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#73364
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2877
/3257
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<titan-x> hey everybody
<Lowkey> hey john, where the fuck you been?!
<titan-x> i was in a wreck in my friends car. snow and ford explorers do not go well together
<Lowkey> holy shit
<titan-x> i got alot of morphine though
<titan-x> apparently the first night they had me on the drip i managed to wriggle out of the restraints i had on because they noticed me acting weird after they put me on the morphine
<titan-x> according to the nurse i spoke to, and accounts from my wife after she woke up, i was running up and down the halls, with the morphine IV still attached and the bag dragging behind me
<titan-x> and as this was going on, she tells me i was yelling this:
<titan-x> "THE COMMUNISTS HAVE CONTROL OF GRAND CENTRAL STATION AND THEY WILL BRING THE COMMIE TRAINS TO TOWN! WE MUST WARN THE MAYOR CHOO CHOO"
<Lowkey> w..t..f
<titan-x> that was kindof my reaction when she told me. i really cannot put my finger on that one.
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#73370
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702
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madskz: i' tried ass fuck
takefive: Ahaha
takefive: wait, why?
madskz: what??
madskz: oh shit
madskz: *i'm tired as fuck
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#74537
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393
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(@STARSBarry) tbh i saw funniest thing ever
(@STARSBarry) there was a black dude as santa in fenicks
(@STARSBarry) and the kid was
(@STARSBarry) "your not the real santa your black"
(@Steepmas) poor Santa :(
(@STARSBarry) and he said "i am?"
(@STARSBarry) he said it was off the soot in the chimneys
Comment:
Best Santa Excuse ever ! in Newcastle
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#74752
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271
/507
)
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<Swisho> sometimes when i see handicapped people with their hands in a really awkward position
<Swisho> it helps to think of them like they were holding a guitar
<Swisho> rocking the fuck out
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14,883 quotes approved; 8,692
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