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#18754 (350/494) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Tac0> FiZi
<Tac0> are u connected to the internet?
<FiZi2> What the fuck do you think |
#21286 (327/466) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Charles> Well, Smith is a virus now.
<Charles> (Whee irony regarding his 'humans are a virus' thing in the first movie)
<Charles> So I think he wouldn't so much upgrade as mutate, like when he developed the ability to infect people.
<Zereth> I've heard him comapred to a pop-up ad.
<Zereth> Kill one and another dozen show up.
<Zereth> "Mister Anderson, click here for HOT TEEN BUTTFUCKING." |
#19210 (250/402) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kow> I went to laser quest today
<kow> and some kid goes
<kow> how do you turn the auto aim on? |
#19386 (316/514) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Kr1sten> I lost my virginity last night
<[zT]Lunchie> Oh shit! Get it back! You have to find!!!
<[zT]Lunchie> I'll look in the car, you look by the sofa.
<Kr1sten> You are such an ass. |
#20553 (278/458) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<SACS|Maul555> download 5t5ha55t
<SaintDuriel> jeeze whats with your 5 man... if you hit a key close to it does it do a five?
<SACS|Maul555> ive5 been leaving m5y lap5top on 24/7... 5think 5t5ha5ts bad 5fo5r a lap5top?
<Gorin> yes, now fix the your five button
<SACS|Maul555> i 5cant5 i glu5d i5t, bu5t 5th5e glue 5cam5e o5f5f5
<SACS|Maul555> 5yo5u5 don5t unde5rs5tan5d 5the 5 bu5t5ton is missin5g... ho5w i5t 5came ou5t is wha5ts 5causin5g 5the 5p5roblem
<Gorin> uh huh
<SACS|Maul555> 5the sp5r5ing und5e5rne5a5th is b5roken... so 5th5e li5t5tl5e me55chanism k5ee5ps 5tou5chin5g 5the pad
<Gorin> i think you're lying.
<SACS|Maul555> 5can i 5type 5this 5fas5t5 an5d pu5t in5e55r5ro5rs on5 pu5rpos5e?
<SACS|Maul555> pff5t |
#19994 (160/263) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<yakk> oh fuck
<yakk> I just realised that the "faith based missile defense" wasn't a joke |
#21042 (262/440) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jbroome> i will be assilimated
<YanceySlide> Or something.
<jbroome> spelled correctly
<YanceySlide> Being assilimated sounds like something that happens in prison.
<jbroome> that would be assmutilated
<YanceySlide> Point. |
#19872 (219/369) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<raz> i'd have to take off the valves, replace the fuel pump
<raz> flush the engine out, take the heads off, order the new lines
<raz> the spring pressure is going to be hard to handle in my garage
<raz> i'm not sure which new fuses i would need, so i'd have to look that up
<raz> besides that, i haven't used a blow torch in a while and not sure which ends to taper off
<guyen> dude it's a fuckin' oil change |
#20130 (171/295) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<juditness> I RECEIVED MY PROFICIENCY CERTIFICATE =D
<Goatasaur> i'm going to get my procrastination certificate one of these days |
#21419 (220/391) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(smasho) i saw matrix 2 today
(Cip) bout time smasho
(smasho) "How did they copy smith" somsone said
(smasho) i said ctrl c |
#19894 (235/419) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Surfdog> dood
<Surfdog> my dad was just like "you know its ok to be gay"
<Surfdog> but couldn't keep a straight face |
#19445 (212/383) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<*AGBot> grins.
<Eye_Candy> SEE?
<*AGBot> I'm not a bot.
<Eye_Candy> DID ANYONE ELSE SEE THAT!?!
<Vic> See what?
<Zero> See what?
<Eye_Candy> god dammit.
<*AGBot> Kill, Ross... Kill them all.
* Eye_Candy rocks gently, whispering 'there IS a bot, there IS a bot' |
#19976 (193/366) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Technogeek> I've had to akick Bruce five times now.
<Technogeek> I feel like I'm playing whack-a-mole over IRC. |
#23818 (224/423) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<bLanKer> omg my right hand hurts alot
<bLanKer> what is it called?
<bLanKer> when ur hands hurt b/c of repetative motion?
<|404notfound> masturbation |
#21675 (178/341) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lauren> I ROX0RS JO0 NEWBIE!
<GravitonSurge> why don't you CHOKE YOURSELF WITH THE CORDS. WHY DO YOU COME HERE. NOBODY LIKES YOU, NOBODY TALKS TO YOU, 3/4 OF THE PEOPLE HERE DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU
<GravitonSurge> just a thought |
#23077 (169/324) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Kevyn> Woohoo, girls college softball on ESPN2.
<Kevyn> I think it's college. There's NCAA logos everywhere, but these girls look fourteen. Score!
<Pedro> Is that Jennie Finch girl pitching?
<Kevyn> I don't know. I have it on mute. |
#20063 (182/357) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Konami> huge mofo assignment due friday
<Konami> that i haven't started
<silique> oh....
<silique> that's in two days....
<silique> is it big?
<Konami> yes
<Konami> yes, it is
* silique shakes his head
<silique> why...
<silique> didn't you do it earlier?
<Konami> umm
<Konami> because
<Konami> it was more fun and easier to not do it |
#19983 (181/363) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@Son_Gohan> you are lame, and pwnz is such a fucking gay word
<@Son_Gohan> its even worse then w00t
<Zeph> woot pwnz |
#18465 (158/323) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jitspoe> friends, heh! Social interaction! Heh, a game programmer craves not these things! |
#18326 (171/351) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<ouijakins> My lips were blue last night. I wish I had been well enough to take a pic.
<rdgzt> ouijakins: Whoa.
<rdgzt> ouijakins: Is it asthma, or asthma + a flu, or what?
<treaps> what she fails to mention is that it was from SUCKING MY COCK
<ouijakins> I dunno. I have pnuemonia which caused asthma.
<rdgzt> Oh, pneumonia.
<ouijakins> I wasn't exactly coherent.
<hpj> She got sperm in her lungs.
<hpj> Man, we're a great support group.
* ouijakins eats hpj.
<ouijakins> Ya.
<rdgzt> Pneuspermia.
<ouijakins> Yknow, I was all scared about dying last night.
<ouijakins> But uh, the sperm jokes make it ok.
<ouijakins> Because I know that God loves me for giving me text friends like you assholes. |
#22113 (158/328) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<@RickBitch> If you break up with a chick, and u see her and her new boyfriend together some time, go up to the boyfriend and say
<@RickBitch> "Just remember, everytime you kiss those lips, my dicks been there" |
#21185 (144/300) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<DarkFox> Dude, I need to cast growth on...things
<Mel> Fox, like food to help feed starving nations?
<DarkFox> I was thinking more along the lines of my penis, but yeah, that would work, too. |
#20023 (190/400) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<crakfjsdklnjkfdbnjkdfhjwerhljk> SHE SKIPPED TWO GRADES AND SHE'S WASTING IT ON ENGLISH AND PHILOSOPHY MAJORING
<zamros> HAHAHAH PHILOSOPHY MAJOR TELL HER THAT SHE CAN BE A WAITRESS WITH THAT UNDER HER BELT
<Stiltzkin> NOW, DID YOU CHOOSE THE PANCAKES WITH BACON, OR WAS IT FATE?!?! |
#18586 (130/274) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
(@juslooken) you do realise sweetyungthang... that the only girls who are going to cyber with you are ALSO guys pretending to be bi chicks |
#18357 (169/362) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<+rm-Symp> im 500 lbs. @ 4'3"
<+TlMMAH> thats like a puddle of fat
<+TlMMAH> you must have grown around your IRC chair |
#18600 (164/359) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Makes> that was real cute, asshole
<Fansy> Thank you!
<Makes> welcome to ignore
<Fansy> one time a friend ignored me for 2 days
<Fansy> it was some serious cold-shouldering
<Fansy> I was so bothered by it, whenever I called his house and he hung up I would just keep talking prteending he was there
<Fansy> until the BEEP BEEP BEEP sound anyway
<Fansy> You know Makes, I feel like I could tell you anything
*** Makes sets mode: +m |
#20007 (137/304) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* +Dejiko_nyo modded his toaster
<+Vassago> you can play burned pop tarts on it now? |
#18505 (144/328) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<jwz> "Anti-Spam Legislation Opposed by Powerful Penis-Enlargement Lobby"
<ogw> the NRA? |
#21716 (127/302) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
< fluxion> perhaps microsoft has realized that humans cannot accept
perfection, and therefore the software must inherantly be
flawed |
#19798 (110/267) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<D3adlode> http://decoy.iamod.com/badday.jpg
<D3adlode> ...
<Taylor> thanks for that D3adlode
<D3adlode> you're welcome
<MaDCoW[sleep]> ;s
<FaQz0r[zof]> hahah
<Taylor> no really, thanks for showing me the picture of a FUCKING PENIS, while my mum walks in with a drink YOU COMPLETE SHITHEAD, at least provide a damn warning |
#22136 (105/257) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<cam[work]> "The weight of the cookie is projected to reach 40,000 pounds or, as Immaculate Baking Co. again points out, the same weight as four elephants or one 40,000-pound bag of feathers."
<Uther> is that a session cookie?
<cam[work]> yes
<cam[work]> a 40,000lb session cookie |
#20195 (112/286) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<merk> never make a comment to your friend that a mentally challenged person in a wheelchair is getting more action than him |
#18391 (89/247) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Lyme> note to self: accidentally turning off surge protector with pinky toe = bad |
#20972 (74/236) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Heythere> i've always wanted you
<Heythere> every night, i dream of us in a prison cell
<CommanderStab> That's understandable
<CommanderStab> I've always wanted me too |
#18741 (76/245) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Bludshed> dang
<Bludshed> my eyes hurt today
<Bludshed> ive never had to sit at the computer with my sunglasses on
<Bludshed> before now... |
#25087 (55/223) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<kineticupid> doot doot dildonuts
<abbiegoodman> lol
<capnfluffy> oh my
<kineticupid> that would be a sweet company name
<kineticupid> dont know which i'd sell though
<capnfluffy> lol
<capnfluffy> dildos
<capnfluffy> definitely dildos |
#18359 (53/237) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<S8NSSON-cantDCC> *gigle* while i wiggle
<DaveMan> ok, in the south, thats acceptable, but not here |
#18730 (53/241) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<sprite> blah
<sprite> outlook died
<sprite> uh oh.
<sprite> outlook's really dead
<barr> you underestimate the power of the dark side
* sprite watches outlook slowly corrupt her applications |
#22040 (54/248) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<broken_la> Ah hell, I'll just run the 2.6 kernel.
<broken_la> Bleeding edge.
<daku> 2.5 you mean
<daku> there is no 2.6 out as far as i know
<broken_la> It's on the net.
<broken_la> I got it off of Kazaa |
#19170 (51/241) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<QorpsE> the best was the guy who died from too much CS
<QorpsE> now THERE is one motherfucker who fully deserves what he got |
#18464 (44/207) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Zimbu> Listening to WvSoulja's raps is like masturbating with a cheese grater-- sorta amusing, but mostly painful. |
#18365 (53/261) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* gibb blinks
* jitspoe winks ;)
* gibb sinks :o
* jitspoe thinks
* Murdock stinks.
<Murdock> doh! |
#20781 (52/300) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<psytek> i'm a bash.org virgin
<fook> you've just been penetrated. |
#19791 (42/282) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Vyse`work> FUCK SNAKE
<Vyse`work> thats nice as FUCK!
<Vyse`work> dude
<Vyse`work> ill show my boss ASAP
<Vyse`work> when he comes in
<Vyse`work> DUDE SNAKE
<Vyse`work> fucking move here for a job =)
<Vyse`work> my boss would so fucking fire the chick who does it now
<Vyse`work> and hire you
<Vyse`work> look at the website she is working on
<Vyse`work> dude
<Vyse`work> snake isn't here
<Vyse`work> im talking to no one
<Vyse`work> FUCK |
#19993 (14/274) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Leimy> damn
<Leimy> holy SCHMIDT
<RangerRick> eh?
<Leimy> grep -r goto * | wc -l == 29612
* Leimy vomits in terror |
#19972 (10/202) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
HolyViper7: do i go outside and run, despite the fact it is 100 degrees fahrenheit and sweat my fucking balls off.....
HolyViper7: or do i sit inside and look at porn?
HolyViper7: toughie...
Lotach: tough decision
Lotach: either way you get sweaty |
#21225 (7/216) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Blindy> Burger, you can get cubans in Canada?
<Burger> blindy: yes, we can get cubans, we have no trade embargo with them
<Blindy> Lets say I sent you money
<Blindy> could you buy some cubans and ship them to me?
<Blindy> the cigars not the people
<Huroya> Why the hell not the people?
<Huroya> Are you some kinda RACIST?
<Blindy> yep
<Blindy> i hate crackas
<Blindy> fucking crackas
<Blindy> damn the man |
#18429 (5/205) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<hadeZ> you live on your own right?
...
<hadeZ> but basically you pay with yourself
<hadeZ> for yourself rather
<Fembot> you said PAY, right? |
#22349 (3/266) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<gilesw> so wtf is damn v-station
<gilesw> it was supposed to be out ages ago
<ToyLaNdeR> thats like a train station, but run by this guy named victor |
#21047 (2/287) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<lav> that's what happens to people caught cheating
<lav> l33t
<Cecil> is that the one where they throw the guy's comp out on the street? |
#18628 (-2/442) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<aday> one day, im gonna make it into geekissues.org/quotes one day |
#18748 (0/306) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Sniper_12> Hey, Can You Download Memory for your Video Card? |
#25086 (-3/399) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
03:20 * irc_bob lols.
03:20 < iddqd> hahahahaha, you said the l wordComment: #monoxide on irc.freenode.net
|
#18331 (-1/317) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Jessi> Vag fingered me over 10 times in 2 minutes! |
#21851 (0/275) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
SonofthePioneers: you and your friends know he's threatened to cut himself?
SonofthePioneers: and others
Horrid Vanity: shutup he has told that you guys mess with him on this message board
SonofthePioneers: what message board?
Horrid Vanity: i dont know he just said that he put some thing online about the bitch he took to prom and it got blown all out
SonofthePioneers: im from wales i don't know anything about a message board....i met him in an aol chat room about 6 years ago
Horrid Vanity: there wasnt even internet 6 years ago
SonofthePioneers: HAHAHAHA yeah there was
SonofthePioneers: the internet has been around for almost 50 years
Horrid Vanity: really
SonofthePioneers: yup |
#19790 (0/252) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
* jesus (datax@traff.jesus.paa.fylla.net) Quit (Local kill by einride (god says go away)) |
#19113 (-1/279) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
[@phyper] i may actually have to get an ipod too now
[@phyper] just because
[@phyper] i've always wanted a watch... |
#19936 (-1/261) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Carter> Anyone here have any experience with Terravista?
<Miraluka> is it like... Boca Vista?
<FeelTheBANG> I think it's a retirement home for militant muslims. |
#18400 (0/232) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<k1|-mOoF> don't you just hate those ridiculous acronyms - omfgroflmao
<k1|-quick> stfuufimak
<k1|-quick> shut the fuck up u fuckin idiot monkey ass kid
<k1|-quick> haha
<k1|-quick> im just kiddin tho
<k1|-mOoF> =( |
#18507 (-3/295) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
<Turbovec> SCREW THE ATOMIC BOMB, I WANT THE FUCKING ATOMIC BONG! |
#19806 (-4/249) ↑Good ↓Awful ⚐Flag
-!- Assasins [Assassin@HSE-London-ppp3509865.sympatico.ca] has joined #linux
<Assasins> when i reboot linux
<Assasins> it tells me to enter password and login
<Assasins> how can i enter graphic linux?
Shadur> Assasins: ....... Congratulations. I'm pasting this log and saving it to a webpage for all my friends to laugh at hysterically.
<Assasins> Shadur: yes yes you stupid nerd go suck a dick and hack into ppl
-!- Assasins was kicked from #linux by Shadur [Bye now.] |
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