<jenni> i should apparently empty my sofa more often
<jenni> i found a laptop i didn't remember i owned
<bubulein> DONT DRINK AND ROOT
<+replicated> talking to a friend in japan now
<+replicated> she thought she was gonna die lol
<!Suriko> tsunamis can do that
<!Suriko> is her house/relatives okay?
<+replicated> yeah all good
<+replicated> she's in yokohama
<+replicated> so no tsunami
<+replicated> but still scary as shit
<Doomfest> ask her if her figurines are fine
<+replicated> this is why you never get laid doom
* Jorfs (Jorfs@9BEA575.2F81F144.8DE8CFAD.IP) has joined #britfa.gs
<Jorfs> Shit how do i chat up this hot redhead?
<music> okc?
<Jorfs> Nah im at a bar
<music> so let me get this straight
<music> you're at a bar
<music> and you're trying to chat a girl up
<music> but you don't know what to do, so you come on irc?
<Jorfs> Yes
<Jorfs> Why are they all laughing at me now?
<music> hahah
Cycron | the first thing i thought of when i heard that Japan moved several feet: "their GPS is totally messed up now"
<Palantyre> in the Finnish wikipedia article on Amputation: "This article is a stub."
<Palantyre> Fantastic.
<Keyla> we had a fun customer today who came in with a very detailed handwritten list of components for a computer he wanted us to build for him
<Keyla> core i5 or i7, 6-8 GB of ram (or maybe 12), 2 hard drives (he specifically requested no raid)
<Keyla> for word processing
<_habnabit> Maybe he wanted to use OOo
<Sylnai> I once wrote a game for DOS which provided tactile feedback if you had your hand inside the printer
<RAMPKORV> During the days of Yahoo IM, I added a guy randomly, then started spamming him with PENIS
<RAMPKORV> Appearantly, I did it exactly when he was doing a presentation for work
<fusion2004> gahaha
<RAMPKORV> and he replied 15 minutes later and was pretty angry
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) Quit (Ping timeout)
* Apathy runs off to sleep
<Apathy> also tell fantasyprone i said "saw that coming!"
<snark> future fantasyprone says to tell you she saw your mom coming last night
<snark> I have a time machine
<snark> and will pass on your message to avoid a paradox
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) has joined #elitists
<snark> fantasyprone: Apathy said to tell you he saw that coming
<fantasyprone> if you see Apathy again, you can tell him I saw his mom coming
<snark> Will do.
* snark hops in a time machine and jumps back a couple of minutes
* snark emerges from the time machine again.
<snark> All done.
<fantasyprone> thanks
<Pryoidain> >lift up faceplate on old laptop's CD-Rom drive, make whole faceplate giant eject button, so the moment you push it in, it sits there, then ejects again
<Pryoidain> >take into small hardware repair shop
<Pryoidain> >hours of amusement
<Alister> ...you didn't.
<Pryoidain> I did
<Alister> you know
<Alister> you are the reason I never want to work support in my life
<%SxS> heh, this is why I tell my students to never use Wikipedia as a source
<%SxS> I have in front of me a paper that starts with "The internet was invented in 1976 by Al Gore".
<+Polynomial> my favourite pastime when I worked as a techie was putting horse porn in random system folders on customer machines
<+Polynomial> it surved two purposes
<+Polynomial> first it was funny as fuck if they found it
<+Polynomial> second it meant I could tell which ones I'd serviced before
<Erik> Alright.
<Erik> I'm writing a script that checks my instant messenger logs every couple entries.
<Erik> And if the ratio of Youtube links to actual messages exceeds 20%, it tells me I can't be friends with that person anymore.
<Raptor> Huh. Discovering that the last time the file system was mounted is in the future scares linux.
<Celti> Yes. Linux needs special drivers for time travel.
<Raptor> I assume I can easily apt-get them?
<MrTrick> : time-travel installed successfully
<MrTrick> #> sudo apt-get install time-travel
<dhill> I need to shave damnit. Hair is getting caught in the zipper again.
<majdo> wtf
<IMMJR> Nice knew name |xjojox|
<IMMJR> Don't quite understand what the |'s are for
<|xjojox|> so the x's dont fall off
< JDigital> my sister found out that I know the names of the my little ponies
< JDigital> I don't know how long I can keep up the facade that I don't watch it
<Gale_> my sister's neighbor is a dumbass
<Gale_> "Look at me, I'm going to have an unsecured wireless network and not change the default login settings for the router!"
<Gale_> My question is should I protect their network and change the login settings on the router just to teach them a lesson, or should I leave it be and let my sister borrow their connection whenever she feels like?
<Gale_> I did that to my neighbor a couple of years ago.
<Gale_> put a password on it and changed the router login info.
<Gale_> The router was in the dumpster a few days later and a new unsecured network showed up at the same time.
(fahadsadah) BT Openreach engineers are issued a booklet, entitled "Get it right first time"
(fahadsadah) Telling them how annoying faults are.
(fahadsadah) The current one says, on the front, "Get it right first time, Second Edition".
<Crispy> Rational behavior: Behavior that can be expressed as a fraction.
RN: no, i couldn't wait to have that fixed
RN: there are a lot of things i dont like about photoshop, but that stupid "Undo" vs. "step backward" nonsense was the final straw
CM: you might say that it was photoshop's ultimate...
CM: *puts on her sunglasses*
CM: ....undoing
CM: YYYEEEEEAAAAHHHH
<liarmoose> I'm just mad 'cause I know it's irrational to get revenge by throwing up on the cat.
<@Timmeh> harrah, my dad got through his surgery well
<@Timmeh> so well in fact his main complaint is having to wear a hospital gown
<@Timmeh> first words through the door "hey dad, how're you feeling?" "I'm wearing a fucking dress, son"
<@meeb> HAHAHAHAH i've just accidentally shipped a commercial software build to a utility for use with 8 million customers with a 3.2mb JPG of my gf holding some flowers embedded in it by accident