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#27889 (328/470) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <ParadoX> lol my friend just said he stole a bong from this guys house, but from how he described it, it's a penis pump
<ParadoX> he said he put his mouth to it, and it smelled funny
<ParadoX> HAHAHA
<Phucker> Owned. |
#27828 (298/440) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag [5:36] :: truder- [test@intrud3rz.users.undernet.org] signed off.. [Quit: A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over; nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home.] |
#27841 (209/345) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Stevns> Mental note: when searching kazaa for southpark episode "cartman gets an anal probe", be sure to include the keyword 'southpark'!!! |
#27910 (222/374) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Enrico> do you like your co-workers
<Thibster> I'd like them to leave me alone
<Enrico> have you tried shooting them... I bet you didn't.
<Thibster> no I tried
<Thibster> they respawn |
#27844 (197/345) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <INFINITE> heh, i just figured out Neo backwards is One
<z3ro> er.. Oen
<INFINITE> oh wait .. Shit |
#27911 (196/348) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <CrackZ> I'm gonna be getting a new boss soon too
<CrackZ> its a power hungry female
<CrackZ> ya know the type
<CrackZ> her 'can do' profile is going to clash with my 'can't be arsed' profile |
#27770 (185/329) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <aeonite> !8ball will my life magically turn around after this weekend with happy unicorn fairy dust wishes and chocolate popsicle kisses so I can be happy forever and ever?
<FarkStatsBot> aeonite: My sources say no.
<aeonite> !8ball is it gonna suck?
<FarkStatsBot> aeonite: My reply is no.
<aeonite> !8ball typical, then
<FarkStatsBot> aeonite: My sources say no.
<aeonite> !8ball is that all you can say is no?
<FarkStatsBot> aeonite: Signs point to yes. |
#27900 (176/318) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <B2uc> and why do girls say they want honesty...then don't...like the other night I was like "What would you like to do?...movie or go out to eat?"...it was like "Well what do you want to do?"...I was like "Well if it was up to me...we'd just go home and fuck and then you could drive yourself home while I catch the last of the ball game"
<B2uc> and then I get a dirty look. |
#27763 (222/410) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag HermitKing: So Star Trek fans are Trekkies, and X-files fans are X-philes...
HermitKing: ...what do you call Buffy fans?
Cat1013: Virgins |
#27904 (226/440) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <@redfox> fuk
<@redfox> just found out my sisters been in labour for 7 hours
<@bovineaux> omg ur gonna be a daddy! |
#27902 (189/373) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Ned> rofl
<Ned> Sud N' Fud
<Ned> When trying to bang a girl, she gives that same old story, "I not that kind of girl.", "I don't fuck on the first date.", "I'm catholic.", "Stop asshole.", etc. etc... After hearing all this bullshit, you whip out your handy bar of soap. Then lather up her armpit (or any other joint you prefer), and proceed to fuck that instead
<CB[UN1]> you forgot the usual line
<CB[UN1]> "hey stop im only 12"
<iX|Blue|afk> lol
<iX|Blue|afk> i usually get "woof bark bark" |
#27905 (178/352) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <plexr> do you know std c++ ?
<plexr> or is a weak understanding of VB your only strength
<ahorse_> oohhhhh he just said the equivalent of *yo momma* |
#27818 (148/304) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Redback> when i win lotto im gonna buy a dual g5 and not use it just to spite all the mac users that cant afford one
* Redback = bastard |
#27776 (158/336) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Silne30> time for my 8 minute abs workout
<~EventHorizon> 8 minute abs work out?
<Silne30> yeah
<~EventHorizon> what are you, a fucking old ladie?
<~EventHorizon> *lady
<Silne30> naw im a guy with a guy
<@crazycheetah> ...
<Tumbleweed> .....
<Silne30> gut* |
#27835 (118/268) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Migishu> Tai Chi - Kung Fu in bullet time |
#27906 (145/335) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <chabo> have you guys ever noticed that quite a few of the quotes on bash.org deal with people who go on IRC and tell everyone about it when something major happens, rather than do what they should, which is usually go to the hospital? |
#27912 (114/262) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Vexer`> i'm arabic / muslim
<Traktopel> im more muslim than you
<Vexer`> you are?
<Vexer`> YOU TERRORIST! |
#27915 (131/303) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Extigy> Ships are Long, Hard and full of sea men!
<blondee> i don't get it.... |
#27860 (119/283) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag seph429: i need to write me some hacks for the game of life, i appear to suck at it |
#27913 (103/257) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <@bandXXX> HAHAHA clipse is on new justin timberlake album
<@bandXXX> sad thing is
<@Blaxthos> that you know this |
#27907 (114/298) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <cyborgd17> this is fucked up, i hadn't jerked for about 1 week *out of boredom :|* and all these girls start flirting with me for some reason, then i finally free up some room in the ol' nutsack and i'm a loveless geek again! no-one comes near me....masturbation sends out bad vibes!
<twistoliver> you're such a fucktard, don't you know everytime that you masturbate, god kills a kitten
<hellyeh15> yeh, you must of killed their cats
<cyborgd17> that makes sense, cuz i've killed enough kittens to make a kitten bridge to the moon...and back
<jonbridgenash> wait wait wait...hold up.....girls? |
#27826 (87/247) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag -!- Pooky [laptop@vw19667.iinet.net.au] has quit [Ping timeout for Pooky]
-!- PookyOut is now known as Pooky
< Pooky> hmn. nickop is lagging
-!- Pooky [laptop@vw16083.iinet.net.au] has quit [Killed (NickOP (Kill requested by PookyOut))] |
#27903 (95/279) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <KiTTyKaT`> What state is Alabama in? |
#27909 (68/280) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <slippy> wtf is this shit on bbc1
<slippy> how on earth do you prevent friendly fire?
<slippy> don't fight with the americans?
<slippy> hrhrhr
<doggie^> hahah
<doggie^> maybe if we painted all our military equipment red white and blue
<doggie^> they would be so overcome with patriotism they wouldnt be able to blow us up
<slippy> lol
<slippy> paint golden arches on all the tanks
<slippy> then a little sign under saying "this is not a drive-thru, you dopey obese fools" |
#27684 (56/236) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <@afkaos> OMFG
<@stuff57> ?
<@afkaos> I think my Grandpa is using 1337 speak WTF?!
<@afkaos> This is my grandpa's E-mail address
<@afkaos> edd13@xxxxxxxx.xxx
<@afkaos> His name's Edward
<@afkaos> so it's like wTF?!
<@stuff57> lol
<@stuff57> h3y s0////13!
<@stuff57> 84(|< |// //'/ |)4'/
[<@stuff57> we didn't have any 1337 speak. |
#27897 (35/289) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <b1nk> i'm rich
<b1nk> one of the richest kids in toronto
<efnex> haha, getting rich in canada is as easy as getting sars in china |
#27748 (24/210) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <snag> in my dreams it was like i was dreaming as normal but i kept getting pron popups.. heh as if i was watching a movie in full screen then all the sudden .. XXXPASS 4 FREE!
<BombScare> thats cause you always jerk off to the free preivew section of porn sites before you go to bed |
#27823 (-1/307) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <Voorhees> YAYAY IM GETTING STONED IN !) MINS
<Voorhees> 10 even |
#27901 (-5/409) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <MagicCow> I hate people who think that being gay should give them special rights.. it's not like they are women, or black.. who were unfortunately born wrong.. they made a choice to be stupid faggots. |
#27886 (-7/449) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag * BLACKDUDE (~ihateyou@ip68-102-88-243.ks.ok.cox.net) has joined #pain
<BLACKDUDE> hey yall
<BoxingNun> black dude?
<BoxingNun> why dont u take that computer back to the nice white people u stole it fromComment: cute?
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#27827 (-1/177) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag <tiatoraasah> in my internet options where it says LAN settings...... should i have the checkbox of atutomatically detect settings clicked?
<Blue^BearMP> tiatoraasah - no, you should've checked the box saying i know i should format but i dont want to lose my pr0n |
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