|
|
#56782 (487/593) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
boudi24: what do u use to protect ur computer from all kinds of viruses and adwares and spywares and pop ups...
boudi24: ?
metsoc30: common sense mostly
boudi24: what's that ?
boudi24: is it a program ? |
#56819 (404/548) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
(Deranged): I think my girlfriend is cheating on me...
(Deranged): I gave her one of those certificates for her birthday that say "Good for one hour of great sex anyway you want it."
(Deranged): She got this huge expression of joy on her face, kissed me on my cheek thanking me, then runs out the front door yelling, "I'll be back in an hour!" |
#56827 (360/514) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
(+[dps]rannmann) i wonder what this command does
(+[dps]rannmann) maybe it'll blow up my mirc
(+[dps]rannmann) playing: "The Infamous Double Dildo Janine!! (xxx dildo fist fuck sex porn ficken anal divx).mpg" .:1384kbps|Stereo|8:26:.
(+[dps]rannmann) FUCK
(+[dps]rannmann) NO
(+[dps]rannmann) THAT'S WHAT IT DOES
(+[dps]rannmann) ignore that!Comment: Owned?
|
#56817 (272/394) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Cobra8279: 1) sleep deprivation alone can not kill you
Cobra8279: and if anything that can not kill you makes you stronger
Cobra8279: soon, i should have superpowers |
#56852 (338/498) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Ducky: So here I am, on Google earth, spying on my ex, when she calls.
Ducky: and I’m all freaking out, because I’m thinking that she knows I’m spying on her.
Leila: Dude, you know that Google earth isn’t live right?
Ducky: Shit. Now she thinks I’m stupid and an asshole!
Leila: You TOLD her that you were spying on her?
Ducky: Um… yeah.
Leila: wow, you are stupid. |
#56811 (254/378) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<forkup> yo
<forkup> i'm off to jail for a day or so, bbl |
#56771 (298/462) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<BlackDeth> so this guy on the radio the other day was saying how there's a law that you can't sue gunmakers for injuries caused by their products
<BlackDeth> then he went on to suggest that all industries can protect themselves from liability claims if they just made their products start firing bullets
<BlackDeth> that would be awesome |
#56737 (255/399) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
dansSUCHaniceguy: Dude, you ever do something and you just know it's wrong?
dansSUCHaniceguy: The whole time you're telling yourself, This is WRONG
dansSUCHaniceguy: Just going through with it, doubt and guilt eating away at you but you do it anyway
gravybythepint: dammit did you fuck kyle's girlfriend
dansSUCHaniceguy: Get your mind out of the gutter
dansSUCHaniceguy: I drank the last of the orange juice |
#56763 (318/510) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Nero> ZXLink, I learned something today
<Nero> When someone asks you "you know what's retarded?"
<Nero> The correct response is "What?"
<Nero> Not "Kids with Down syndrome" |
#56743 (216/376) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<MootMan> Oi! I think my life is now complete.
<MootMan> Had to cool a clients PC because it was overheatin, the fan on the heatsink was garbled.
<MootMan> I had no replacements, but I had a un-opened can of Beer sitting by, fresh from the freezer (I like to supercool the stuff to near 0*C).
<MootMan> This particular can had a fairly flat serface. I only needed the PC for 5 minutes, anyways.
<MootMan> So I took some artic silver thermal goop, and spread it on the bottom of the beer can.
<MootMan> Stuck it on the proc (a P4), and put a 15lb Cisco book on it to hold it down.
<MootMan> Vola. Sub-ambient cooling.
<goombah> 0_0 thats like blapshemy dude
<MootMan> Who cares. And besides, who needs liquid nitro when you can use BEER? Toms Hardware - "10GHZ Overclocking on Grasshoppa!". |
#56696 (219/383) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
* Xerxes is now listening to Nightwish - Once
* Sanguini listened to Nightwish. Once. |
#56801 (170/330) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<LabMonkey> damnit
<LabMonkey> there went my afternoon
<LabMonkey> THANKS FOR RUINING MY LIFE, KARMA
<KArmA> its what I do
<KArmA> try and be a better personComment: #bifemunix on EFnet
|
#56705 (170/346) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<^KiwiKid^> OMG, I heard a beeping and thought it was my bus.
<^KiwiKid^> I couldn't be bothered coming here and typing bye and I yelled bye to my laptop... |
#56788 (228/486) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<sonorous> ______
<sonorous> < HALP >
<sonorous> ------
<sonorous> \
<sonorous> \
<sonorous> ^__^ /
<sonorous> (oo)\_______/ _________
<sonorous> (__)\ )=( ____|_ \_____
<sonorous> ||----w | \ \ \_____ |
<sonorous> || || || || |
#56804 (142/308) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Karlprof> NEW RECORD!
<Karlprof> I just drove someone out a channel on Freenode in *two* lines!
<Karlprof> -->| fred_basset has joined ##anything
<Karlprof> <Karlprof> I read your nick as 'breast_feed', fred.
<Karlprof> <Karlprof> I just thought you should know that.
<Karlprof> <fred_basset> thanks
<Karlprof> <--| fred_basset has left ##anything |
#56663 (114/294) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@cristipengraffe> Exchange we just had:
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi: "I am at the mercy of my cookie whims"
<@cristipengraffe> Jeph: "Well, I am at the mercy of my occasional booze whims"
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi: "Well, my whims do not effect my liver function"
<@cristipengraffe> Jeph: "Well, MY whims don't effect the size of my butt"
<@cristipengraffe> Cristi and Jeph: "Touche"Comment: #qc
|
#56727 (87/305) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Whitetail> I wonder if the pope masturbates
<Haelo> WhiteTail: It's not called masturbation.
<Haelo> Whitetail: It's called 'self-blessing' |
#56732 (58/274) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Throgan> Oh, speaking of Monty Python, I think Terry Gilliam is doing some thing on PBS about the number 1.
<cookiemonster> Leave it to Monty Python to make an entire show about piss. |
#56647 (58/284) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<tonyyarusso> I turned off my backlight by mimicking the line I found in the suspend script, I think it was 'sudo vbetool dpms off'. So then, to turn it back on, I tried to reverse it by hitting the up arrow, backspace three times, then on (effectively 'sudo vbetool dpms on'), then my password. Now the screen is cycling through colors and I can't do anything. Please help! |
|
|
|