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#311561* (?/1) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
figa2003: caterfxo: running it is like idk an orgasm. You'll see a '90 computer run smooth like it was an i7
caterfxo lols
figa2003: caterfxo: as long as you don't try to open internet
figa2003: caterfxo: internet kills dreams
figa2003: Internet kills everything
figa2003: Privacy, friendships, fun, reality, happiness, money... I don't want to live in '2xxx :(
#311560* (?/4) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<mechanicjay> Remember folks, it's okay to be a mother fucker, as long as it's someone else's mother.
<joe_z> your own grandmother is OK then?
#311559* (?/4) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<kapitank> According to all known laws of aviation, it is impossible for Donald Trump to reach his coke. His stubby arms can barely lift from his fat body
#311558* (?/3) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Mr_X> if anyone here has a android please pm me ok?
<blkshp> Data is offline at the moment
<Menzador> Shoot, I turned off the Human-Cyborg Relations module on my C-3PO to have it serviced by my local Tatooine Electronics dealer...
Comment: ##chat on irc.freenode.net ( Freenode )
#311557* (?/6) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
A busy programmer, a Russian
took breaks on the porcelain cushion
with newspaper pages
Though seated for ages,
he would only read them while flushing
#311554* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<APTX_> so
<APTX_> I unpacked my switch and I turn it on for the first time. I felt it rumble a bit. After a second I realized that it was an earthquake and not the console...
<DerIdiot|work> ba da bish
<APTX_> the timing was really good
#311553* (?/9) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<soakingbook> i masturbated in such a way that my orgasm was perfectly timed with the new year.
<umbrifex> coming in with the new year
<soakingbook> yes.
#311552* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<butt0ns> I didn't say sucking dick for bitcoins was a good business model, just that it happens
#311549* (?/7) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<kakashiAL> in jacascript you have then, which is map and flatmap combined, so we cant have Promise(Promise(x)) or Promise(Promise(Promise(x)))
<kakashiAL> many people critsize that
<kakashiAL> I would like to know why you want to have that
<kakashiAL> I dont know a single case where you want to have a Promise(Promise(x))
<Brewster> Same... I prefer to use PinkySwear(x) for a Promise of more than one dimension
#311548* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<TsarBoris> Some things I got this Christmas - boots and a knife
<SlovenianStranger> boots and a knife
<SlovenianStranger> this is either some rockies gift or slavic gift
<SlovenianStranger> but slavs also give socks
<TsarBoris> I got socks as well SlovenianStranger
<SlovenianStranger> nice
<socks> no you didnt
#311547* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<dvalue-work> :)
<dvalue-work> err
<dvalue-work> :(
#311546* (?/12) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Fuchs> I'm horny *shows his horns*
<Fuchs> they were £10 and fit quite well
#311545* (?/8) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Jerome> You been up to much?
<TravelerInRedAndGreen> Nah, Christmas shopping mostly lately.  About to climb on the roof.
<TravelerInRedAndGreen> Glad it doesnt get icey here.
<Jerome> What is it with Americans and climbing on roofs at Christmas
* MsDrWatson is on TravelerInRedAndGreen's roof right now
<MsDrWatson> peeing down the chimney for blackmail material
<MsDrWatson> ...oh god. PEERING
<MsDrWatson> PEERING, I SAY
<Waterjuffer > you're much less likely to fall that way
#311544* (?/7) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
BadSpoon: @1tee: I have a knack for posting semi-relevant things at the right times
I don't really know why
1tee: Because you can read
BadSpoon: by jove I think you've got it
1tee: By golly
#311542* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Cain> ..what's wrong with me that I make things love me so easily? why am I so nice and friendly yet so empty inside and wishing I wasn't real.. that I was a illusion, some digital thing?
<solitary_blue> i get that sometimes too
<solitary_blue> then i just fart and i feel better
#311541* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Lynndis> "prepubescent metalcore"
<Lynndis> that's a phrase for the ages
<Das_Cheese> :P
<Lynndis> It's like a fancier way of saying pedometal :P
<Das_Cheese> they're not pedos
<Das_Cheese> they're just little kids that never grew up
<Lynndis> pedo (well, paedo, to be accurate) refers to being prepubescent
<Lynndis> paedometal would be prepubescent metal
<Lynndis> If you want *paedophile* music, on the other hand
<Lynndis> We call that "country" around these parts
#311540* (?/11) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
Ol' Larry Ellison is like EA Games... they see something good and profitable, buy it, fly it straight into the ground, wait for the fire to die, then expect people to want to buy the carcass...
#311539* (?/8) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<dgriffi> some whackadoodle is putting antivax screeds into stuff at a Babies R Us store down in Lynwood
<Silent700> I think VMS is a little advanced for infants
<dgriffi> heh
<Branes> Yeah, they're still in nappies so they get pee dee pee.
<qu1j0t3> *groan*
<qu1j0t3> they can yell in all eight registers, that's for sure
#311538* (?/12) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<@Rjx> I think you should be able to get extra votes for every person you manage to kill on election day
#311536* (?/15) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<poo_al> A friend of mine once went to a public toilet for a dump and found to his horror that the last person in there had wiped their arse with the toilet paper while still leaving it attached to the roll and then wound it back up out of sight. So as well as getting it on his hand, my friend accidentally wiped his arse with someone else's shit GROSS!
#311535* (?/14) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<wastrel> did you ever see that movie "toy story"
<wastrel> did you know they named all the characters after debian releases
<DarkPsydeLord> wheres woody?
<wastrel> iono
<phunyguy> lol
<DarkPsydeLord> wheres buzz?
<phunyguy> there was a Woody... a Sarge... I can't remember all of them off the top of my head.
<wastrel> your dumb and bad
<phunyguy> oh.
<Ben64> buzz, rex, bo, hamm, slink, potato, woody, sarge, etch, lenny, squeeze, wheezy, jessie, stretch, buster, bullseye
<Ben64> *mind blown*
<Ben64> "Debian's unstable trunk is named after Sid, a character who regularly destroyed the toys."
<Ben64> :O
<phunyguy> sid was a bad kid.  like wastrel
<phunyguy> btw, you can distinguish an alligator from a crocodile by paying attention to whether the animal sees you later or in a while.
* phunyguy backs away slowly because it was a terrible joke.
<wastrel> your dumb and bad
<phunyguy> my dumb and bad what?
<wastrel> face
<wastrel> hahaha
<phunyguy> lawl.
<phunyguy> you got me good, I guess.
<wastrel> that's what you get for making fun of debian
Comment: #ubuntu-offtopic @ freenode
#311532* (?/10) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Shi-dublin> and face it, if cartoons were real yo ass would be 100% rizelmine
<Shi-dublin> big monster flappin titties
<Lastair> if cartoons were real i'd be like a ren and stimpy grossout closeup except it would never zoom back out
#311531* (?/13) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<pflanze> in any case, I can see why you changed your userid from ``bigassniggaonascooterdrinkingcaprisun`` before launching the business
#311530* (?/17) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<Archduke> i fucked a girl in a graveyard on saturday
<plaque> was the body warm at least?
Comment: x
#311529* (?/13) ↑Keep It ↓Trash It ⚐Flag
<ntnix> " it's suspected that Terri Schiavo's initial cardiac arrest was caused by electrolyte imbalance due to an extreme liquid diet."
<ntnix> Electrolytes are what vegetables crave
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