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#30608 (322/476) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<God> my car broke
<God> so my dad bought me a 100 dollar geo metro to use until its fixed
<God> 1994
<God> 70,000 miles
<God> runs great
<God> i got hit by an 18 wheeler first day driving it and the guy gave me 300 bux on the spot
<God> hes like "no please i dont want to deal with cops or insurance" "how does 200 sounds" ...."uhhh.." "ok fine 300!"
<God> "i guess that works"Comment: #xbox, irc.irctoo.net
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#30625 (305/511) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
ethun: this is crazy
ethun: i never got a virus with Windows ME
Zaphod-B.: of course not
Zaphod-B.: viruses dont infect other viruses :P |
#30618 (270/464) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[niffie] I have no inhabitions right now
[aphr0] would you finger my asshole?
[niffie] no
[aphr0] then you have inhibitions |
#30594 (205/365) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<J3anyus> i just received a sign from god that i'm going to get laid at the concert i go to tonight
<J3anyus> i was coming home and decided to check my mail, even though i wasn't expecting anything
<J3anyus> opened it up, and there was a little envelope
<J3anyus> opened that up, inside was a "FREE SAMPLE FROM TROJAN CONDOMS!" |
#30564 (209/401) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Rac00n> Security Level: Paranoid, Maximum, Medium, Low, RedHat. |
#30609 (202/410) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<cdowdsux> So my friend was telling me about how he tried to commit suicide by taking 20 Advil...so I was just like.. "Dude, why take 20 Advil when you could have just taken 3 Aleve?" |
#30620 (160/324) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lizzie-Rei> I'm losing my flab.. by not doing anything
<Lizzie-Rei> actually..
<Lizzie-Rei> lifting wood helps
<Lizzie-Rei> and pushups
<Lizzie-Rei> and slapping guys
<Lenoh> yes, liftin "wood" does help
<Lizzie-Rei> ¬_¬
<Lenoh> and "pushups"
* Lizzie-Rei slaps Len |
#30624 (163/331) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Kaelic> Michael Jackson fans are fucking psychos
<Kaelic> my god they cry when he leaves and they can't see him
<Kaelic> umm ISSUES
<Lothtiriel> he's a bit of a nutcase too though, so it fits well
<Orca> "A bit"
<Kaelic> lol
<Kaelic> 'Show us your baby' 'Okay I'll throw him to you' |
#30631 (185/381) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lippizanr> i'd be a lesbian if i didn't like penises so much. |
#30614 (157/323) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ryano> but i still like tattoos and piercings on chicks
<ryano> which is why i go for lina's friends
<ryano> and not lina
<Lina--> i have tattoos
<jons> those aren't tattooes, they're varicose veins |
#30552 (214/462) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Summoner> Archimedes, Newton and Pascal are playing Hide&Seek.
<Summoner> Archimedes is counting down, Pascal takes off and hides, but Newton takes few steps, turns around, comes behind Archimedes,puls aout a chalk, makes a square 1 meter by 1 meter and steps in it.
<Summoner> Archimedes finishes counting, turns around and, praise the Lord, sees him immideatly:
<Summoner> - A-Ha, Newton!!!
<Summoner> Newton smiles and says:
<Summoner> - No, this is Newton per sqare meter, and that's Pascal. |
#30598 (165/373) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<iczer> oh man, this quest to get my chocobo license sucks
<iczer> have to try to feed a chocobo every ingame day 6 times - and one day in ffxi is one hour in real life
<ChrisDKK> iczer, NERD!
* ChrisDKK goes back to playing FFTA
<iczer> but it will be worth it! i can then ride chocobos!
<ChrisDKK> iczer, I have I have to feed your mom for 6 days...
<iczer> what is the reward?
<iczer> ......... oh god.........
<ChrisDKK> haha |
#30621 (76/252) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<madog> because your a little pee-on
<madog> who has no pull on this network
<madog> try it agian, ill make sure you're glined
<davidc> haha
<davidc> ok madog
* madog (scottx@vulnerable.org) Quit (Local kill by humble (no pull on this network :))) |
#30616 (108/372) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<phr0work> using linux is like using windows, except every time you try to do something like install a program or a driver or set a different resolution, a big black dude runs in and kicks you in the side of the head |
#30588 (85/297) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* @cagey strangles the fuck out of the verizon guy
<@cagey> CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW, MOTHERFUCKER?! |
#30591 (0/352) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
*S_R remembers orgasming over an AMD T-bird two years ago |
#30551 (-5/339) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Josho> Mac OS X 10.3 "Panther" Mouse Pad. Big. Black. And Powerful.
<Josho> Measuring 7 3/4" inches in diameter
<hy_dro> Big. Black. Sodomizing the 16 year-old girl next door.Comment: #geekissues
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