|
|
#18436 (392/533) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* oddjob throws a rubix cube at jitspoe
<jitspoe> ow
* jitspoe looks puzzled |
#24945 (309/427) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Milky> Tony Blair has just announced that he is sending the people that chose Liverpool to be the European City of Culture, out to Iraq.
<Milky> The theory is that if they can find Culture in Liverpool then Weapons of Mass Destruction should be a piece of p1ss. |
#20950 (338/472) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* strang3r licks eZ_T4B's ass
* strang3r kicks eZ_T4B's ass
<strang3r> u know they really shouldnt put the "l" right beside the "k" |
#23871 (321/448) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@SJr> You know since bash has gone down, I have gotten a girlfriend, started eating right, and started actually trying in school, I have an essay do and I actually started working on it?
<@magtec> sjr, you know bash is back up right?
<@SJr> *sigh* there goes my future... |
#20193 (397/560) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
«@hyu» i need an 800 by 600 jesus wallpaper
«@SkywardShadow» Type it into google. ;P
«@hyu» i am
«@hyu» google's being nasty
«@hyu» oooh, got a purdy one
«@hyu» and it's password protected
«@hyu» wtf
«@Vormav» haha
«@hyu» who password protects bible pictures?
«@Vormav» ACCESS TO JESUS DENIED |
#25161 (383/543) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<FFChatter > est ce quelqu un sait comment on fait apparaitre le menu triche dans FFX??
<Drago> Anyone speak French?
<FFChatter > yes me |
#24380 (346/496) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DocUK> whats a dropship
<supernorn2000> a ship that drops things, preferably passengers
<supernorn2000> But in Halo it drops vehicles
<Skumby> usually it drops them gently too
<Skumby> Otherwise it'll be called a bomber |
#26289 (359/519) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DawnG>I was forced to attend a seminar on leadership. We were broken into small groups and each was asked to state what skills a good leader possesses. I wrote, "Needs to be good with elephants and crossing Alps." The others at my table were amused, but the seminar coordinator didn't get it. I said it was a reference to Hannibal, known for his leadership qualities. Her reply: "What leadership qualities? He was a cannibal, and anyway, it was lambs, not elephants." |
#20435 (327/474) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<tudda> Man you guys are nerds.
<tudda> Im outta here, im going to go watch star wars. |
#25173 (232/344) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CrdStang> Oh dear
<CrdStang> Oh fuck dear no
<CrdStang> My stupid ass dad just drove the ride-on lawn mower here from his place 3/4 of a mile away |
#26287 (291/445) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<stormo> im watching the best movie atm..
<Aurian> why is it so good??
<stormo> any film where a clown fingerfucks a nun has got to be good
<Aurian> okay, i now consider myself lucky for not watching it
<Aurian> isn't it meant to be about ninjas???
<stormo> now they're having actual sex
<stormo> yeah
<stormo> the nun is a ninja in disguise
<Aurian> ahh
<Aurian> and who's the clown?
<stormo> another ninja
<stormo> look, i'm not watching this film for it's complex and involved plot |
#25114 (295/455) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@[TeMpEsT]> ok, let me get this straight. you called me a power bitch, tried to ping me off line, went around asking for the chanserv password, and then tried to evade a ban. and now you want me to op you and your damn bot so you can try to take over the channel?
<|TheRaR|> no, you only need to op the bot
<mazrim> oh, you stupid stupid fuck. |
#19782 (232/360) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<HardKase> i work for an isp , there is no "lets piss off the customers" button
<HardKase> ive looked for it
<||Rune||> we dont have a button
<||Rune||> we have to do it manually |
#25144 (269/423) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Ebony> Did anyone else realize that the media-dubbed "The War Against Terrorism" comes out as "TWAT"? |
#20866 (270/430) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<hydro`> i had this weird dream
<hydro`> someome broke into the house
<hydro`> and changed the wallpaper on the computer and left |
#25128 (230/364) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@daerid> I have a drinking problem
<@daerid> I just spilled pepsi on my shirt 4 times in a row |
#24177 (301/489) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Faight> Reproduction is stupid.
<AndrewLB> You want sex, don't you?
<Faight> I have a 6 year old brother.
<Faight> He's an annoying little bastard, but I love him.
<Faight> =/
<AndrewLB> That was quite possibly THE most disturbing answer you could give. |
#19541 (273/449) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Samurai> She isn't forcing anyone! she haven't asked them of nothing½!
<enisoc> how the hell do you type a ½ symbol by accident?? |
#21208 (231/380) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bob> It was a nervous twitch
<Carbeh> uh
<Carbeh> a nervous twitch that involved you jumping up, punching him in the face, and then insulting him online
<Bob> yes
<Bob> it really gets in the way of my love life |
#19307 (211/347) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Monsoon`> grrr
<Monsoon`> WHERE IS BROADBAND WHEN YOU WANT IT?
<Monsoon`> poor little dialup is brought to its knees by pr0n like that
<Monsoon`> whatever happened to thumbnails leading to larger images?
<skitz> Monsoon`: doesnt work like that with porn. thumbnails lead to ads
<Monsoon`> it didn't used to be that way
<skitz> you're doing a "back in the day" rant for PORN?! christ |
#20140 (217/357) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<gbp> er det noen som har Silence Of The Lambs
<dortch> i have silence of the lambs
<dortch> but i dont know what the fuck you just said |
#24395 (219/363) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<poohbear0> hey what's cracken asl
<Teeks> 80/f/Near you, loverboy.
<poohbear0> i am a girl and i am 14/f/virginia
<Teeks> Oh. Well, let us start again, shall we?
<Teeks> I am 18, handsome and Nordic. |
#25178 (214/354) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(PowrSlave) how r things?
(DAMMiT_) good
(DAMMiT_) well
(DAMMiT_) except for the fact that my 88 GT just got blown away by a Beetle with
a license plate labeled "KIWI" |
#25151 (253/423) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<phatmike> wtf
<phatmike> i dont drink that much
<phatmike> wow
<phatmike> this coffee tastes weird
<phatmike> without the whiskey in it |
#21633 (217/362) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<datamorph> lewsha, we generally call it a lan party because if we call it a substance abuse party we'd get in trouble |
#25123 (208/346) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Mojojojo> omg
<Mojojojo> there was some poo on my bedroom floor
<Sureshot> yours?
<Mojojojo> I DONT FUCKING KNOW |
#24944 (259/437) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Jason666> Heh... Failed English this year. W00t!
<MehBalls> howd you manage that one slick?
<Jason666> Put "Open minds and shallow hearts. Available online: www.goatse.cx June 22, 1995." on my Works Cited for the research paper.
<MehBalls> LOL
<Jason666> Guess he thought it sounded like an interesting artical...
<MehBalls> well... the open part wasnt far fetched... |
#25220 (253/427) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<klockwerk> If you were on a bus full of gay guys would you get off?
<cornelius> yeah
<cornelius> wait... no
<cornelius> shit |
#20524 (325/554) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Exor[B-AFK]> yeah apparently a teacher in britain was arrested. on him they found a pencil, eraser, ruler, protractor and compass. They said he was part of the Al Gebra network, and that he had weapons of math instruction!
<@Exor[B-AFK]> HA HA.
* Exor[B-AFK] shoots self |
#26291 (237/401) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rodney> damn mom still on ebay
<territory> lol
<territory> ur selling ur mom? |
#19081 (251/425) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Grue> I say we seperate the country into two parts. The people with brains, and the people sans brains.
<Grue> That way, although the idiot nation will be bigger, we'll be more intelligent and progress, while their regress.
<Grue> The world will hate them, while the world will praise the smart nation. :p
<Grue> \o/
<mike> yah, but i don't want to leave the country to get a burger |
#22537 (269/459) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<percilicious> !8ball Am I sexier than Leonardo Dicaprio?
<ChanServ> percilicious: Yes.
<percilicious> !8ball You're just saying that to get in my
<ChanServ> percilicious: Yes.
<percilicious> !8ball Well given the fact that I would never sleep with an online bot, am I sexier than Leonardo Dicaprio?
<ChanServ> percilicious: No. |
#20994 (294/506) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Andris> See you later, masturbators.
<TheKid> After a while, pedophile. |
#20513 (248/433) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(`dM`): I took a girl on a date to a lan party.. she seemed throughly bored
(DaMuppet): lol
(doggie^): hahaha
(DaMuppet): omfg dM
(DaMuppet): you;re joking
(DaMuppet): pls tell me u r
(`dM`): no. = I'm not joking. it was an impromptu lan party. and then the guys started trading porn
(`dM`): it was downhill from there |
#19054 (208/365) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
in #teen
[itstomEK] 20-m-melb.pix msg me for a chat 8)
[DiZ] 20 omg , ure ot a a teren
[DiZ] banz0r him
[Jon-] i would, but i'm still trying to decipher what you just said |
#20790 (226/396) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Epi> anyone gots photoshop7 cd key, my net browsering skills are only lvl 36, i need lvl 40 so search for one
* JesterX gives Epi Scroll of googling +5
<JesterX> use it wisely |
#25129 (170/296) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ignatz> If you piss off enough people, it's hard to tell the difference between a distributed denial of service attack and public opinion. |
#26285 (231/407) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AL9000> I'm gonna make my girlfriend a valentine with the goatse man on it, and it will have a caption that reads "I love you thiiisss much!" |
#20164 (283/502) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KJ> I was in a shop in Britain, when an American tourist in front of me tried to pay for something in US dollars. The shop keeper politely told her that this was Britain, and you can't use U.S. dollars here. The lady replied... "But I had no problems in other third world countries" |
#25176 (163/285) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+Normandy> How poor is this.
<+Normandy> that exercise bike I've been lookin forward to start building my leg muscles for the summer finally arrived today
<+Normandy> yet I'm carryin it upstairs and twat it against my knee, and now my uncle who is a doctor says i cant exert any pressure on it for 2 bloody months |
#20416 (198/353) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(El_Diablo) The centre offers a number of extra-curriclar programs for the children. These programs include:
(El_Diablo) # Dance Program
(El_Diablo) # Music and Movement Program
(El_Diablo) wtf is the difference between dancing and moving to music?
(raygun) not moving to music
(raygun) music AND movement
(raygun) music and movement = musical chairs
(raygun) music and movement = striptease
(raygun) music and movement = fight club
(raygun) etc
(El_Diablo) it's a daycare, ray.
(El_Diablo) there's no striptease. there's no fight club.
(raygun) i bet they play the shit outta musical chairs, though |
#21158 (179/319) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<webby> anyone else noticed an emergent trend where people deliberately say 'teh' instead of 'the'?
<webby> trust the internet to make a profoundly fucking dumb typo cool |
#25170 (195/357) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<NewSonCometh> my sister found 50 bucks today
<NewSonCometh> then the person who dropped it asked her if she found it
<NewSonCometh> with the clenched 50 sticking out of her hand, she said "Nope, I don't have any cash at all"
<NewSonCometh> then the lady just walked away
<NewSonCometh> I wish more people with an abundance of 50's were that stupid |
#19076 (218/395) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Seaker> I just ate supper and then puked it up straight away, does that mean I'm balemic or whatever?
<Safire> Could be, you seen a doctor about it?
<Seaker> Wait, it was McDonalds.. does it still count.
<Safire> Oh ok no I think that's normal |
#20670 (172/309) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<|DeadPan|> I dont get drunk
<|DeadPan|> i am in control of my faculties
<PT-Away> thats cause your a moron
<PT-Away> err mormon
<Terry> same shit |
#24405 (203/369) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<carhartt> I would hate to be a op around here. It's be like running a daycare center for "special" children, except without the feeling that you're doing something worthwhile. |
#25202 (231/421) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<burrahobbit> "Hi, my name is Tyson Vandagriff and, I am going to be your roommate next year at OU."
<burrahobbit> AND COMMA
<burrahobbit> HOLY CRAP MY ROOMMATE IS RETARDED |
#25556 (224/408) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<%pan-chan^^> i need about 8+ hours of sleep
<+gabu> yes
<+gabu> but you're from australia
<+gabu> you sleep during the day
<+gabu> don't you ? |
#25111 (190/350) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Tracer> i recently had a to punish an engineer at work because the video camera's in the main assembly hangar caught him wacking off in the cockpit of a F-16.. |
#20734 (170/312) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Bivens> Internet Explorer Tip: when it says "turn off images", it only refers to inline images. Which is why it's safe to go to Goatse but not Tubgirl. I think it's obvious how I figured this out. |
#20136 (196/367) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Beige> It's one o'clock.
<Beige> Do you know where your children are?
<Apollyon> In my testes. |
#20461 (186/344) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KillaDawg> I don't want to move to Singapore with you. too humid
<PinkRydergurl> Well, you don't have to wear clothes..you can walk around naked like people in Africa..
<KillaDawg> Uhhhh, people in Africa have large penes, so they can comfortably walk around naked. I'm white; I'm not quite that well-endowed
<PinkRydergurl> Uhhhh, once again, we're talking about SINGAPORE, which is in ASIA....you're more "gifted" than you think you are... |
#19407 (172/318) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[igossip] <Xyzzy@Frontiers> antiterrorism training 101: in each of the following situations, think of what choices the hero of an action movie would make, and dont do that |
#25168 (162/300) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CrackZ> I'm gonna be getting a new boss soon too
<CrackZ> its a power hungry female
<CrackZ> ya know the type
<CrackZ> her 'can do' profile is going to clash with my 'can't be arsed' profile |
#20900 (203/385) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SomeGuy> My computer has no firewalls. It is protected by a thin layer of cheese
<screevo> Well, thats gouda, someguy
<SomeGuy> RIMSHOT!
<Treen> ...
<screevo> what type of cheese?
<SomeGuy> Wisconsin Cheddar
<screevo> heh. thats very sharp of you
<screevo> being the religious guy I am, i use swiss
* SomeGuy snorts
<screevo> I like it holy, ya know.
<SomeGuy> oh the puns
<screevo> when I was more of an emokid, i used bleu cheese...it seemed to fit the mood.
<screevo> one day, i wondered what happened if I took the cheese protection off, but was too scared to try
<screevo> so eventually, i munsteared up the courage to do it...
<SomeGuy> oh my god
<Treen> damn you. damn you straight to hell.
* SomeGuy Quit (Quit: Avante!)
<screevo> think we were too...cheesey for him? |
#21364 (145/272) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<wormie> go to a junk yard
<wormie> get an old car that runs
<wormie> give the fat guy workin there 20 bucks for it
<wormie> drive it into the store as deep in as you can
<wormie> hop out
<wormie> and when everyones running away
<ubergamer> LOL
<wormie> go grab a cd key :) |
#25171 (176/332) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Feared> Everyone's against me.
<Feared> It's like my school is here. |
#25640 (168/320) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<pvah> when i got my cable modem.......i had to get rid of about 4 friends in order to manage my time |
#26243 (203/391) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Princess Ryo: lindsay, you're not good at keeping secrets at all.
SynistraDeath: rob my dad is in here
SynistraDeath: shut up
Princess Ryo: LINDSAY
Princess Ryo: EVEN IF WE ARE OCEANS APART
Princess Ryo: I STILL WANT TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER
SynistraDeath: shut up
Princess Ryo: SEND ME MORE LETTERS
Princess Ryo: AND MORE PANTIES
SynistraDeath: ROB SHUT THE FUCK UP
Princess Ryo: PREFFERABLY SOILED PLZKTHX |
#26290 (177/345) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CYwolf> I always wanted to get 8 eyebrow piercings and hang a little curtain |
#25121 (183/359) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<sab0tage> who thinks an Imperial Star Destroyer could take a borg cube?
*** sab0tage was kicked by Q (You are BANNED from this channel.) |
#25137 (157/307) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dawai> i feel like fucking my gf in the ass real hard
<Dawai> the only problem is she dumped me some time ago |
#18433 (139/271) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* MFornal remembers when he used to sit on here all night, every night.
<Sprinkle> yea, we do too.
<Sprinkle> thank god you left |
#24171 (191/379) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<[6thAB]Barnes> I wasn't masturbating!
<[6thAB]Barnes> I was just cleaning it and it when off!!! |
#19539 (215/435) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Eldoran : Umm lets see, it was recess during 4th grade and I was reading Return of the King, I think it was at the breaching of the gate.. but thats beside the point
Eldoran : Then a quasi friend in my class approaches me, and tries to "call me out"...
Eldoran : and I'm ignoring him... so he snatches my book from me and throws it on the ground.
CptAwesome : So you stabbed him
Eldoran : Hes standing square to me, with his fists up, and I step foward snap kick him in the crotch, then follow thru on the motion bringing my other legs knee up to his decending chin
CptAwesome : then you stabbed him?
Eldoran : No :{
CptAwesome : so, when the hell did you stab him?
Eldoran : I never did!
CptAwesome : Then how was this a fight? |
#20480 (142/285) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<asshat> went for lunch at the hardrock with a friend
<+mcfly> hardrock... is that the resturaunt where they serve you naked?
<asshat> went to the bathroom, was taking a piss, sneezed, and peed one the dude next to me's shoes
<asshat> sneakers
<asshat> Mark cuban wears Pony sneakers
<+mcfly> wait
<+mcfly> wait
<+mcfly> you peed
<+mcfly> on mark cuban?
<asshat> sprinkled his shoes
<asshat> from splashback from urinal
<+mcfly> BWAHAHAHAAH
<asshat> theres only 2 urinals in ahardrock cafe
<asshat> with a little divider
<+mcfly> thats cause they can't afford another
<+mcfly> but still
<+mcfly> BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<asshat> I apologized
<asshat> and i didnt realize who he was
<morningbell> did he call you a cunt
<asshat> no
<asshat> he laughed
<asshat> then left the bathroom and he sat and read the paper
<asshat> i told the bartender what happend, he laughed his ass off then he told me who that waas |
#20690 (135/273) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[sta_hi] i had a static ip once
[sta_hi] till i touched a doorknob |
#19856 (145/299) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<drwiii> sorry, recommending FreeBSD is the entire realm of my technical expertise. |
#23839 (164/341) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<manmanandboyboy> date syllabus check
<d00fus> dinner, movie, then snuggling
<munbty> carnival, cotton candy, and then moonlight stroll
<soccy_pants> drugs, rape, 2 hour police chase |
#18506 (155/324) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[#HLM Gamesnet]
<+seph> ever wake up with a cat on your face?
<+seph> its kinda alarming
<+seph> you just woke up, not aware of anything, and you cant see
<+seph> and your mouth is filled with cat hair
<+seph> ewww
<@Timmy> nothing like waking up to a beautiful cute pussy in your face |
#26278 (148/312) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<KArmA-> imagine someone sliding a cold, very long, narrow hose up your ass
<phr0work> it can't be worse than a man's finger
<phr0work> ugh
<KArmA-> um
<KArmA-> trust me |
#18806 (151/321) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
churchonmondays: whatcha up to?
MissMandieMay: not much
MissMandieMay: talking
MissMandieMay: with da peps
churchonmondays: don't you mean peeps?
MissMandieMay: no
MissMandieMay: people is spelled with one e
churchonmondays: OMG take that back before i call you a dumbass |
#19617 (154/327) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rivorus> i feel stupid cuz i can never open the godam condoms
<Rivorus> and then when i get it on i feel even more dumb cuz I'm the only one in the room |
#21245 (133/281) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Lyrael> you wouldn't even miss me
<The_Sorcerer> it just wouldn't be the same without you
<The_Sorcerer> for one, the average user count would drop from 30 to 29 |
#25113 (129/271) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Mandingo> This is why I go to CNN.com.
<Mandingo> http://www.cnn.com/2002/US/08/08/porn.patriot/index.html
<American> im not clicking on anything that says porn patriot
<AirsickMoth> some american. |
#22838 (130/276) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Alex> whenever i finally think i'm gonna dump this girl, she always says something that changes my mind, like right before i say something
<Alex> generally a 'i love you alex'
<Alex> shes a psychic gold digger :( |
#25169 (144/308) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<EssKay> i don't want to have fucking poles in my underwear, man.
<Rjx> that joke went so far over your head it got hijacked and flown into a major landmark |
#26295 (127/269) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<gwend> my 6 key doesnt work half the time ><
<Kiri> my CTRL key types a ` when i press it
<Kiri> lol
<gwend> lol
<Kiri> and my numpad opens internet explorer
<Kiri> or my computer
<Kiri> depends on which number lol
*** Kiri has quit IRC (Read error: 54 (Connection reset by peer))
<EvilCouch> guess she pushed the wrong number |
#19724 (135/290) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<jacs> I can't sleep with him and then see him leave in six days. too much. I may go to Toronto in the fall though..so..we'll see.
<sirgreg> that's too bad.
<jacs> but who knows...I could just kick him out of my car and fuck him on the transcanada.
<sirgreg> they lied. Romance isn't dead. |
#19692 (143/309) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
·jliechty· all right, i'm so fucking bored now
·jliechty· this sucks
•bryce• go and get a deer head to mount
·jliechty· sounds like a good idea
·jliechty· where can i find one?
•bryce• on a deer |
#20341 (122/262) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<donovan> but there may be a new exploit released while I'm sleeping, is what I am afraid of
<donovan> I sure would go to the kitchen to get a snack but if I leave my computer, odds are 99% I'll be portscanned
<sealie> wouldnt that be what to call paranoia at its finest |
#20804 (136/294) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@KaZaA> haha, elephante12 has a homeless chick for a girlfriend :p
<+elephante12> shadap
<@KaZaA> you know i'm just kidding :D
<keyb0red> hey hey, there are some advantages to having a homeless chick for a girlfriend
<keyb0red> after going out, you can drop her off anywhere! |
#18616 (143/309) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<UBeR> If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends? |
#25181 (131/285) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
slurpee: got p2p?
Arcane: p2p?
Arcane: are you asking me for drugs? |
#26242 (116/254) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
--> kNIGits (~knigits@dialup-214.69.221.203.acc07-wick-bne.comindico.com.au) has joined #lgl
<Fryboy> phwoar
<Fryboy> if you're as big as your hostmask I"m sure your wife is pleased |
#24266 (129/285) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<InvaderZ> Organisers of a children's beauty contest have agreed to remove the swimsuit and "sexy body" categories from the pageant after protests by child rights activists
<Samah> zim thats actually pretty bad
<Samah> because it should be the child's right to wear that if they want
<Samah> so really they're removing their rights
<InvaderZ> hahaha
<InvaderZ> it's ok Samah ... i like seeing 3 year olds in swim suits too
<InvaderZ> err I mean ... I don't ...
<InvaderZ> ahh .. I'M AWESOME
* InvaderZ leaves |
#18503 (103/231) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<splat_v2> bob is in a pigfucker mood!
* HrdwrBoB goes off in search of a pig :)
<splat_v2> you wanna make it squeal!
<splat_v2> and its good cause they dont sweat!
* HrdwrBoB doesn't ask how you know that |
#25185 (119/267) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Morelos> i think i want the rtfm shirt
<maxracer> whats rtfm
<Morelos> maxracer - i suggest you rtfm to find out
<maxracer> man rftm? |
#24907 (126/288) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nimitz> if a tree falls on a lumberjack, and there's no-one else there, does he make a sound?
<will> "Oof." |
#25479 (134/308) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<PolestaR> Swish I dont have your skill where you just say *smiles* online and the girl is yours
<Swish> rofl
<PolestaR> I have to like, talk for like 5000 chars before I even get the phone number
<PolestaR> which is fake |
#20401 (104/237) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<bucketms> any idea how fast your comp is?
<dan> how do I check?
<bucketms> go to the desktop, right click on My Computer, go to properties
<dan> i have GENERIC IDE DISK TYPE 46!
<dan> SWEET |
#25124 (144/334) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<maddox> You know what I hate? Programs that pretend like they're sentient beings. Ftp daemons are the worst.. you type "bye" and it responds: "221 bye bye".. or your login fails and you execute a command, it says "log in first, then I might let you do that." Yeah? Well echo "fuck you" > /usr/bin/ftp
<professor> hahaha.
<maddox> "bzip2: I won't write compressed data to a terminal."
<maddox> no, "you" won't write anything because you can't. You're a piece of shit binary written by a lonely programmer who has seen 2001 too many fucking times. |
#25183 (95/215) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<mig|sluice> trillian, like a capitalist social-democracy, will suit me until I see something better to take its place. |
#21588 (122/284) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<mindstorms> did u ever realize how gay the term "manhole" sounds?
<mindstorms> you know, like those thigns they go in to get to the sewer.
<mindstorms> it just sounds wrong.... |
#25155 (127/301) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dingles> Why am I such a funny person?
<Jack104> 'Cause your life is a joke? |
#25158 (111/259) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Winquman> Please note that you will have much faster service if you use HelpServ. Type /msg HelpServ <issue>. Thank You.
*** ChanServ has quit IRC (Suarez.Hub.US.GamesNET.net Services.GamesNET.net)
*** HelpServ has quit IRC (Suarez.Hub.US.GamesNET.net Services.GamesNET.net) |
#20771 (112/270) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<j0nkatz> SHIT!
<j0nkatz> SHIT!
<j0nkatz> SHIT!
<j0nkatz> Tornado siren!!
<j0nkatz> brb |
#19709 (106/256) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<triviabot2> 31. With whom do you associate: "mom always liked you best"?
<XX01XX> my cock
<XX01XX> wait... no |
#25131 (126/312) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
* ClusteR- is away [log: on]
<Icecream> What script are you using?
<ClusteR-> huh?
<ClusteR-> I don't use any script
<Icecream-> So did you just type /me is away [log: on] or what?
<ClusteR-> yeah... |
#19834 (103/254) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rodent> Me and my penis have an understanding.
<Cornjob7> "I'm going to choke you till I get what I want?"
<Rhaz> You want the semen? I always considered that an annoying feature |
#24127 (138/348) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Shadow> "Look! Up in the sky! Floating ejaculate!"
<Shadow> "Those are clouds, moron." |
#26288 (135/347) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<TuxMan> beh you know what happened...
<terminus> what?
<TuxMan> i whacked off while watching the linux kernel compile...
<TuxMan> i mean... uh...
<terminus> o_O |
#19400 (90/226) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(willay): sex+workplace doesnt work i think!
(XorA): unless you are a whore |
#20855 (104/266) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<|NightChade|> Chinese smorgasboard and beer - $15
<|NightChade|> 3 glasses of red wine - $6
<|NightChade|> 4 salami sticks and a gurana energy drink - $8
<|NightChade|> 2 litres of coke - $1.80
<|NightChade|> The screams of horror of your toilet - Priceless |
#18474 (138/362) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Fryth> anyone seen the movie pi
<Murdock> I saw it 3.14 times. |
#20560 (101/262) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Mr Markus White: So what are you doing online, criminal.
FerrusSoldad: Pirating mp3s.
Mr Markus White: One of those Napster frauds huh
FerrusSoldad: IRC.
Mr Markus White: Isn't that a hacker program |
#20959 (95/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nordling> Yes, the climax will be a Neo/Smith DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION dance off. |
#21066 (137/365) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Canadian_Beaver>Yeah, I just finished putting a coat of polish on my hubby's boobs.
<@Canadian_Beaver>ER...boots...
<@Canadian_Beaver>Dammit...I can SO see that on bash.org
*Canadian_Beaver hides in shame |
#23701 (111/292) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Jakefeb3: if i brought a cat in my backback and let it out during finals do you think i would get in trouble
AvatarOfSolusek: which finals?
Jakefeb3: math
AvatarOfSolusek: ...probably not
AvatarOfSolusek: Mrs. J woulnd't care much
Jakefeb3: well if a cat bums outa my backpack dont be suprized
AvatarOfSolusek: lol
AvatarOfSolusek: ok
Jakefeb3: and if fireworks shoot out of its mouth after it comes outa my backpack..... dont be suprized of that either |
#24791 (83/229) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<AragornEstel> hey harpana
<AragornEstel> did you get all of KS from me?
<Harpana_Rocks> yes i did thank you
<AragornEstel> np
<Harpana_Rocks> now i can wipe the cum off of my screen
<Harpana_Rocks> damn wrong channel |
#25118 (90/254) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Arcane[maid]> i stole one of those blue signs that says "phone" on it
<Arcane[maid]> what should i do with it
<suds> stick it down your pants and ask hot chics if they want to call collect. |
#19874 (83/231) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<munch> quiet in here tonight
<munch> where's shinji, mills and the mansex?
<LordKhan> you just answered your own question |
#26292 (93/265) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*IgnusDei learned that no matter how bad things are, it will never be quite as bad as the time he masturbated in the adult secton of the video store...which of course was under vidcam surveillance
<IgnusDei> ZING!
<m|tutorial> if i didnt like the current topic
<m|tutorial> that would be there right now
<DrFurious> it could be worse
<DrFurious> you could have masturbated in the gay adult section of the video store |
#20780 (96/281) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
« turkey » when a baby matures to age 16 (well, thats when it happened for me), it grows testicles, large frogs in its throat, and hair all over
« turkey » then the spleen explodes and an alien comes out
« turkey » and thats how babys are made
« Dilbert » when does the stork come?
« turkey » When you jack him off long enough |
#26279 (87/257) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Hatter> I accidentally just IM'd a coworker "Dong lunch?" instead of "Doing lunch?" :? |
#25142 (95/283) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<phats> damnit, now that I'm checking my mail pretty often I'm not getting any
<phats> heh
<phats> mail that is |
#20304 (81/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<b1u3> boy youd think after all the years of internet porn you'd know how to tie a girl up like they do in those hentai bondage movies |
#21173 (97/295) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Beelzebub> Necrophilia isn't rape, it's recycling |
#20237 (89/271) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Paintballaddict> when I grow up, I wanna be green
<Paintballaddict> my mom said I could be whatever I want to be, so I want to be green
<Slayer1> dude, ure wierd |
#25153 (113/355) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
{ava}> A WORM
<{ava}> JUST
<{ava}> CRAWLED OUT OF MY DOGS ASS AND LANDED ON ME
<_enzo> o m f g
* {ava} dies. |
#21182 (91/298) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
Cyber J: the reason why Canada doesn't have much of a military is because they havn't made over 20 countries hate their guts like their neighbors down south... I know, I live in America :( |
#18931 (72/229) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<pizzathie> sex? what's that?
<Foole> pr0n without a camera
<pizzathie> I must have been doing something wrong at school
<Foole> i did lots of wrong things at school |
#25637 (68/216) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nicklon> agh i just typed in lego technic into limewire search and i got porn results
<Reubenoit> probably because you typoed 'lego' as 'hardcore penetration" |
#20395 (75/247) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@PHiZ> "If you can't keep it in your pants, keep it in the family."
<@Riyan|Work> "one eyed mutant children welcome here" |
#25638 (73/241) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Aximili> WHAT THE DAMN HELL WAS THAT AHHHHHH
<Nicklon> ·Aximili· => puberty |
#20172 (82/275) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<freddieandthestarfish> if homosexuallity is a disease, can i call into work gay??
<mal_s> u homo |
#20602 (58/190) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
#closed-minded :@mcc
*** Mode change "+b *!*@* " on #closed-minded by mcc
*** mcc has set the topic on #closed-minded to Come on in for intelligent and interesting discussion of current events. |
#18446 (73/249) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<RoyalBlood> hes like "my dad tells me all about cars cuz he downloads them from the internet" ...
<RoyalBlood> i would have slapped him if i was closer
* Fembot knows all about women 'cause he d/l's them off the Internet |
#21583 (73/265) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<MikeSee> what OS does windows run on? |
#20167 (58/208) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Continuity> Disassembling VB code is like looking at one of those magic eye pictures |
#20858 (63/241) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<nutrasweetie> lol my brother is such a little creep
<nutrasweetie> hes on the phone w/his friend
<nutrasweetie> and he goes to me "can i go online"
<nutrasweetie> me: "no, you're on the phone"
<nutrasweetie> "well, my friend wants to tell me something, and i called him and the lines busy"
<nutrasweetie> me: "NO"
<nutrasweetie> john goes back to the phone "damn, she wont let me on to talk to you" |
#25147 (56/212) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<ImotepReturns[WoA]> since this is a room full of whom i suspect are adaults
<ImotepReturns[WoA]> whats the best advice everyone has?
<ImotepReturns[WoA]> in life that is
<Caedar[SOT]> Uh.... "Don't try and write good code at 4 in the morning."
<Caedar[SOT]> ;)
<AnthraX101> Or, as it applies to IR: try and write good code. |
#18641 (54/206) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<kinderkid> my man is at home..... playing playstation.... and i was here looking on ebay
<kinderkid> best convo we've ever had
<kinderkid> haha
<ataribaby> hjahahah kickass
<stargroove> "convo"
<ataribaby> is that irc slang for phone sex in different rooms in the house?
<stargroove> yes |
#18985 (59/228) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
-ChanServ- [#etheria] Welcome to Etheria. Please be sure to read the !rules. I hope you die so we can eat your babies. |
#25157 (60/234) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Aster> welcome to the cyber police network, because of your behavior and every one elses on this chat network, ffonline irc will be shut down in 24 hours, by your friendly neighbour hood hacker.
... (s) Server Notice -- Received KILL message for Aster from Spank Path: Spank (hack my balls) |
#20457 (68/274) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<juri_> calc thread_saftey_dance
<algorithm> o/~ we can thread if we want to/ we can leaving blocking IO behind / but if your libs don't lock (and it seems they don't lock)
then they're no libs of mine. we can block if we want to/ setjmp()? longjmp()? never mind! / and we can act like select() is all
a bad dream / with a scheduler to hide behind o/~ |
#25150 (64/260) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Uhh_Duh> And to all you virgins, THANKS FOR NOTHING! |
#19002 (58/246) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<p0tat03> How to Score, Chapter 4: Make Sure You Have a Pimpin Suit
<Hyde> How to score, Chapter 5: alcohol is your friend |
#25132 (61/271) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
*** _Kenny (kenny@md4690fc1.utfors.se) has left #cracking4newbies
*** _Kenny (kenny@md4690fc1.utfors.se) has joined #cracking4newbies
<_Kenny> who kicked me |
#19096 (56/251) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kurohito> im not european
<Kurohito> Im Spanish |
#25187 (45/207) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<unknown> once I was wanking while playing doomII and someone snuck up behind me and shot me in the back with his shotgun and I almost tore off my helmet.. Folks I am telling you it's not fucking worth it!!! |
#19074 (51/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Stalker> Up what?
<Push> Up the rabbit hole?
<Stalker> DOWN! DOWN the rabbit hole! |
#21249 (52/262) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@Elijah_Wood> when and on what channel are the academy awards on?
<@Antipothis> #acadamy_awards |
#25152 (43/225) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<kolby> shit I'm sick, just got out of the hospital
<Scofco> You ok?
<kolby> Yea but Ball Reduction surgery is no cup of tea |
#19586 (48/260) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[12|23:38:28] <trunkz> LetHaL is gat
<trunkz> gay even
<LetHaL> trunkz is gayer
<trunkz> yes he is
<trunkz> what! |
#18965 (41/225) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Pseudonym> I love how all through GTA3 there's an anti-drug theme
<Pseudonym> You spend half or more of your missions stopping people from pushing SPANK |
#20749 (52/326) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
xenophile: been awhile since i've done a mailman
xenophile: DO NOT PUT THAT ON BASH>ORG!!@@!!@ |
#26281 (40/240) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Madchemist> the best part of UO was that some people just wanted to be farmers or weavers or some mess
<Madchemist> and you could slaughter them and take their hard earned stuff |
#25163 (29/197) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Motaro > Live Journal would've been so much better if it were called Jive Journal.
<cylinder > shoudl've been called STICK YOUR FUCKING LIFE IN HERE AND THEN WHINE WHEN PEOPLE MAKE CRUDE COMMENTS Journal |
#20517 (34/247) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<SteamedHams> jesus christ, it's not like insulting zirc is blasphemy for gods sake
<SteamedHams> fucking hell
<SteamedHams> moses cunt
<SteamedHams> apostle gayrape |
#20832 (39/299) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<damn_fig> someone needs to form Bashaholics Anonymous
* DirtyPunk submits damn_fig's quote to bash. |
#20182 (33/261) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+timovgod> I had a penis transplant but my hand rejected it |
#20216 (26/216) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Nihilanthic> and right now we got Kim in north korea --;
<Dark_Magician_Shinkaa> yeah
<Nihilanthic> I wish China would just tell him to STFU :(
<Dark_Magician_Shinkaa> or cough on him :P |
#24437 (29/329) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<dooder> whats the quickest way to make a woman orgasm
<Ferrus> Who cares. |
#25136 (18/208) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
(jmd_) %lb chameleo
(jmd_) dead bot?
(@seymour) read the topic. we moved.
(jmd_) oh, goody
(jmd_) so long efnet, and thanks for all the splits |
#19711 (21/283) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<aero>I bet you have night mares of like a wrecking ball flying at you, then it zooms out and its your grandpa's balls flying right at you.
<Smoke> >:-| |
#20905 (14/282) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Dabz> truly.nice.ass.3.cd2.avi <- disney film about a really friendly donkey? |
#21109 (11/279) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Danarchy> I'm glad that with my small penis, I'll always be gentle with the ladies |
#26293 (10/226) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<timmo> i fucking hate
<timmo> when i answer the phone
<timmo> and it gos like this
<timmo> me: hello?
<timmo> person: hello?
<timmo> me: ... <click>
<timmo> well i hate everything besides the last line |
#26286 (10/262) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
I like 2eat tape: when i was in 4 th grade there was this awesome 5 grader matthew podawski, i rememeber, and he used to ride his bike to school and mis match socks and and i really wanted to be his friend but he was so weird and he thanked me for the offer but was like "one friend in the world is enough" he then transfered schools |
#20632 (9/266) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Manuva> who keeps uploading the college fuckfest shit? Cause it sucks
<Minion> one of em was okay, I didn't download it from the ftp tho
<Manuva> but they're so obviously fucking staged
<Manuva> It's like they're saying "Hey this is what happens at college and you're missing it fag!"....but it's bullshit :(
<Minion> so what
<Minion> who cares if its fucking authentic
<Manuva> Me...I wanna see some bitch get clubbed in the face by a lamp and get beastfucked by 3 guys |
#25428 (7/247) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<BitchX> [She] can't find the serial #
I told her it was on the disk...so she ejected the disk and told me it wasn't on it, then showed me the top of the disk |
#20534 (6/386) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<CuZZa> they need to hand out personal jizz screens at Matrix Reloaded
<CuZZa> man i had my jacket on my lap most of last night trying to hide the massive BONER i had |
#20162 (5/246) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<`FrEaK> that chick was hot... he prolly had a huge boner
<g0dsmack> only you would care if another man had a huge boner. |
#20081 (4/257) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Charlums> i was on tour with the biggest touring act in the world for 2 years kids
<Fitzy> on tour huh?
<Charlums> lord of the dance
<Charlums> i was in lord of the dance
<Lernal> hahaha
<Lernal> oh god
<Fitzy> are you THE lord of the dance? |
#20509 (4/272) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<+psychoace> damn fucking netsplits
<+psychoace> when will mirc solve this problem |
#21139 (4/242) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
·xplosif· sif im lesbian
·xplosif· i just got my dick sucked!
•TwisTz• by a chick?
·xplosif· no a guy |
#20350 (2/318) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
LinkDJ: hey, you might be able to help me out here
LinkDJ: Where might a brother be able to be alone with his ho?
UH60SO: The Matrix
LinkDJ: Thanks. When my balls fall off, I'll give you one. |
#20246 (2/268) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<EarthQuake> which came first? the chicken or the egg? :o
<EarthQuake> hehe
<@omega> omega came first
<@omega> then the chicken got pregnant |
#21194 (2/277) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
[Perdition] I have broadband, but it makes me look fat |
#20213 (0/328) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<kevin> i had BAD acne
<kevin> VERY bad
<kevin> then they put me on meds
<kevin> and now my skin is clear as crystal
<Adora> you got scars?
<kevin> nope
<kevin> thankfully
<kevin> but yea, my zits were so big that i could fill the entire mirror in one pop :| |
#20962 (-2/412) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Heavy_P> Whats the diffrence between a black and a table
<Heavy_P> A table can support a family |
#21246 (0/312) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Kyle> All the EfNet servers are connected, right? |
#19576 (-1/342) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<RadarNocturn> this is an online wrestling group, for furries |
#21634 (2/208) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Chojin_> I mean I'm STILL insulted that she saw me just as a walking dildo
<bngrybt> heh
<bngrybt> yeah that's what tisha thought of me i think
<CommanderStab> I'd be insulted at that Chojin, but only that she acutally BELIEVED she could get away with it
<bngrybt> cuz jody asked her what she liked about me and the first thing she said was practically "well his dick's like 8 inches long! |
#25641 (1/249) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<J{E}K> What is the best song of NIN?
<uidv6> ALL THE SILENT TRACKS ON BROKEN |
#18360 (-1/317) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<DaveMan> isnt hentai just crappy manga? |
#19702 (-1/318) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<lemmer> I DON'T SEE WHY THEY DON'T COMPRESS YOU INTO TINY CUBES AND MAKE CARS OUT OF YOU BECAUSE YOU ALL SUCK |
#19437 (1/215) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Vic> You really think there's muscles under there?
<X> well, we can cough and breathe, so there's got to be at least SOMETHING
<Vic> I'd bet it's just a cougher and a breather.
<X> probably
<X> like a little fan or something |
#20699 (0/258) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Rezod> damn I'm graphic peckish, think I'll do some litestep'ing, need to fiddle with something
<Rezod> get fiddle feelings when I listen to music
<Pixelz> I usualy get that when I see Jenna Jameson |
#20385 (0/231) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<@s7e> rofl i remember when i used to work part time ... me auntie worked at same place .... she was fit .... best and biggest babs ever
<@s7e> used to wank at coffee breaks
<+Psy> wtf
<+Psy> over ur auntie?
<@s7e> dont tell me u aint got an auntie u dont fancy |
#20848 (-2/302) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Scragadelic> honestly, goatse should be on like the french national flag |
#21184 (0/236) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<flawed> matrix reloaded was pretty good
<mikebeauc> i'm goin' tomorrow
<flawed> oh here, let me tell you what happens at the end..
* Parts: mikebeauc (mikebeauc@***************.cgocable.net)
-> *mikebeauc* oh here, let me message you the ending..
*** [mikebeauc] No such user |
#18768 (-1/245) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<russur> knox, let's play war3
<russur> I need a partner that doesn't suck ass
<friar> oh shit
<umk> i need a partner who sucks ass upon command.
<jbk> well then you came to the wrong channel
<umk> dave..?
<friar> umk, how much
<russur> umk just handed dave the business
<friar> the business was only 3 inches long
<umk> but 4 across eh?
<umk> bitch. |
#18876 (-2/288) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<manual_overide> so there was this one time, i took this huge crap....
<manual_overide> but then the cops caught me and made me give it back |
#25643 (0/212) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Woody> some guys can last longer than 5 seconds mendy :p
<Mendez> I wouldn't know - I've never had a guy give me a blowjob. |
#18757 (0/204) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Ice_raven> um has anyone tried BearShare
<\slash> it sounded a bit too faggotilicious for me
<Ice_raven> it is
<\slash> okay, that's good.
<\slash> no false advertising there! |
#20628 (-1/239) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<MiCao_> zondr, it wasnt funny to put my silly question onm the topic ;)
<ZondrZout> Well, I think it was :)
<MiCao_> yeah, dutch humor
<MiCao_> i'll never get it |
#20815 (0/201) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<FMJaguar> how do i erase a minidisc, either in the real world or the matrix world
<FMJaguar> both are acceptable
<Zaximus> FMJ: It depends on how lazy you are
<Zaximus> if you are very lazy, you can erase the minidisc in teh real world by breaking it into pieces and throwing it out
<Zaximus> if you are very lazy, you can erase the minidisc in the Matrix by shutting down the Matrix :) |
#22564 (0/206) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Therion> Reading Is Hard
<rioter> i know i ahve problems with it
<gho5t> why don't they have robots for that yet |
#20436 (-4/314) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Ri-G0d> well, I'd rather suck a cock, then fuck angelina jolie |
#25107 (-2/246) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<u-238> PARA FOR SHIT'S SAKE JUST LOOK AT MY ATOMIC MASS |
#25159 (-2/256) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<JonJonB> omg Gary Glitter is on tv
<Boko> no way
<Boko> that guy fucking rox |
#21231 (-1/213) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Giga> I hope my sister leaves. Then I can masturbate.
<Moe> why cant you do it while she is there?
<Giga> Because she's eight and she'll probably piss me off while I'm petting my willy.
<Moe> lol
<Moe> lock your door ;p
<Giga> ...Genius.
<Giga> She's leaving. I think I'll just drink soda and read bash.org instead. |
#20645 (-5/296) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<D3adlode`ViceCity> No.. it's a roleplaying night in some club
<Neodymium> Wow, I'd love to play paedophile
<Neodymium> I could go with some little model of a kid strapped to my waist |
#25145 (0/164) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
digitaltrip: http://old.jccc.net/acad/hr/jobs/02-401.htm
DotMtrx: 9.28 to stand there naked.
digitaltrip: yup
DotMtrx: Where is JCCC?
digitaltrip: the school I go to, hehe
digitaltrip: If you get the job remind me to drop my figure drawing course. |
#26272 (-1/199) ↑Funny ↓Bad ⚐Flag
<Aluminium> The biggest obstacle to a females sexuality is herself
<Aluminium> Many women wont let themselves enjoy sex
<Aluminium> and most men wont help them be comfy enough to get there, because we are too fucking dumb
<cowboy> Aluminium: nah, in many cases, we just don't care
<Fetch> I ALWAYS notice the bored look in their eyes
<tobyl> Fetch: That's the ruffies, dude.
<Fetch> no, that's the GLAZED look in their eyes ;) |
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