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#54622 (377/503) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<+Radial> i think my mother knows i watch porn
<+Radial> i can't tell...
<Tsukari> Are you a male?
<+Radial> i am
<Tsukari> She knows. |
#54654 (472/644) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<hax> my boss just told a client his domain was "taken by korean cyber pirates"
<hax> we were on speaker phone with a client
<hax> and i toally lost it
<hax> then my boss yelled at me for laughing
<hax> and i told him "listen, if you're going to tell me korean cyber pirates pillaged his domain, i'm going to laugh"
<hax> "and try not to do it while i'm drinking a coke next time" |
#54624 (273/417) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Dizzy: so i was talking to my bro down in his room right
Dizzy: and i look down and see an empty condom wrapper
Dizzy: and he knows i see it
Jak: lol
Dizzy: he goes "i bought them just in case, and i tested one"
Dizzy: what does he mean by "tested"???
Jak: oh god |
#54619 (284/454) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<@Zook> fuck
<@Zook> Sister wants on -_-
<fire> ouch
<@Zook> Yeah.
<@Zook> but what she doesnt know is i added her sites to Windows HOSTS file.
<@Zook> to redirect to 127.0.0.1
<@Me> huh?
<@Zook> In other words she tries to access her sites and it doesnt let her
<@Zook> and In other words ill be back real soon :p |
#54639 (249/419) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Yaksha> I asked my brother what he wanted for Christmas.
<Yaksha> He said he wanted cold hard cash.
<Yaksha> So that's exactly what I gave him.
<Yaksha> I got 20 $1 bills, soaked them in water and put them in the freezer.
<Yaksha> When he got it, it was just a block of green ice that took a day to thaw. |
#54623 (258/456) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<maverick> I hate you leo, go fuck yourself.
<leo> Dont tell me what the fuck to do
<leo> Your not my fucking mom
<maverick> uhh, yeah i am..
<leo> ??????
<maverick> oh, i thought you said "your not fucking my mom".. |
#54649 (272/482) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
Leonard G: Welcome to HP Total Care. My name is Leonard. How may I assist you today?
some body: hi, how do you turn a computer on?
Leonard G: Please press the power button on the front panel of the system tower.
some body: is that the button marked power?
Leonard G: Yes, the big button in the front panel of the system tower.
some body: oh, I see a small socket
some body: what the hell, I just got electrocuted
Leonard G: I apologize for that. |
#54648 (251/465) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<TnT> In primary school, I carved up my dictionary so it could fit a gameboy
<TnT> and I would sneak in a few Tetris games during class.
<Avatar> <TnT>: are you shitting me?
<Avatar> you carved up a dictionary to fit a gameboy?
<TnT> Yep
<Avatar> you are the craziest man alive.
<TnT> I was soooo hoping someone else in the class would do the same
<TnT> so we could multiplayer Tetris
<TnT> and look like we're reading the dictionary
<TnT> but alas
<TnT> no one was game enough :( |
#54658 (19/399) ↑Funny ↓Boring ⚐Flag
<Mrono> man
<Mrono> i had a nightmare last night
<Mrono> i dreamed that efnet started having chanservices
<Mrono> ugh |
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