QDB: Quote #237793
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#237793 (855/971) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
JZarnecki: So I hooked up with a girl for the first time in like a year.  She wasn't anything great to look at, but I'll take what I can get.
JZarnecki: Her occupation was USPS delivery.
JZarnecki: We eventually get down to business and I'm fucked up drunk and wearing a condom, but still manage to cum almost immediately because it had been so long.  I pumped like 8 times it was terrible.  She was pissed
JZarnecki: Anyways, the next day when i wake up shes already gone and i shit you not, there is a "Failure to Deliver" notice from her stuck on my door.
EJAYwarrior42: Give me her new number, I need to invite her to the league of internet superheroes.
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