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TodayLatestBestTopWorst1337Random |
#63545 (490/704) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<CtrlAltDestroy> Alright, so I was working at Steak n Shake today
<CtrlAltDestroy> There was this new girl
<CtrlAltDestroy> For her break, she wanted a chili 5-way
<CtrlAltDestroy> So we told her to make it herself cuz we were busy
<CtrlAltDestroy> So she goes to make it
<CtrlAltDestroy> And like most n00bs do at least once, she mistook the barbecue sauce for the spaghetti sauce
<CtrlAltDestroy> So she poured barbecue sauce on her 5-way.
<CtrlAltDestroy> I was sitting next to her when she started to eat it...
<CtrlAltDestroy> When she took a bite, she screamed
<CtrlAltDestroy> "OH MY GOD, WHAT THE FUCK, BARBEQUE?" |
#50344 (151/251) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<che> there's a programmer's union?
<Wintermute> yes
<Wintermute> Local 100100101110101010010 |
#12080 (142/272) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<@charlie_x> i have a command line program on my pc called dont.com
<@charlie_x> if you type dont format c:\
<@charlie_x> it says
<@charlie_x> "ok i wont" |
#28320 (286/344) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Carp_AFK> i planned to dye my hair this weekend
<Carp_AFK> till i was told i was supposed to put vaseline all round my forehead, and wear gloves
<Carp_AFK> and theres no way im going to a shop buying some rubber gloves and a tub of vaseline |
#2875 (86/206) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<matts_> arto hates me, it's about time
<artoh8su> no, i dont
<matts_> oh
<artoh8su> i just couldnt fit artoh8suunlessyournameismatts in my name |
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T-Shirt Hell: Shirts you'll never have the balls to wear in public
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#526 (207/336) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<matt`> <goh`> guilty you spelt speed wrong
<goh`> spelled*
<McMoo> <goh`> YOUR USUALLY SO CAREFUL
<goh`> you're*
<goh`> you guys are assholes |
#8003 (27/195) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Jon-> tom
<Jon-> imagine if your ISP pulled cable
<Jon-> what would you do?
<mewse> quit irc?
<mewse> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<mewse> hah. |
#3561 (58/248) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<mightyflo> they need to make a car washing sim
<nitrifik_> I'd play it.
<FE2work> what r u a spic ?
<blazemore> haha
<blazemore> would you like to buy a vowel?
<blazemore> or even a whole word |
#32455 (403/485) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Bad_CRC> I went to the hospital today, and it's called "olmstead medical group" so the whole place had "OMG OMG OMG" all over it. |
#5303 (99/239) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<@atarax> DrConway: Some kid told me a couple days ago "They just came out with internet 7.0" |
#6239 (51/199) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<BBKSleep> I got busy on thursday, it reminded me of why I don't get busy. |
#61121 (340/436) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Ked|work> You know you've used linux more than google when typing 'man pipe' into the search bar doesn't instantly seem like a bad idea. |
#72748 (352/442) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<insaneidiot> so i have to write a paper for english about why Launcelot likes to run around killing people
<MC> He was beat as a child
<Tar> it's because he yearns desperately for approval
<HunterX11> its the name
<HunterX11> if you name a girl candi, she'll be a stripper
<HunterX11> if you name a boy jeeves, he'll be a butler
<HunterX11> if you name a guy launcelot, he's gonna fucking lance peopleComment: irc.bungie.org #hbo
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#33647 (202/356) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<anity> bbyyyeeee
<ZestyO> ok, have fun
<anity> in the bath?
<anity> hehe i'll try
<ZestyO> plenty of fun to be had in a bath
<anity> *gets out rubber duck*
<ZestyO> jesus christ I so mis read that...
<anity> hehhe i was thinking that...i super carefull typied duck
<ZestyO> hehe
<ZestyO> the u and i keys are right next to eachother
<anity> hehhehe yeh
<anity> or maybe the 'duck* was a typo
<anity> ull never know
<anity> hehehhehehe
<ZestyO> lol
<anity> heheh i'll soon see when i get in the bath |
#36758 (78/168) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<ankleteeth> i cant believe people are still here...
<ankleteeth> what keeps you people amongst this crowd?
<FennecFoxen> eh? an old autojoin which I removed in February...
<FennecFoxen> then my system was reset to an image made in January.
<FennecFoxen> So.
<FennecFoxen> :) |
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#23529 (154/248) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<LucyFerr> credit cards are like hot psycho chicks. Always fun to fuck but sooner or later you just know you are gonna pay dearly
<DocGonzo> but unlike hot psycho chicks, if you put pictures of your credit card on the internet, you'll LOSE money |
#8238 (26/174) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
* sabeel (~blackHoru@62.61.192.142) has joined #winprog
* delete[] sets mode: +v sabeel
<+sabeel> is google working ...?
<+O_6> !google sabeel is retarded
<+logiclrd> O_6: http://www.prairienet.org/cpt/archives/2000/oct00/0006.html
<+O_6> ^^
...
<+sabeel> !google O_6 is also retarded
<+logiclrd> sabeel: Sorry, the server did not return expected response headers. This probably means that there were no matches to your query.
<@violus> huhuh
<+O_6> sabeel, touche, retard
<@violus> owned. |
#35205 (423/549) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<LabRat> google is smart so I don't have to be. |
#300501 (384/446) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<altoid> my cock is as big as snow leopard's :P
<altoid> (i sure hope snow leopards have big cocks now that i said that)
<Dave2> I bet you're the first ever person to say "i sure hope snow leopards have big cocks" |
#59761 (241/383) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<anotherpadawan> you know, the Nintendo DS ad campaign "Touching is good" is going to give whole new meaning to "blaming video games"... |
#14055 (320/415) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<foobar> the FUNNIEST tech glitch ive ever heard of happened at my workplace
<foobar> ok.. so we run an internet storage service right? and one of our clients is a large photo site that allows people to upload pics and view them online
<foobar> well.. our software had a little bug in it .. sometimes if a file is uploaded and not cached properly by the system, the system will deliver the same file for hundreds or thousands of different files
<foobar> so what happened is someone uploaded some bestiality pictures, and those got caught in the cache, so everbody uploading their 4th of july pics got them ALL replaced by the same picture of a girl jerking off a horse
<foobar> 50,000 times |
#25128 (201/283) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<@daerid> I have a drinking problem
<@daerid> I just spilled pepsi on my shirt 4 times in a row |
#52074 (328/420) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Dogan> man, it's so nice to upgrade your camera from 16 mb to 1024 mb
<Dogan> pictures meter is just 9999 no matter what
<Dogan> it feels like i've picked up an infinite ammo cheat or something |
#300287 (375/403) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<@Toba> Note to self: check new boxers before wearing. I just found a 'quality control passed' sticker on my wang. |
#6155 (140/258) ↑Funny ↓Awful πOld
<Mooglez> the lack of intelligent and cultured converstaion bores me
<Mooglez> laterz bitchez |
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