alpha that
<@snek-sensei> wolfram alpha my ass
<@snek-sensei> >wa my ass
<%topkek_2000> [Wolfram] Myr (megayear) = 1 Myr | 1000 kyr (kiloyears) | 1 million years | 999.3 millennia | 3.154×10^13 seconds
<+woodcat> that's phat
<@snek-sensei> dang i'm a lot of years
<@Rothen> snek-sensei's ass stretches for eons.
<+woodcat> it's almost bigger than your mum's |
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