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#311125 (-92/276) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@barometz> Ha, I just agreed to "There was a problem loading the content of this EULA."
<@barometz> Wonder whether that's binding.
#302029 (-76/224) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<celti> Fuck, my cigarette burnt down to my toes.
<jules> don't you mean fingers?
<celti> No, I mean toes. I was smoking with my toes so I didn't get ash in the keyboard.
<jules> WTF
#197814 (-32/104) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Jamm0n> when i first cummed i thought i broke my penis
<Jamm0n> i tried to shove the goo back inside
#299672 (-83/251) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Leitari> omg
<Leitari> king kong is long
<Leitari> ^^
<Leitari> my ass hurts
<Leitari> wait
<Leitari> that didnt sound right
#311462 (-40/112) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<PeopleProgrammer> "(23:41:42) devi: pidgin isn't the most robust irc client"
<PeopleProgrammer> the last thing I saw as I turned on an option in pidgin and crashed my machine
#309928 (-15/47) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<surskitty> the pair-up system is way less silly than Moulder carrying around a horse in fe8
<surskitty> I love you, weirdly buff healer guy
<surskitty> and your ability to fucking carry cavalry
<Geight> Moulder did that through sheer force of not giving a fuck
Comment: From a discussion on Fire Emblem 13's mechanics.
#311534 (-89/241) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<GargajCNS> so i was looking at my VR headset and realized
<GargajCNS> my parents always told me not to sit close to the TV, and now in 2017 i'm literally jamming TVs into my eyes
#172905 (-62/164) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<AgentRenegade> i think im gonna love my new highschool class^^
<AgentRenegade> during a lecture a boy suddenly stood up and yelled "Its 13:37, its 1337 time!!"
#199365 (-35/97) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<knoeki> :pd: <--- tounge kiss ;_)
<knoeki> or 'french kiss' as the americans may say
<knoeki> in dutch a 'french kiss' is a blowjob
Comment: #zomgwtfbbq irc.p2p-network.net
#303236 (-92/234) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<jkalex05> my grandma jogs with me
<jkalex05> and she runs ubuntu
<jkalex05> ftw
<jkalex05> she says windows are for carebears
<jkalex05> that made me lol
#306380 (-89/231) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<kingsly> my tampon feels weird
<Cassy> You're a girl?
<kingsly> no
<kingsly> wait are those things only for girls??
Comment: #mugglenet on irc.mugglenet.com
#310904 (-33/93) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Phase> what html do function does function calls actually generate?
<Phase> if youcan't tell, i didn't speel welo
<Phase> sleep'
<Xena> can you words that again?
<Phase> well'
#310019 (-40/106) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<richterthethird> after doing some research
<TheBadSpoon> you STILL can't find your penis?
#309608 (-99/255) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Reven> i remember this chick trying to tell me i got her pregnent and extort me for money
<Reven> i sat her down on my bed said "wait here" and went to the closet rummaged for a couple seconds and pulled out a coat hanger and started straitening it
<Reven> and said "dont worry i've done this before"
#240878 (-43/113) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<doc|work> hey, what happened thermopylae?
<ardchoille> he got burned out?
<ardchoille> He was fired?
<ardchoille> Got too hot under the collar?
<doc|work> ardchoille: btw, 7-11 here has giant slurpee vats
<doc|work> giant as in gallon sized probably
* ardchoille is still the king of bad puns
<doc|work> hence the change of subject :)
#304182 (-82/206) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<@Erasmus> So advertising homeopathy is now illegal?
<@Erasmus> Or other quacky things.
<@Sebas> "Buy my ducks!"
* @Sebas gets arrested
#310126 (-68/174) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<schuko> i've had my share with C working with embedded software
<schuko> it's like star wars
<schuko> you shave off a few bytes and then there's a new hope
<schuko> then you run the test suite and the empire strikes back
Comment: #/g/sicp on Rizon
#300490 (-66/172) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Palantyre> If a lycanthrope becomes a merchant, will he be known as a warewolf?
<Ce`Nedra> *grins* yes
<Palantyre> Okay, just checking ;P
#311509 (-109/273) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Dr_pressure> Church is like book club except the book never changes and only one person gets to speak
#297656 (-90/226) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
Carly: Hmm... I was wondering what that sound was... and why my leg was getting wet
#311533 (-109/257) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<ben_vulpes> code is not fucking art
<ben_vulpes> code is a bespoke railway engine hauling your carcass across the desolate sea of capitalism
<ben_vulpes> imagine if every single container ship had an entirely custom engine humming along inside, and the three people who knew where it needed grease applied daily basically just live in it
<ben_vulpes> that's software
#195546 (-40/96) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<Leslie_S> I dunno if anyone that would care is here, but im sure anyone could laugh about the situation im in now
<Leslie_S> I've been stuck at this damn terminal for 2 days because i was involved in a crash at 3mph
<Leslie_S> it did THAT MUCH damage to our equipment...
#310215 (-102/228) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<kmc> i had a dream just now where i was in a gymnasium and they had fire alarm pull stations but they also had a similarly shaped "call/cc alarm" which I think you were supposed to pull if you found a way to write call/cc (it was expected that people in this gymnasium would be doing a lot of programming in total dependently-typed languages)
#311543 (-94/220) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
lomancer: anyone can have shitty ideas
lomancer: it's shitty execution that matters
#310174 (-34/80) ↑Funny ↓Not ⚐Flag
<alise> "Europe is the national anthem of the Republic of Kosovo."
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