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#303990 (408/472) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<TheTJ> Have you ever been in a creepy place, like a school at night or an abondoned house, when the lights go out?
<TheTJ> Sometimes you might think you're in a horror movie and about to die/be killed.
<TheTJ> That occasionally happens to me
<TheTJ> My response?
<TheTJ> I sing heavily copyrighted songs so that whatever movie I may or may not be in couldn't afford my death scene
#305711 (747/887) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) Quit (Ping timeout)
* Apathy runs off to sleep
<Apathy> also tell fantasyprone i said "saw that coming!"
<snark> future fantasyprone says to tell you she saw your mom coming last night
<snark> I have a time machine
<snark> and will pass on your message to avoid a paradox
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) has joined #elitists
<snark> fantasyprone: Apathy said to tell you he saw that coming
<fantasyprone> if you see Apathy again, you can tell him I saw his mom coming
<snark> Will do.
* snark hops in a time machine and jumps back a couple of minutes
* snark emerges from the time machine again.
<snark> All done.
<fantasyprone> thanks
#304957 (418/522) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Bombs> you're Canadian. you guys live in igloos, right?
<Kirk> You're American. You guys live in McDonalds', right?
#304196 (358/470) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Panucci : Guess what my geek wife said when we were on bed last night?
Magicpork: HTTP 411, HTTP 417, HTTP 403?
#304158 (223/293) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<welandB> God dammit.
<welandB> I went to the Renaissance Festival and hit it off with a girl so I tore off a piece of paper from the map and wrote down my number for her.
<welandB> So my friend tears off more pieces and writes down "Call Nate for gay sucking and fucking" with my phone number.
<welandB> And starts handing them out.
<welandB> So I take them away from him and stuff them in my pocket.
<welandB> My cat just dragged one right to my mom.
<welandB> We just had a sit-down talk where I had to clarify that I am not soliciting sex from strange men.
#305241 (221/291) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Zardoz> so I left my blackberry in mun's car on wednesday only retrieved it now.
<@Zardoz> 16 missed calls! wow! I'm popular!
<@Zardoz> turns out they were all me trying to find my phone.
<@Zardoz> sigh.
#304938 (304/408) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< Bob_work> This page blocked. Please enter the name of a seedless fruit to continue.
< OWA> Bob
< Bob_work> HEY!
#304713 (281/377) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<egreos> you know you're a nerd when you watch porn and pause it to see what textbooks the schoolgirl is carrying so you can judge her attractiveness based on her subjects.
<egreos> she was apparently studying "dictionary", so i turned it off.
<egreos> if it had been a physics book I would have been all over that shit.
#304240 (228/312) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Amigod> i want to play my guitar
<@Amigod> But Eleni's asleep
<HanSorbo> So wear earplugs.
<HanSorbo> So you cant hear her yelling at you to stop.
#304006 (188/258) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
Danny: Have you heard Microsoft's new Windows line?
Danny: "Windows. life without walls."
Danny: Damn right. All kinds of shit can just walk into your house whenever it damn well pleases.

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