QDB: Quote #296024
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This quote has been fermenting for 16 years and has been voted on 39 times.
Based on preliminary voting, this quote has a 44.5% chance of being approved.

#296024* (?/39) ⚐Flag
Stranger: hallo?
You: hawks
Stranger: is anybody in there
You: just one
Stranger: you like tattoos?
You: there might be someone under the table though
Stranger: creepy
You: i like invisible tatoos
You: they look better
Stranger: hehe
You: do you like bacon?
Stranger: nope
Stranger: you like bacon?
You: you'll never get anywhere in life
You: all great people loved bacon
You: im great, so i love bacon
Stranger: well, i don't think i have to be like everyone else to achieve something
You: you should be like the guy next door
You: he loves bacon
You: maybe
Stranger: sounds boring
Stranger: and bacon is disgusting
You: not if you wrap the bacon in christmas paper
Stranger: sounds even worse
You: i like squeezing bacon juice on myself and licking it off
Stranger: my friends like grilled bacon wrapped marshmallows
You: your friends are wasting the bacon
Stranger: like i care
You: we should petition that the president change his name to Bacon Obama
You: everyone will love him
Stranger: like it matters what his name is
You: yes everyone loves bacon
You: except you
Stranger: no. not everyone
You: you love fried chicken?
Stranger: it's okey
You: fried bacon is greater
Stranger: sounds terrible
You: boiled bacon is terrible
Stranger: sounds gross
You: and boiled chicken is worse
Stranger: thats true
You: you love beef?
Stranger: no
Stranger: i don't eat red meat
You: i love dead animals
You: cooked
Stranger: that's good for you
You: you ever been to a bacon farm?
You: where the bacon roam in the wild?
Stranger: right
You: baby bacons are cute
Stranger: hehe sure they are
You: i have a pet bacon
Stranger: how cute
You: i call him joe schmoe
Stranger: adorable
You: you have pets?
Stranger: no
You: you need a pet
You: i suggest a giraffe
Stranger: they sure are funny when they try to drink water
You: they can carry your husband and children for rides though
You: you can grab on to its neck
Stranger: i hate children
Stranger: and have no husband
You: you need a husband
You: or a dog?
Stranger: no i need to get laid or a girlfriend
You: maybe you can marry a dog?
Stranger: no thank you
You: you can rent a girlfriend
You: or blow up one
Stranger: naw
You: get a girlfriend who loves bacon
Stranger: that would do nothing for me since i'm a girl
You: you're a girl who loves girls?
Stranger: yup
You: you should love bacon
Stranger: naw
You: i don't believe you
Stranger: why not?
You: i think youre a giraffe who loves chickens
Stranger: whatever
Stranger: like i care what you think
You: are you 15 year old sally from pittsburgh?
Stranger: no
You: with the club foot? and missing arm?
Stranger: nope
You: i thought it was you
You: who are you?
Stranger: no one special
You: you're a giraffe
Stranger: you like getting high?
You: i hate elevators
Stranger: they are good to have sex in
You: how do you have sex with an elevator?
Stranger: in not with
You: what language is that?
You: inuit?
Stranger: no norwegian
You: your'e from norway?
Stranger: no
You: because there arent giraffes in norway
Stranger: i know
Stranger: i've been there
You: you're from South Africa?
You: how is nelson?
Stranger: no
Stranger: nelson died
You: you're not sure where you're from are you?
Stranger: i now where i am...
Stranger: i think that's good enough
You: no you dont
You: prove it
Stranger: how?
You: who's your mayor?
Stranger: i don't know
You: i knew it
Stranger: but i could google it if you want to
You: you don't know where you are
You: do you even know what town you're in?
You: are you in a mental institution?
Stranger: hehe i know the city's name
You: what is the name?
Stranger: why do you wanna know?
You: i think you're a russian
Stranger: no
You: you're not sure where you're from?
Stranger: i know where i'm from
Stranger: what do you do in life?
You: you don't know
You: YOU DON"T KNOW
You: i think you're in an insane asylum
You: im gonna call the police to come for you
You: you russian you
Stranger: yeah whatever
You: lets go dancing tonight
Stranger: no
You: can you do the macarena?
Stranger: the what?
You: the macerana dance
Stranger: that is so last season
You: what about the lambada?
Stranger: no
You: you cant dance
You: you need dance lessons
Stranger: i'm a great dancer
You: you lie a lot
You: prove it
You: old folks like you shouldnt dance
Stranger: haha
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