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#309533 (27/39) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<nedbat> [Tritium]: you youngsters and your kidding...
<nedbat> get off my lawn!
<[Tritium]> But im not done mowing it....did you forget you paid me to do that?
<[Tritium]> is this even your house?
#302246 (56/98) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<Fax> Yukio: did I tell you about my mutant power?
<Yukio> Fax: is it the ability to determine bra size with a single glance?
<Fax> where I can tell a woman's cup/bust size wi-...
<Fax> ...
<Fax> you take all the fun out of everything ever :C
#299680 (38/52) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<TugC> hey anyone want some freshly tested proxies?
<Syn> yes
<TugC> xxxxxxxx.com/xxxxxx
<Xero> i want some too TugC
<Xero> holy
<Xero> fucking
<TugC> i tested all of them today in charon
<Xero> HEY
<TugC> what
#311568 (33/37) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Rjx> the bigger question is why I am so fixated on personality disorders
<@digdug_> maybe you have pdfpd
<@digdug_> personality disorder fixation personality disorder
<@Dom`> pdfpd.pdf
<@Dom`> the document for pdfpd
#311564 (15/17) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
crond: to hell with emacs.
crond: emacs is like using a blender to chop your salad. you CAN do it, but it's overkill, and you just get sludge at the end.
whizzl: more like dropping your entire kitchen on the salad bowl
#311396 (33/37) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<graspee> fucking ipod shuffled onto guided meditation track and i fell asleep at the keyboard
#311366 (58/60) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
* vens is now known as venz
<aciou> this is the internet equivalent of turning your cap backwards
#311335 (48/50) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< danl> being lazy and running everything as root is so much easier
< danl> lol
< danl> damn it
< danl> I screwed up my script and lost a years worth of access logs
#311315 (21/25) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<haq> so you get thermal cycling outside the projected envelopes, plus RoHS lead free solder means all your ball soldered components eventually crack away from the boards
<haq> i would strangle the last whale to death with a dorito bag if i could get real solder back in electronics
#311282 (41/51) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<AndyWojo> If I were coming up with a package manager, I'd name it just
<AndyWojo> 'just install tmux'
<AndyWojo> and instead of a -f for forcing dependencies: 'just fucking install tmux'
#311151 (24/40) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<SmasherDynamo> !rolld100
<Ricky_Steambot> Rolled 69
<CraigK> nice.
<fairgame> nice
<Monicro> NICE
<Mon> nice
<DannoMack> nice
<Yaya> nice
<cthulhuwork> you guys are weird
<johnfw501> nice
Comment: #thesuperleague
#310721 (4/14) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<jden> i only steal iwatches
<jden> from techdweebs
<jden> i can get real close to them and blend in, then i snatch it from them in line at philz
<jden> boom, $20k watch
<jden> fence it for $1k and you're golden
<jden> 6 of those and you've made rent for the month in sf
#309308 (29/65) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
< vanu> what if like
< vanu> the higgs boson is the heart of a particle
< vanu> and it gives them mass because that is what keeps them ATTRACTED TO OTHERS
< vanu> oh shit
< vanu> i've solved it
<@sta|ker> no
<@sta|ker> you're juset high
#307740 (24/36) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<n0idx80> I have a very nice laptop with 4GB (takes 8) that the cpu fan makes a horrible noise, and I just can't bear to open it up
<Chainsaw> You feel that dust bunnies are animals too and deserve to live?
#306775 (25/47) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Nine: what is the most stereotypically hipster song?
Nine: preferably one that many people would recognize
#303166 (28/40) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<indigo> some of my fish are not very smart.
<indigo> i have some that are small catfish (1-2") with a sucker mouth
<indigo> i startled some, and they jumped above the waterline and clung to the glass in the air.
#276906 (47/61) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
xxx: told my boyfriend I wanna wake up to oral pleasure
xxx: and I woke up in the morning, cuz he was trying to stick his dick into my mouth
xxx: fuck
#309219 (25/37) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<@Kain_Dragoon> lol..... just ran google translate on a page full of names of hentai doujinshi
<@Kain_Dragoon> its funny shit
<@Kain_Dragoon> its so literal
<@Kain_Dragoon> Relocation of the capital hundred raw vagina
<@Kain_Dragoon> ROFL
<@Zinic> And this is why I don't do this
#307252 (43/67) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
HelgeSverre: ....
Lemmiwinks: You make some very good points
Lemmiwinks: .,.,, mine are all wonky
#304001 (43/83) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Liam: Are you familiar with Cleverbot?
Scaramouche: Yes.
Scaramouche: She's fun.
Liam: I have two instances of cleverbot talking to each other.
Liam: Although a lot of what they're saying is quite dadaistic
Liam: -Why are all your family and friends working?
-We are not.
-Yes you are.
-Why do you think so?
-Because your math skills are horrible. 198 minus 7 is 191.
-My marbles are right where I need them. Under the feet of my enemies...
Liam: -I have no marshmallows.
#300564 (32/52) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
Alpha_Bling: You know what a masked booby bird is?
Alpha_Bling: from galapagos islands?
BadSpoon: probably similar to a bearded tit
#300402 (41/57) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<lewwy> so i invited some chicks over tomorrow night to build a computer
<lewwy> cuz they're sorta interested in how computers work etc etc
<lewwy> but they cancelled on me this morning...
<Splinton> Ah, thats not good.
<lewwy> yeah i wonder if i scared them off after i started reffering to at as "wild unprotected pc building"
<Splinton> ...
#258726 (39/51) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<AtoB> I needed an extra xp cd, so i downloaded one and formatted my computer. When i was about to reinstall, i found out that i had forgot to burn the cd...
#311302 (32/62) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<dn5> I have int start = 1476620495; and int end = 1476620495 (unix timestamp), but if I have int res; and then res = end - start, res returns 0 when printf with %d
<dn5> why?
<izalove> because it's the same number?
<fstd> duh
<dn5> okay thats not supposed to happen haha
<fstd> ,reset
<candide> Days since our last accident: 0
Comment: ##c at freenode
#311121 (33/71) ↑Funny ↓Unfunny ⚐Flag
<atom_bomb> my girlfriend has been pressuring me to write a book about about my engineering methodology
<atom_bomb> (after i told her how much money the agile software alliance makes)
<atom_bomb> my methodology is essentially a longwinded justification of procrastination
<atom_bomb> it just happens to be scrum-compatible and highly effective
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